Purple Summer
by lmbrtvll
Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she’s worth so much more than she thinks? AH
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: S.M. owns Twilight._

_  
AN: Here it is, my next Twilight story. For those of you who read Trafficking, I thank you for sticking with me and I hope I didn't disappoint. For those of you who haven't read it, go check it out! And enjoy Purple Summer!_

_Thanks to Jess Meyer for setting me up with two wonderful betas!_

Penname: Imbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 1

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

* * *

**Purple Summer**

_And all shall fade_

_the flowers of spring_

_the world and all the sorrows_

_at the heart of everything_

- Duncan Sheik & Steven Sater

**BPOV**

I dropped my heavy bag by the door, sighing in relief as the tension left my back. I had just gotten off of a seven hour shift at the restaurant I worked at, after having been at school all day. I was a senior in high school and having trouble coping with the stress of balancing school and work. It didn't help that I didn't _want_ to work. I just kept telling myself 'a few more weeks', then I would be finished with high school. And then maybe, just maybe, I would make my escape – college.

This whole situation was new; previously I had been living with my dad and my brother Emmett in Forks, Washington. I was happy there. Emmett was three years older than me and while he never let me forget that, we had a great relationship. And then there was Charlie. He may not have been the most emotional guy, but he was a great dad. I had a comfortable life there.

I missed the both of them, and my best friend Alice Cullen so much. She was my confidant and a fierce friend. Definitely a little overwhelming at times, but my closest friend nonetheless. Then there was her older brother Edward, who was the same age as Emmett and coincidentally his best friend. And since the four of us tended to hang out together quite a bit, he and I were pretty close as well. No where near as close as Alice and I, but definitely good friends. He was almost like a second brother, and it didn't hurt that he was good looking either. His constantly messy copper-colored hair and striking green eyes, that could_ always_ tell when I was lying. It was no wonder he had every girl in his school chasing after him. I tried not to think about it. Truthfully, we just liked being in each other's company.

About four years ago, things changed drastically. My parents divorced shortly after my birth and my mother left my father with my brother and I when she moved out. Apparently Charlie wasn't good enough for my mother Renee. After almost fourteen years of no contact from her, Charlie received a phone call, which ended up leading to a lot of yelling. They were clearly fighting over something and I found out shortly after the phone call that that something was me. Renee was demanding Charlie send me to where she was currently living, Phoenix, after fourteen years of near abandonment. Neither Charlie nor I liked this, but Renee was threatening with legal papers.

After painful goodbyes and tears I arrived in Phoenix a week later and just in time for school. And in time to find a job that Renee demanded I get. She wouldn't have a "worthless" daughter living with her. Physically and emotionally, being overworked as I was, I was exhausted and struggling. I couldn't tell Renee, she would just tell me I was used to a life a luxury and needed to snap out of my lazy habits. She had used her connections to get me a real job as I was still under the legal working age.

At the sound of my bag hitting the floor, Renee's voice called out from the living room. "Took you long enough to get home. There's work here that needs to be done. Good for nothing girl."

I winced at her harsh words. I should have been used to it by now seeing as everything that woman said to me was negative and mean. There was no love in this house, just criticism.

Days had turned into weeks and weeks turned into months. Not once had I heard something nice come out of Renee's mouth that wasn't doused in sarcasm. According to her, Charlie did a poor job at raising me; I was lazy and an embarrassment. Hearing her put down Charlie hurt me more than anything she would ever say about me. I was fiercely loyal to the man who had raised me.

The worst part was when Charlie passed away from a heart attack a year ago; Renee wouldn't let me go to his funeral. I cried, begged and pleaded but she wouldn't give in. I hated her for it. Of course I couldn't say that to her, nor could I act upon it. It would be unbecoming of a young girl to say such things to her mother, or so Renee would say. Neither Charlie nor I were worthy of a plane ride to Forks and I was starting to believe it. That was also the last time I had heard from Emmett.

My stomach growled, reminding me I hadn't eaten since lunch earlier in the day. Renee had heard it too. "Your dinner is on the counter. Eat and get your homework done. Then go to bed. You have a lot of work to do tomorrow."

I found my meager dinner, a sandwich with a single slice of cheese, waiting for me and I scoffed it down, barely tasting it. I absentmindedly began washing my dish, in a hurry to get upstairs to start my homework. I reached to my left to grab a towel to dry the dish when it slipped from my wet fingers and flew into pieces when it hit the tile floor. I stood frozen, not knowing what my next move should be. Renee appeared in front of me, knitting needles still in hand. "You foolish girl! You can't even do the simplest of things. You're worthless," she spat.

Tears pricked at my eyes as the ceramic shards bit at my skin and I fought to keep my emotions in check. Crying would just be another incompetency on my part. I scrambled to clean up my mess before grabbing my bag and running upstairs, eager for once to get my homework done.

Even after being here for so long hearing Renee criticize my every move was still difficult and painful. I caught myself in my dresser mirror, almost startled. I hardly recognized myself – I had aged overnight. I was thinner than I was before, leaving me with prominent cheek bones and purple circles under my eyes. My hair was unstyled and flat, the plain brown matching the hardened brown of my eyes. Was this me? I saw no trace of the soft youthful girl I once knew myself to me be.

_It's because you're worthless, Bella._

Even in the sanctuary of my own bedroom, Renee's voice still haunted me. Maybe she was right. Maybe I was worthless and deserved this. She was my mom after all; she only wanted what was best for me. She must say what she does for a reason. I'd been here so long that I didn't know who to believe anymore. Myself or Renee.

I woke up the next morning with the same feeling of dread I had woken with every morning for the past four years. When I first got here, I used to dream of my father and brother showing up and rescuing me. Those dreams have long since faded, but the hurt in the pit of my stomach and the lump in my throat still remained. I continued on in spite of my unhappiness.

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I quickly showered and dressed for the day giving myself plenty of time to get downstairs and put the coffee on before Renee awoke. She didn't like it when she arrived downstairs to find an empty coffee pot and me at the breakfast counter. She said it was irresponsible. With a flick of a switch the coffee was brewing and I poured myself a small bowl of cereal. Even though I was starving after my small dinner last night I dared not pour myself more than Renee allowed. If she found out I ate even the slightest bit more than the allotted amount, I would get the lecture of a lifetime and should I become what she termed a "fat slob", I would find myself ostracized.

Renee shuffled into the kitchen just as the last of the coffee brewed and eyeing my cereal bowl she gave me a knowing look. I shrank back further into my seat and lowered my eyes. "What time do you get off work?"

I cleared my throat of the residue from the milk and kept my eyes lowered. "Ten."

"Did you get all of your homework done? We can't have you falling behind; you're not the sharpest crayon in the box." Renee knew exactly how to upset me and I struggled to push back tears. Swallowing the last bit of cereal I nodded silently.

My heart thudded in my chest as I worked up the courage to ask Renee about college. Neither of us had discussed it and while the guidance counselors had helped me put together applications for various schools, I had yet to act upon them. "Um…Re-Mom?"

"What?" She squinted her eyes at me, a warning really. She wasn't going to tolerate nonsense.

"I was thinking. About college. I wanted to apply to a few places, see if I got in. Maybe take some classes?" I reflexively flinched as I stopped speaking, waiting for her stinging words.

Renee sputtered into her cup of coffee and nearly choked. "You've got to be kidding me." Her words were full of acid. If she hated me so much, which it seemed, why did she insist on me living with her?

"Do you really think you're smart enough for college? Or worth the money? If by some miracle you got in, you would be taking the spot of some poor deserving honors student. Can you imagine that Isabella? I won't allow it."

I stood as quickly as I could without letting Renee on to my dangerously teary eyes. I hastily washed my bowl and ran to get my backpack before running out the door. Only then did I let my tears fall. College was my ticket out of here. I was desperate; I was slowly suffocating in Renee's overbearing presence and cruel words of wisdom. It was now or never, I had to take this chance.

I finished my walk to school in record time and headed straight for my guidance counselor's office. I knocked on the closed door and waited for the kindly voice of Mrs. Fisher to beckon me inside.

"Come in." Her voice warbled through the thick wood door and I entered shyly, taking a seat in the corner.

"Ah, Bella! Good morning. What can I do for you?" She was shuffling through various papers and had yet to look up at me.

I hesitated, taking a deep breath and grasping for one more ounce of confidence. "I would like to send in the college applications I filled out earlier."

Finally her eyes pulled away from the large pile of papers and stared back incredulously at me. She seemed at a loss for words for a moment, before recovering.

"Well, that's wonderful dear! I'll finish them off and send them in right away. Good for you!" She smiled warmly at me and I couldn't help but smile back. I made it through school without much incident and I only tripped once at work. Besides Renee's little outburst this morning, today was a relatively good day.

I quietly entered the relatively dark house after work. If Renee was already sleeping I didn't want to disturb her. I could use some piece and quiet.

"How was your day, Isabella?" Renee's voice cut through the dark like a knife and I jumped, holding back a scream. I breathed heavily, trying to calm my racing heart.

"Um…f-fine." I had no idea where this conversation was going, but I could tell by the tone of her voice it would not end well.

"I'm so glad to here it," she sneered. "I got a call from the school today, from your guidance counselor. She just wanted to let me know she sent out your college applications today."

"Oh."

Renee jumped up and barreled towards me, her face contorted into one of fury. "You disobeyed me, you stupid, stupid girl! I told you, you're not good enough for college. You _can't _do it! And yet, you go behind my back and apply anyway. I'm done with you. I can't help you anymore. You're more hopeless than I though."

"Re-," she cut me off.

"Just get out. Get out and never come back."

I was dumbfounded. Would my mother really kick me out of the house over something as inconsequential as college applications? Just because I applied didn't mean I would go, or that I would even get in. I stuttered, but lost my chance to say anything to her when she picked up her car keys.

"I want you gone by the time I get back." She slammed the door behind her and I heard her car start up. I don't know why, but I was hit with an overwhelming need to cry. For once I allowed myself to as I packed up my few belongings. I didn't really know why I was crying, I mean, this was what I wanted. To get away from Renee and her cutting words. But it still hurt nonetheless.

It was just confirmation that no one wanted me. I was undesirable to everyone. Who would want a stupid, worthless, plain girl?

Not knowing what else to do, I called a cab company and told the cab driver to head to the first place I could think of, the airport with just a single suitcase and my small savings in hand. I was heading to the only place I knew I could go where I at least had the possibility of being wanted. I was heading home. I was heading to Forks.

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_AN: Please review and tell me what you think. I would like to know if I should continue and would appreciate and thoughts or ideas. _

_-lmbrtvll_


	2. Chapter 2

Penname: Imbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 2

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

AN: First, my thoughts and prayers go out to the family of Daddy's Little Cannibal. I didn't know her, but I know what it's like to lose someone suddenly. It's never easy. She was an extremely talented writer and will be missed dearly. Secondly, I apologize for the delay. I just finished finals as well as battled a nasty case of laryngitis/bronchitis. Not fun. And I've been using the amazing Project Team Beta (thanks to Jess Meyer, Amber Bachmeier and DCSD) to polish my chapters and make them pretty for you all. Unfortunately for you, it can take time since the chapter goes through two betas. Unlike my last story, which wasn't beta'd, this one is. I LOVE Project Team Beta and will be sticking with it so I can't guarantee super quick updates. But I can promise to keep working hard. Hopefully it's worth it.

Enough with the long note. Enjoy!

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**Purple Summer**

**Chapter 2**

_But it still stays_

_The butterfly sings_

- Duncan Sheik & Steven Sater

I arrived in Washington exhausted and in desperate need of a shower. The events that had transpired in the past few hours replayed randomly and ramshackle as I had sat on the plane. I had drawn from my personal savings to buy the ticket and briefly thanked God Renee had let me keep some of my earnings.

The sliding doors opened in front of me, and I stepped forward into the cool air of Washington, my single bag in hand. I walked up to an empty cab and knocked on the window.

"What can I do for you?" The driver looked to be about fifty or sixty with whitening hair and a wizened face.

"I need to go to Forks."

He huffed and thought for a moment. "That's a ways, Missy. It's gonna cost you."

"I can cover it." I was desperate, and I was sure he could tell.

He nodded. "Hop in."

I gratefully slid into the backseat, not even bothering to put my suitcase in the trunk. Being all that I had, I clung to it. _What am I doing here_? I didn't even know if Emmett still lived in Forks. He probably hated me after I failed to show up at Charlie's funeral. The year following the funeral I had wanted to call Emmett and explain, apologize. I wanted to tell him I still loved him and beg for his forgiveness. But I was only allowed to talk to Emmett when _he_ called me, and he hadn't since my lack of appearance at the funeral.

"You wanna talk about it?" The cab driver was studying me through the rearview mirror. His question caught me off guard, and I faltered.

"I've seen that look before, kid. You get good at reading people when you've been doing this as long as I have. Who died?" he continued.

"My dad," I whispered. Technically it was true. Charlie's death, while not the direct reason for my returning, definitely fell somewhere in this whole messed up turn of events.

"Sorry to hear that kid."

"Thanks," I managed to mumble, shrinking further into the warm leather backseat and wishing the uncomfortable cab ride would just end.

"Just look at it as a challenge and a chance to start fresh. Celebrate your dad and the life he lived. Don't mourn. That's the only way you'll make it through."

I fought back hot tears that threatened to spill from my eyes and shuffled aimlessly through my bag trying to distract my mind. I couldn't let this stranger see me cry! He would know what a worthless person I was, just as Renee said I was. She'd been telling me that for four years; there had to be some truth behind it.

The rest of the ride passed in silence. I think the driver caught on to my mood and didn't push me with anymore questions.

I turned and looked out the slightly foggy window, trying to remember the vividness of the green foliage I knew passed by us just beyond the window. I found irony in the color green. Here I was returning to the only place I knew I might be welcome, a land of green. Wasn't green supposed to represent new life? Growth? But I felt the opposite, I felt like Renee had sent me into a backwards spiral. She had sent me back to where I came from to live out my worthless pitiful existence in a sea of green, a celebration of new life. Irony was not my friend.

_Renee appeared in front of me, knitting needles still in hand. "You foolish girl! You can't even do the simplest of things. You're worthless," she spat. _

Renee was right. Renee was always right. I _was_ worthless.

Four hours later He finally pulled up in front of a white house, tiny and cozy just as I remembered it. The only thing that was missing was Charlie's cruiser. My heart gave a silent yet noticeable pang and I pushed the image of Charlie's grinning visage out of mind. Now just the old red truck Charlie got for Emmett sat in the driveway.

"This is it," I instructed.

The cab rolled to a stop and I handed a few bills to the driver. "Keep the change."

I didn't want to be around him anymore than I had to. I needed to get out of the car. With a squeal from the tires the cab pulled away leaving me standing in front of what was now an intimidating house. What used to be a warm and welcoming white was now sterile and cold looking. The windows, empty and dark, seemed to glare at me like judging eyes, knowing why I came. As luck would have it, the rest of the house was dark and upon trying the front door I found it locked. I had absolutely no idea where Emmett could be or if he would even be home tonight. I checked my watch, eight o'clock. He was in college, of course he would be out late. Besides, I couldn't bother him even if I did have some way of contacting him. I didn't come out here just to be a pest and after how I had treated him when Charlie died. I didn't deserve to bother him.

Not surprisingly, a nice stream of rain had started. Coming form Phoenix, I had no raincoat and my heaviest article of clothing was a sweater. Ugh, I couldn't afford to get wet. Nor did I want to. I ran up to Emmett's truck hoping to find shelter but like the house, it was locked. Crap. I ran through the downpour back to the front stoop and squeezed myself under the little alcove. It wouldn't keep my completely dry and if I stayed out here long I'd get wet either way. But right now it was my only option.

I sat on the cold concrete and curled inward, trying to make myself as small as possible. I shivered as my body struggled to adjust to the cooler air. I bit my lip in an effort to control my crying. I wouldn't cry and I couldn't complain. I deserved this. If this is what I had to do to get back in Emmett's good graces, then so be it.

I closed my eyes as it was too much effort to keep them open. They were heavy and puffy with exhaustion. My last thought before sleep took over was a wish for my dad.

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**3****rd**** Person POV**

"Thanks for the ride Edward!" Emmett unfolded himself from his friends silver Volvo and pulled his keys from his pocket, grumbling at the heavy rain. It was three AM and both Emmett and Edward were exhausted after studying at the Cullen's for the whole evening.

Emmett wanted nothing more than to take a hot shower and climb into bed. He didn't spend much time in this lonely house since his dad died and tomorrow would be no different. Both he and Edward were seniors at Seattle University and were gearing up for finals. While Edward was pre-med, Emmett was studying general science with hopes of eventually studying sports medicine and took advantage of his friend's vast knowledge of the topics his courses covered. It didn't hurt to have Edward's dad, Dr. Carlisle Cullen, around for a little extra help.

"What the hell?" Emmett's eyes gazed upon the curled mass lying next to his front door. His raised voice alerted Edward and both ran to inspect whatever had made its home on the front stoop. As they got closer they could tell the bundle was definitely a person, a young woman. They slowed as they reached her, unsure of how to progress.

"Wake her up, Em," Edward pushed. They were both soaking wet now and he wanted to get home and into dry clothing. But this was interesting. In a town like Forks it wasn't everyday something like this happened.

"Me? You're the one with the tender heart. You do it!"

Edward chuckled and backed away a little. "Your house Em, your responsibility."

Emmett sighed and slowly climbed the three steps up to the landing of the stoop. Her face was hidden by her wet brown hair but he could tell the girl was young. And cold. She was shivering in her sleep. He placed a soft hand on her shoulder and gently shook her. She didn't respond so he shook her a little harder, this time calling out as well.

"Hey. Time to get up. Hey!"

The girl stirred and clutched her head before looking up at what had woken her. She blinked a few times as if trying to clear her vision. "Emmie?"

Her voice may have been hoarse but Emmett would recognize it anywhere. And that face. She may have grown up a little but there was no denying who she was. He stumbled and tripped backwards down the steps landing on his butt in the mud. He didn't even notice. "Bella?"

Bella? That name piqued Edward's attention and he went over to Emmett and hoisted him up before glimpsing at the now exposed face of the girl. The woman that was before him most definitely was not the little Bella he remembered from four years ago. She had matured into a beauty that shined through, even under her curtain of wet hair.

Yet, it wasn't the similarities that caught Edward's eye, it was the differences. The happy sparkle that seemed to glow from Bella was gone. She was thin and somewhat meek looking and timid. The Bella he knew was never timid. Yes, she was shy around new people and easily embarrassed in the spotlight, but that didn't keep her from speaking her mind or joining in on the boy's witty banter. What had caused Bella to change so drastically?

Emmett was on his feet and at Bella's side before Edward even realized he was off the ground. "Bella? What are you doing here?"

Bella brought a shaky hand to her face and wiped away as much water as she could. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bother you. I shouldn't be here."

She moved to lift herself off the stoop but only made it into a kneeling position before she collapsed backwards against the railing. It was clear she was fighting a losing battle against the wet and the cold. Emmett ran up to her and tentatively yet with a sturdy arm pulled his sister up. "You're soaking wet. And freezing."

"S'okay. I'm gonna go." Bella's head lolled to the side and her legs gave out. Emmett pulled her up into his arms before her unconscious form could hit the ground and he could feel her shivering against his chest even though there was an unnatural heat rising from Bella's forehead.

"Edward! What do I do? I think she's sick." Not only was Emmett caught off guard by the unexpected appearance of his sister, he also had no idea what to do in this situation. He was panicking.

"Put her in my car. We'll take her to my dad." Edward immediately headed back to the Volvo and opened the back door for Emmett. Emmett gently laid Bella across the back seat and pulled one of Edward's old sweatshirts off the floor and draped it over his sister's small form. As soon as Emmett was seated in the passenger seat Edward pulled out of the driveway and onto the main road. Maybe it was his anxiety or maybe Edward really was driving slower than usual, but the normally easy drive seemed to drag on.

"What's she doing here Emmett?" Edward didn't mean for his voice to have such an accusatory bite, but how could Emmett not know his little sister was coming? He looked over at his friend, only able to make out his face when a flash of lightening lit up the sky. Emmett's eyes were wide with panic and he was breathing hard.

"I don't know man! I had absolutely no idea she was going to show up. I'm just as surprised as you are. I mean, I haven't spoken to her in over a year."

Edward let it drop, but the silence in the car was thick and uncomfortable. The unchanging sound of the windshield wipers, interspersed with the thunder echoed in Edwards head as he tried to organize his thoughts. Last he heard, Bella was doing well in Phoenix. At least that was what Charlie had repeated after a phone call with Renee. That was a year and a half ago. Except Bella certainly didn't look like she had been thriving in Arizona. He was lucky he and Edward had a light enough schedule with classes on Monday through Wednesday only, or he may have never had the chance to find Bella.

"Is your dad going to mind us waking him up at this hour?" Emmett glanced at the bright red clock in the dashboard. It was three thirty in the morning.

"Actually, he was working a late shift. He probably got home about a half hour ago. And he would never say no to helping you or Bella. You guys are family."

Edward finally pulled up the long driveway and a few minutes later parked his car in front of the Cullen's beautiful house. Especially after Charlie had died, Emmett spent most of him time here. Not only were the Cullen's welcoming and supportive, but their home was surrounded by woods. It didn't get any quieter than that. Or more peaceful. Edward and Emmett had the habit of visiting home a lot since their schedule allowed. The long driveway insured privacy while the full glass windows covering the majority of the walls insured light and atmosphere. The house was large by anyone's standard yet with its sleek lines and numerous windows it wasn't overbearing.

Emmett gathered his sister up in his arms and followed Edward up the steps of the covered porch to the front door. Edward unlocked the door and quietly entered into the vast foyer of the house. The only light was a bright glow emanating from the kitchen and Edward followed it, his wet shoes squeaking on the hardwood floor, coming face to face with his father.

"Late night?" Carlisle Cullen raised a blond eyebrow at his son and chuckled before returning to his glass of orange juice on the counter.

"Dad, we need your help." The smirk immediately left Carlisle's face and he walked over to his son and gripped his upper arms, giving him a once over.

"Are you in trouble?"

Edward pushed his father away. "No. Nothing like that. It's not me. It's Emmett, well, Bella. Bella is here. She's sick."

Needing no more prompting, Carlisle left the kitchen in search of the Swans. He found them in the foyer, Emmett standing in a puddle of water, holding a bundle in his arms. Without delay, Carlisle approached Emmett and lifted the sweatshirt up. "Goodness! She's burning up. Bring her into the spare bedroom."

Familiar with the house, Emmett nearly ran up the stairs to the unused bedroom. He heard someone enter behind him and turned, expecting to find Edward or Carlisle. Instead, Esme stood in the doorway sleepy-eyed and in her flannel pajamas holding a pile of fluffy looking towels.

"Carlisle told me. Come, bring her into the bathroom. I'll get her changed into some dry clothing."

Almost without thinking, Emmett followed Esme into the bathroom and placed his sister on the floor, leaning her against the tub. Without comment, both worked quickly to dry and change Bella and Emmett averted his eyes as much as possible when his sister was topless. This was not how he wanted to get reacquainted with his Bella.

Esme stood and placed her hands on her hips. "All done. Just carry her back to the bed for me and go get Edward to find some dry clothing for you."

Emmett started to protest but Esme shushed him. "No arguing. We can't have you getting sick too. Now go."

As Emmett was leaving the room, he passed Carlisle who held his typical black doctor's bag in one hand and a medicine bottle in the other. In doctor mode, Carlisle took a seat on the side of the bed where Bella was curled up into fetal position and placed a hand to her forehead holding it there for a moment before brushing back her damp hair. Bella moaned against the cool contact and whimpered slightly.

"I know sweetheart, we'll get you feeling better." Carlisle turned to his wife with sad eyes. "If you would, I'll need a cool washcloth and a glass of water. And you might as well send the boys in. I can hear them pacing by the door."

As soon as Esme opened the door, Emmett and Edward flew into the room. "Carlisle, is she going to be okay?"

Carlisle ignored Emmett's question and instead asked one of his own. He couldn't help but let a bit of his anger drip into voice. "Would you mind telling me what the hell happened?" Carlisle hated to see anyone suffering, especially someone he considered part of his family. This was the first time he had seen Bella in four years, and here she lay, ill and most definitely unexpected.

Edward stepped forward in defense of his friend. "We don't know, Dad. I drove Emmett home and we found Bella by the front door. She was soaking wet, so she must have been there for a while. Emmett had no idea she was coming!"

Carlisle's brow furrowed in confusion as he continued to check Bella's vitals. "Not even a phone call?"

Emmett shook his head vigorously. "I haven't spoken to Bella in over a year." He paused, brushing a hand through his rain-washed hair. "Please, is she going to be okay?"

Carlisle sighed and nodded. "She's very sick. I need a chest x-ray and labs to confirm, but I'm pretty sure she has pneumonia so I'm going to start her on antibiotics now. I'll have to run out and pick them up. In the meanwhile, we need to monitor her temperature and keep her comfortable. When she wakes, we'll get to the bottom of this."

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_AN: Well, there you have it. Please review! Some real reacquainting next chapter! And who knows what else I may throw in there. So…drop me a line…yes, I can be redundant._

_-lmbrtvll_


	3. Chapter 3

Penname: Imbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 3

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

_**AN: Again, I'm sorry for the delay. The chapter got held up in the beta process. And as much as I wanted to post the unedited version, I couldn't do that. The betas do such a wonderful job and I feel naked posting an unedited chapter. So thank you to Project Team Beta (Blakers and Amber Bachmeier) and thank you to those who reviewed! I was blown away by the response, so keep it up!**_

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_**  
**_

**Purple Summer**

**Chapter 3**

_and opens purple summer_

- Duncan Sheik & Steven Sater

Emmett gratefully accepted a steaming mug of hot tea from Esme and pulled Edward's sweatshirt tighter around him in an effort to comfort himself. Carlisle was still with Bella in the guest room. After her fever had spiked and Emmett had panicked, both he and Edward had been banished from the room until further notice. Emmett had never seen Carlisle that stern or demanding before. Nor had he ever once heard him raise his voice, not even when he and Edward broke the porch swing.

Emmett knew Carlisle and Esme loved both him and Bella and were distraught when Renee had taken Bella away, but the scenes unfolding before his eyes still surprised him.

"Dude, do you think I should try calling Renee?"

Edward sat pensively for a moment while Emmett mindlessly began playing with the fringe on the blanket Esme had placed on the couch next to him in case he got cold.

"I don't think you should do anything until Bella wakes up. She's going to be the best person to get answers from Edward finally answered.

Neither spoke after that and had his mind not been so preoccupied with worry for his sister, Emmett was sure he would be fighting to stay awake. He turned his gaze from Edward, who was carefully sprawled out in the cream colored loveseat to the large glass windows to his right. They had a clear view of the surrounding woods. The sky was a rich, soft grey tinged with a hint of gold as the sun struggled to rise and burn through the clouds. The leaves atop the trees in what Emmett had affectionately named Cullen Woods rustled eerily as they were pelted with heavy raindrops. The downpour from earlier had tapered off into on and off showers. Just as he'd done countless times during a study session, mindlessly enjoying the scenery was a nice reprieve from the anxiety-riddled thoughts concerning his sister.

"Emmett." Carlisle slowly descended the stairs into the family room where the boys had planted themselves shortly after being kicked out of Bella's room. Carlisle's normally neatly placed blond hair fell into his face, now creased with worry and exhaustion. His light blue dress shirt was wrinkled and the few top buttons were undone causing the collar to weep slightly. This was most definitely not the Carlisle that Emmet was used to seeing.

"She's coming around. I'm sure she'll feel more comfortable seeing you there."

Immediately Emmett was off the couch and following Carlisle up the stairs to the guest room. Turning around in front of the closed door, Carlisle stopped Emmett.

"Don't stress her, and don't upset her. She's bound to be tired and drained both physically and emotionally. She's not going anywhere; we don't have to find out everything right now."

Emmett nodded his head vigorously; he would do anything to get Carlisle to let him in. Carlisle placed a hand on Emmett's broad shoulder and squeezed it.

"Whatever the reason for her showing up, things will work out. Esme and I will do anything we can to help."

Emmett swallowed the lump in his throat and silently nodded his thanks to Carlisle. Ever since Charlie had passed away a year ago, Carlisle and Esme had stepped in and looked out for him. Even now, moments such as this really had Emmett working hard to not get emotional. He would never truly be able to explain his gratitude to the Cullens.

Slowly, Carlisle opened the bedroom door and stepped aside. Emmett hesitated a moment in the doorway to give his eyes a chance to adjust to the dim lighting of the room.

It nearly shattered his heart to see his baby sister swallowed up in the blankets and pillows of the large four-poster bed. She was so vulnerable and nearly helpless and Emmett was not used to seeing that. They shouldn't be meeting like this; this should be a happy occasion. Summoning his courage, Emmett took a seat in a chair placed strategically at the side of the bed. He took a seat and the chair creaked with his weight causing Bella's eyes to flutter open. The deep brown yet glazed over orbs darted around the room, disoriented. It took a moment before recognition washed over Bella's face when she spotted Emmett.

"Bells." Emmett's voice was grainy and cracked with overwhelming emotion.

Automatically, Emmett's large mitt of a hand reached forward to touch her, to reassure him that she was indeed real and here. But he stopped himself and abruptly dropped his hand in his lap. For the past year Emmett had been planning what he would say to Bella if he ever had the chance to talk to her again. Most of it was pretty rude and insulting. But seeing Bella in person, weak and defenseless with an overall air of despair, shrinking back in fear, caused his speech to deflate and flatten away into the back of his mind.

The anger was still there, there was no doubt about it. Bella had left him, stopped contacting him, pretty much disappeared from his life. But overwhelming his anger was the need to comfort and protect his baby sister; to scoop her up in his arms and kiss it better like he used to do when they were younger. Something must have happened to bring her here, that much was apparent.

"What happened, Bella?"

Bella's nervous fingers twitched and searched for an imaginary flaw in the cream duvet cover in her lap. Her eyes shifted apprehensively and she swallowed back the dryness in her throat.

"Um…" she hesitated. How could she phrase it to keep him from hating her any further? "Renee suggested I leave."

So Bella just softened the edges of the story a little bit, told a small lie. If Emmett knew what really happened, that Renee had kicked her out for wanting to go to college, he would laugh at her stupidity. Mock her even. Just like Renee had.

She examined her brother for the first time since she had arrived, the first time in years really. He was so big. A huge teddy bear of a boy – well, man. His dark hair, the same rich brown shade as Bella's, fell in short boyish curls against his strong forehead. She could see his bulk, his broad shoulders and chest straining against the too small sweatshirt. Even though he was sitting hunched over in the chair next to her bed, she could tell he was tall. His legs resembled tree trunks for crying out loud. And his eyes, oh his eyes. While the rest of him was a true reflection of Charlie, Emmet's hazel eyes were one hundred percent Renee. The only difference was where Renee's were frozen over with disgust, Emmett's were curious, shocked, hurt. She was the cause of that hurt.

Why wasn't he saying anything? Emmett just sat in the chair, staring at her with an intense gaze. Bella's empty heart pounded anxiously in her small chest and she opened her mouth to speak, only to shut it again with nothing to say.

"So," Emmett began tentatively, "You're um, here to stay?"

Bella nearly lost it after hearing that. She hadn't expected her brother to want her, but hearing it still hurt. More than she thought it would. But what was she really expecting? A warm welcome with open arms and a kiss to make up for every year they were separated? Of course not. Who would want her? Who wouldn't see her as a burden and a needy little girl?

She would put him out of his misery, she decided. That decision being made, she threw back the heavy duvet with as much force as she could, an attempt to convey a strength she didn't have, and slung a clumsy leg over the side of the bed. If only the room would stop spinning. She grasped at her chest to quell the sudden ache the new angle brought.

"I'm sorry. God, so stupid." She thrust a fist at her forehead. "I didn't mean to inconvenience you, really. I'll go." She looked around for her clothing, as she most certainly did not travel to Forks in the soft, green silk pajamas she was currently dressed in.

"What do you think you're doing?" Emmett's loud, demanding voice reverberated against the gold walls of the spacious bedroom. Though he didn't mean to yell, he wasn't that surprised. He had a tendency to get carried away with his emotions and the volume of his voice was a good way to measure how he was feeling.

His sister was being dense. She was ill and weak. She shouldn't be getting out of bed. But the moment he saw the cringe in Bella's face and then a surprising flash of recognition, he immediately regretted raising his voice.

"I'm going. I'm getting out of the way." Bella sat back down on the bed as a coughing fit shook her body.

Falling easily into his role of older brother, Emmett pushed Bella back against the mountain of pillows, handed her a glass of water previously left on the nightstand and pulled the duvet over her.

"Like hell you are. Look at you. You can barely stand and you sound horrible. You are in no condition to go anywhere." Emmett was not only concerned due to Bella's poor health, but because she was his sister as well. As awkward and uncomfortable as things may be, he didn't want her to leave.

Bella relaxed back into the pillows with a resigned sigh. "I'm so sorry, Em." Her voice was barely above a whisper, but Emmett heard her.

Emmett's brow furrowed and he rubbed his face for what felt like the millionth time that hour. If he kept it up he'd give himself premature wrinkles. Emmett couldn't get over how much his baby sister had changed. She was different, for lack of a better word, and constantly apologizing. This wasn't the vibrant carefree, exuberant, joyful rosy-cheeked little sister he had grown up with. She practically jumped every time he spoke in a volume louder than a whisper, which for Emmett was all the time. It was clear Arizona had changed Bella and not for the better.

They may have been separated for the past four years but Bella was here and that was what mattered. Emmett would figure this out, this confusing personality change. He would get his sister back.

"Don't be sorry, Bells. I'm just glad to see you, even if it was unexpected. I missed you, kiddo."

Bella's head shot up and she looked startled. Emmett actually missed her? She hadn't heard those words in years. Her vision blurred as hot tears pooled in her eyes. Emmett's form distorted but remained solid as Bella flew to him, throwing her arms around his large shoulders. Burying her face in the crook of his neck, she sobbed without restraint.

_You're so weak. Pathetic. Look at you, you're always crying._ Screw Renee. Emmett missed her.

Emmett slowly rocked Bella back and forth in his arms as a new father would a child. He gently shushed her and pressed his large thumbs to her cheeks to clear the wetness underneath.

Emmett couldn't help but wonder what had happened in Arizona, what Renee had done to have his strong eighteen year old sister sobbing in his arms.

Eventually, Bella's sobs quieted down into sniffles and hiccups allowing her enough control over herself to speak.

"Some reunion, huh?" She threw in a weak laugh in attempts to dissipate the awkwardness hanging heavily in the air. Despite being comfortable in her brother's muscular, yet cushioned arms, the thumping of his heart pounding reassuringly in her ears, she pulled way and climbed back into the oversized bed.

"So, uh." Emmett rubbed the back of his neck apprehensively, "I was thinking you'd uh, come move in with me. Move back home. You could have your old room back. It's just the way you left it. Dad wanted to leave it, just in case you came back."

Bella was speechless. Her hands itched to reach out and grab her brother in a hug again but she resisted. As much as she wanted to make certain she wasn't turning into baggage for her brother she really couldn't bring herself to turn him down.

_Weak._

With all of her willpower Bella threw Renee's sharp and unwanted voice from her head. _God!_ She wanted to be able to think for herself for once.

_But you can't because you're weak and worthless. You'll just become someone else's problem._

_Enough!_ Rubbing her eyes with the back of her palms, she took a deep breath. "I would love to. Thanks, Em."

While her deep breath did wonders for her head, it was the breaking point for the discomfort in her chest as she erupted into an uncontrollable coughing fit. Emmett wearily lifted himself from the chair and walked over to the door.

"Let me see if Carlisle is back with your prescription."

He didn't even give Bella a chance to answer as he went in search of the man whom she briefly remembered seeing hazily floating over her bed earlier. Suddenly exhausted she closed her eyes and allowed sleep to take her.

When Bella woke next the sun could be seen behind the clouds, high in the sky.. She stretched in comfort as she shook the remains of sleep from her body.

"Oh, Bella! Welcome back! I can't believe you're here. We have so much catching up to do!" A blur of a tiny person appeared from nowhere and landed on Bella's bed. Taken aback, Bella scooted away a bit into her pillows observing the porcelain skin, the dark cropped hair and stunning eyes. Four years only intensified the beauty that was Alice Cullen.

"H-hey Alice." Bella didn't know where the unexpected shyness came from, but it hit her full force. She looked down at her currently unoccupied hands and fiddled with them awkwardly. Once Alice discovered what a worthless loser Bella was, would she still like her? Sure, they _used_ to be best friends but she was gorgeous; she probably had a million friends. Bella would just get in the way.

"This is so exciting!" The tiny girl squealed in glee. "When Edward let it slip you were back and staying _here_ I nearly died! I'm definitely going to have to take you shopping and I'll have to introduce you to everyone and…" Bella tried her hardest to keep up with what Alice was saying, but she was tired and it was difficult. She didn't remember Alice being quite this high-spirited when she was younger.

_Back it up a moment. Did Alice say Edward?_ Edward was here and had seen Bella? Bella just wasn't ready for this. Panic set in as she realized she couldn't handle getting reacquainted with everyone quite so soon. She wasn't even sure she _should_ be getting reacquainted with them. She definitely wasn't part of the same crowd as them. Hell, she wasn't part of any crowd.

Sweat prickled her skin and her heart thudded heavily in her chest as the sound of rushing blood filled her ears. The sneaky tentacles of panic quickly wrapped themselves around Bella's neck.

"Alice, dear. I think you should give Bella some space. She's ill. Why don't you go see if your mother needs any help with breakfast, hm?"

Carlisle had perfect timing. _And a perfect face_, Bella thought as she blushed furiously.

"Good morning, Bella. How are you feeling?" Carlisle sat on the edge of her bed and took her wrist in his experienced hand, listening intently as she listed her symptoms.

"Well, I've picked antibiotics up for you. I'd like you to take one pill twice every twelve hours until you've finished the entire bottle. That should clear your chest infection up. Though, I won't even think about letting you leave until tomorrow at the earliest. You're fever should break by then and then we'll really know you're on the road to recovery."

"Thank you, Dr. Cullen. I don't know how to repay you."

The blonde doctor shook his head with a laugh and patted Bella's hand. "Nonsense. And please, call me Carlisle like you used to."

Bella couldn't help but smile back at Carlisle. "Okay, Carlisle." She tested out his name. It was a bit strange, but comfortable at the same time. Maybe she could get used to living here again.

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_AN: Just a heads up, the next chapter is DONE, it's just in the beta process now. So if you send me some love and review I can really push to have the next chapter up asap. _


	4. Chapter 4

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 4

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

_AN: Thanks to Project Team Beta (Blakers and Jmeyer) for finding all the flaws in my chapter and helping me improve. Special dedication to vampiregal94, my self-proclaimed number one fan. Hope you enjoy the chapter. Thanks to everyone for reviewing!_

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Purple Summer

Chapter 4

_~with a flutter of its wings  
_

"She's moving in with me, dude," Emmett blurted randomly. Emmett and Edward were riding in Edward's Volvo, heading to campus for day one of finals week. All things considered, between Bella showing up, asking her to move in _and_ the incredible stress of a full week of finals, Emmett felt he was holding up pretty well. Granted, the Cullens had helped out immensely. Mentally, he was still together and as ready as possible for final number one. He drummed his fingers nervously against his thigh and even Edward's special classical playlist on his iPod couldn't subdue his nerves. He knew this was all just part of the process of finals; taking any type of an exam agitated his nerves. He would feel a thousand times better by one o'clock this afternoon.

"That's great, Em. How do you feel about it?" Edward's voice was unexpectedly cautious. Edward really knew how to suck the air out of you. Sometimes Emmett wondered why he wanted to go into emergency medicine when he clearly had a knack for getting inside someone's head. Emmett liked to push his buttons and tell him quite often that he would be better off suited in the field of psychiatry.

Not receiving any type of answer from Emmett, verbal or not, Edward continued. "Are you happy?" Who knew? Some brother's might resent having their younger sibling move in with them.

"Of course I am, doofus! She's my sister." Edward blocked a large hand heading for his head and laughed.

"Okay, okay. Just thought I'd ask."

The car returned to the quiet melodies of Debussy for the rest of the car ride. Emmett was reciting factoids under his breath and praying that all his studying would pay off. Pulling into a spot in the parking lot, Edward shut off the car but didn't unbuckle his seat belt. He didn't have his upcoming exam on his mind like he knew he should have. But something more troubling was consuming his every thought and until he got it off his chest, he was afraid he would have the concentration of a chipmunk.

"Why won't Bella let me see her?" There, he had done it. He had asked the one question that had been nagging him since he became aware of Bella's strange request. He couldn't understand why someone he considered his good friend would be so adamant against seeing him. But that didn't stop him from seeing her at night while she slept. He would slip into her room when he was sure she slumbered and watch her, listening intently as she called out various meaningless words. He couldn't help but wish that it were his name that was tumbling out from between her plump berry colored lips.

He sighed audibly. This was Emmett's little sister. He really shouldn't be thinking about her like that if he valued his face, or his life. The last time he had seen her, she had been a scrawny, awkward prepubescent girl with a heart of gold. She was his sister's best friend, yet she had wormed her way into his life as well.

And seeing her now, all grown up and filled out, with curves, his arms ached to pull her close and brush his lips against hers. Not that he was even remotely close to having a chance to do that. She wouldn't even be in the same room as him. Edward groaned and then realized that Emmett had yet to answer his question. He looked over at his friend and raised an eyebrow.

Emmett shrugged. "Don't know. She's changed. I feel like something happened in Phoenix, something changed her." He clapped a hand on Edward's shoulder. "Sorry buddy."

Edward gave his friend a smile and unbuckled his seat belt. "Come on, let's go ace some tests."

***

Bella woke to a setting sun and a quiet house. She stretched comfortably in the large bed and rolled over, scrunching her face in disgust. _I really need a shower._ She sighed, her mind in conflict. She had promised Esme she would have either her or Alice help her in the shower or at least chaperone as she still wasn't quite strong enough to make it on her own. But from the silence of the house, and what she remembered Esme sharing with her earlier, no one was home. Carlisle had the night shift tonight and Esme was with Alice in Port Angeles shopping for a graduation gift for Edward.

Emmett was probably at the house right now, but there was no way in hell her older brother was going to help her shower. And did she want to interrupt his studying. She was a big girl; she could shower on her own. She would just have to take it slow.

Throwing a skinny leg over the side of the bed, Bella sat for a few moments, allowing a slight wave of dizziness to pass before standing. She concentrated on slowly putting one foot in front of the other and before she knew it she was standing in front of the bathroom. Success! She quickly stripped off her pajamas and turned the shower on, taking pleasure in the feeling of the warm water as it hit her sticky skin. Never again would she take for granted the ability to shower in privacy. After giving her hair a thorough washing, Bella soaped her body down with a nice, rich layer of freesia body wash.

All too soon the water cooled and Bella could no longer afford to stand under the steady stream of water. She shut the faucet off and grabbed the towel sitting just outside the shower. Wrapping it around her body, she shivered as she opened the shower door and a burst of cool air hit her wet skin.

Bella must have been in the shower longer than she had thought because her legs felt like lead as she maneuvered herself in the shower to dry off a little more. She placed a hand on the tiled wall in an attempt to steady herself as her vision spun. Fighting back a wave of nausea, she stumbled from the shower, her foot catching the lip of the shower tray. She fell forward, her ankle on fire and her hands out in front of her grasping for anything that would keep her upright. Her right hand came into contact with something on the counter and swiped it off. It shattered into shards beneath her and with her luck and grace, or lack thereof, her right hand landed palm down on one of the shards.

She cried out in pain as the sickly smell of fresh blood assaulted her nose, inducing another wave of nausea. _Oh god, not good,_ she thought to herself. She tried breathing through her mouth and pushed the tickle of panic to the furthest corner of her mind. She looked down at her ankle which, which was rapidly swelling as blood rushed to the surface. _Crap._

It was time to push aside her pride and dignity. "Emmett!" Bella called for her brother as loud as she could and half expected him to burst through the bathroom door within a minute of her calling out.

Bella didn't expect a panicked and wide-eyed Edward Cullen to burst through the door instead. His bright green eyes nearly popped form his head as he processed what he had just walked in on. His face reddened to near-Bella proportions and he covered his eyes with a large hand.

Bella looked down and nearly passed out again as she realized just how close to naked she was. The fluffy towel, which was sufficiently large enough to cover someone of Bella's size under normal circumstances, was hanging dangerously low on her breasts and was parted high on her hip giving Edward a nice view of the curve of her bottom. As quickly as she could with one hand, Bella maneuvered the towel to a more modest position. It would be her luck to incapacitate herself somehow and end up with the world's most gorgeous man walking in on her nearly nude.

"Ed-Edward! What are you doing in here?"

"I heard something break and a thud, then you called. I was worried. Are you okay?"

"I yelled for Emmett! And yet you're the one standing in front of me." Bella was furious. What gave Edward the right to barge right in to the bathroom? She had yelled for Emmett. She could've been naked for all he knew and yet he walked right in without even knocking.

"I'm sorry!" Edward threw up his hands in a surrendering gesture.

"Could," Bella looked down, her anger abating leaving her shy and embarrassed. "Could you leave please? I'd like a little privacy."

She expected to hear Edward leave, but he made no effort to even turn around, let alone leave the bathroom. "Edward?"

"You need help Bella." Bella's heart jumped to her throat. Oh God. Did he know? Did Renee somehow tell him or Emmett what a worthless excuse for a human she was? He must know if he thought she needed help. Why else would he say that?

"Ex-excuse me?" Her voice trembled, betraying her and reveling her true emotions to Edward.

"Look at your ankle. I doubt you can make it to your room on your own." She looked down and agreed; it was pretty swollen. She flexed it slightly and found out it didn't just look painful, it _was_ painful. "Let me help you to the bed, okay?"

Bella grimaced and nodded. This was the last thing she wanted, but right now it was her only option. "Fine," she grumbled.

Edward bent down, eyes still politely averted, and pulled Bella up into his arms. She shifted uncomfortably. She didn't want to be helped like this – didn't deserve it. Edward gently placed Bella on the bed and made sure her leg was secure and elevated.

"Thank you," Bella whispered.

"God, Bella! You're bleeding!" As soon as Edward reminded Bella of her newly acquired injury, the nausea returned full force and she moaned. The tugging on her hand drew her attention from her rolling stomach and she snatched her hand away from whatever was touching it.

"Just let me help, Bella. Let me look at your hand." Edward's voice had a pleading quality to it and for a moment, Bella actually believed he wanted to help her for her own sake.

"No. Please. Let me just take care of myself."

That little voice in her head was nagging her. _Don't get used to relying on him Bella. He's not here for you; you're not worthy of his help._ She hung her head with shame; the voice was right.

"Let's start with this shall we?" Something soft rubbed against Bella's arm and she looked up to find Edward holding out a clean pair of pajamas – blue this time. She took them with her uninjured hand and with promises and swears that Edward would turn around and not peek, Bella slipped them on with haste. Only after she was safely sitting back on the bed did Bella let Edward know she was done.

He kneeled in front of her and gently took her engorged ankle in his delicate hands. He frowned a bit while prodding the distended flesh and apologized every time his feather-light touch caused Bella to cry out in pain.

"Well, I don't think it's broken. But we should have my dad look at it when he gets home. I'll be right back; I'm going to grab some ice and the first aid kit."

As much as she didn't want to admit it, Bella loved every moment Edward was touching her. A vicious internal battle was raging between her wants and Renee's malevolent voice. Sadly, Renee was winning. Her body may be pulling her in one direction, may be yearning to feel Edward's strong body close to hers, but a wicked comment would pop into her head at just the right moment and bring everything crashing down. No, there was no way Edward would want her and there was most definitely no way Bella would ever deserve someone like him.

"I'm back. Here, let's get this on your ankle." Edward molded the wrapped pack of ice around Bella's skinny ankle and then moved on to the first aid kit. He pulled her hand from her lap and gently uncurled her finger which she had unconsciously tightened into a fist despite the wound and blood.

"Might I suggest not looking? I don't want you to pass out on me, or worse. If you feel like you're going to be sick, please make sure you're not facing me. I've already showered today." There was humor in Edward's voice but that didn't keep Bella from burning with embarrassment. He was right. Bella's inability to stay calm and nausea-free at the sight, or even the scent of blood was just another failure on her part. Doing them both a favor, Bella reclined on the bed and let Edward position her hand. He chuckled.

"It's nice to see some things haven't changed. You still seem to be as clumsy as ever."

Bella didn't answer, but merely shrugged her shoulders. She turned her face away from the open wound and breathed through her mouth. _Don't throw up_. Those words became her mantra as she repeated them in her head over and over again.

Edward leaned over Bella's palm, carefully inspecting the cut. Most of the bleeding had stopped and there was no trace of glass lingering in the wound. "I'll just wrap this up and have my dad take a look at it as well.

Bella nodded uncomfortably. "Um, thanks."

"Why, Bella?" Bella's head shot up at Edward's question.

"Why what?"

He might as well come out and say it now. "Why have you been avoiding me?"

"Edward, I-,"

Edward cut her off, jumping to his feet. The first aid kit clattered to the floor, the contents scattering across the room. Fear was evident in Bella's wide brown eyes as Edward stood in the middle of the room, fingers clasped on the bridge of his knows, breathing heavily.

"Don't lie to me, Bella. I haven't been allowed to see you, as per your request. Why are you avoiding me? We were – are friends. What happened to you in Phoenix? What happened, Bella?"

Had Bella allowed herself to sneak a better look at Edward's eyes she would have seen the tears pooling in the bright green orbs. She was speechless and frightened. He was yelling at her, turning on her like Renee said everyone would. She cried out with realization, her heart heavy.

Edward looked up when he heard Bella's whimper. His face was one of pure horror, disbelief, sadness. He backed away slowly. "Oh God. Bella, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to make you upset."

He moved towards her, his hands outstretched, palms up, as a peace offering – a sign he wasn't going to hurt her. He reached the bed and instead of kneeling like he had earlier to look at her ankle, he sat down facing Bella. He warmly reached out a hand to cup Bella's face and trace the soft skin of her cheek.

"I feel like you're pushing me away. I just want my friend back. Please, forgive me for hurting you."

"It's okay," Bella whispered, her voice uneven with emotion. "I guess I should be apologizing too. I didn't realize I was pushing you away."

_Yes you did. You did it for a reason you stupid cow. You know you'll never be good enough for him. Might as well cut him out of your life when it's less painful, because you already know you're too weak to handle the pain._

"No, Bella. You have nothing to apologize for."

The slamming of the front door interrupted the tense conversation and Bella was grateful. She didn't know how much longer she could lie to Edward's face. The wall she had built to keep people out was only so strong and even though she had barely seen Edward, he was already chipping away at it. She couldn't let him do that, couldn't let him get close enough to see the repulsive, weak, useless girl she was.

"I bet that's Emmett. He ran to the store earlier." Edward stood and opened the bedroom door. One foot out the door, he turned. "I'm glad you back Bella. I've missed you."

And just like that, the wall crumbled.

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_AN: Chapter 5 is in the beta process now, so hopefully that'll be up in a few days. Please review, I love hearing from my readers. Questions, comments, ideas, thoughts, anything! You make my day!_

_-lmbrtvll_


	5. Chapter 5

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 5

Rating: PG-13

Story Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

_**AN: Thank you for your wonderful feedback. And for being patient with me. Thanks go to Project Team Beta for fixing my numerous errors. Enjoy!**_

* * *

_~the earth will wave with corn_

The majority of the short car ride from the Cullen's house to Bella's childhood home was spent in an awkward silence. Bella clung to the woven seatbelt strapped tightly across her chest as if it were her only hope in retaining any last shred of strength that dwelled within her. She shivered despite the weak heater within the cab of the truck. She was nervous, very nervous. Only early this morning had Dr. Cullen – Carlisle, declared Bella healthy enough to safely leave the confines of the Cullen's home and she did so gratefully. That previous evening was her confrontation with Edward and she couldn't get out of that house and away from him fast enough.

Bella closed her eyes and forcefully willed away the breathtaking images of Edward that plagued her mind. The charming, baby-faced boy that she had sweetly followed around Forks years earlier had developed into a man of beauty. He was masculine yet graceful, the perfect "all-American" guy with a hint of an otherworldly air. His copper colored locks were mussed, he had a hint of stubble along his sculpted jaw, and his striking green eyes left her breathless. She nearly declared her admiration and infatuation with him then and there when his solid arms lifted her from the bathroom floor and carried her to the bed as if she weighed nothing to him. He was her proverbial knight in shining armor.

She shivered as she remembered the feeling of his large gentle hands manipulating her ankle. There was a quiet sense of knowledge behind his movements and a well-implied feeling of concern. Bella ached to be held in Edward's arms again, even if he was only holding her out of concern rather than a romantic feeling. Let's be serious, there was no way a man like Edward Cullen would ever be interested in a scrawny confidence-lacking girl like her.

"What are you thinking about, Bella?" Emmett glanced over quickly, weakly smiling when he saw her face.

"What do you mean?" Bella was confused and a bit hesitant to answer her brother's question.

Emmett chuckled. "You've got a goofy grin on your face. You must be thinking about something special to be smiling like that."

Bella touched her face as if to confirm that she was indeed smiling. Like rays of sunshine in Forks, as quickly as the smile appeared, it disappeared. But it wasn't her smile her mind was imagining, God no. Edward's smile on the other hand was pure magic. If Bella were a believer in any sort of magic, she would believe that Edward's adorable crooked smile could make things happen, make people do things.

She dropped her hand back to her lap and looked downward, slightly embarrassed that her brother had caught her infatuatedly thinking about his best friend. "Oh, um, nothing. Just excited to go home."

Home. The word almost caught in her throat but she forced it out. Would this be home once she became reacquainted with Forks; with her brother? Apparently she would be finding out sooner rather than later because Emmett was pulling into the gravel driveway. Bella had to admit that the white house looked much better, much less intimidating in the daylight. The incredibly green grass of the front and side yards blended in with the green of the surrounding woods. The house was small, much smaller than the Cullen's, but cozy. There wasn't much in the way of landscaping but Bella hadn't expected her brother to do anything of the sort. The only gardening Bella could see was the overgrown hedge of bushes that grew in front of the house beneath the front window.

"Well, here we are. I'll grab your bag." Emmett hopped down from the truck and grabbed Bella's bag from the back.

"Here we are," Bella repeated softly to herself. Bracing herself for the overwhelming wave of emotions that she expected would come with returning to the place where she had had her most treasured childhood memories, Bella followed her brother through the front door of the house. She stopped in the front entrance, mesmerized by how little things had changed. The same woven and worn rug lay beneath her feet covering the old hardwood beneath. It was the same hardwood she had scraped her knee on as a little girl, the same hardwood Emmett had "ruined" by skateboarding in the house.

Peering into the living room, Bella noticed that the furniture was the same. Emmett had repositioned Charlie's grey-blue couch but left everything else, including the flat screen TV, as it was. The one main difference was the walls. Charlie had left them white, too busy and unbothered to paint them. Now they were a light yellow throughout most of the house and to Bella they signified a fresh start. She took comfort in the warmth of the color.

Eventually, she climbed the short flight of wooden stairs up to where she used to sleep. She assumed she would be in the same room, though did wonder briefly if Emmett had moved into Charlie's old room, the master bedroom.

Bella found her brother leaning against the doorframe to her old room, waiting with a grin. "Just like old times, huh?"

Not really. Quite the opposite actually, but Bella wasn't about to tell Emmett that. Looking around the room Bella noticed that absolutely nothing had changed. The walls that she had begged Charlie to paint were still the same sage green, the bed comforter the same eggplant purple. Directly across from her bed stood her little wooden desk with the decorated corkboard hanging above it. As young and childish as this room was, it felt like home. Bella would just make a few changes to modernize and mature the room and things would be perfect. She was thankful that Charlie and Emmett hadn't decided to change or take over her room. Walking in to find that the boys had turned her old bedroom into a home gym of some sort would have broken her completely.

"If you don't like it, we can work on changing some things around for you. Dad and I didn't think we should mess with it." Emmett glanced worriedly at Bella, thinking her silence meant unhappiness.

"It's great, really! Don't worry about it." Bella didn't need Emmett worrying about something as petty as whether or not she liked her bedroom. She was lucky she had one, that she was invited to stay here.

Walking over to her big brother, she wrapped her lean arms around him in an effort to be a good sister. This is what a good sister would do in this situation, right? Letting go of him, she stumbled backward, embarrassed and blushing and shoved her hands in her pockets. "Thanks, Em."

He grasped the top of her head with a large hand and rubbed it, messing up her plain hair. She playfully glared at him with mock anger and attempted to brush the stray locks back into place.

Again, the awkward silent atmosphere returned and both Bella and Emmett could feel it. Grimacing slightly, Emmett retreated to the door frame. "I'm gonna go shower and, yeah, um. I'll let you unpack."

Bella sank down onto the bed, sighing as pent up tension left her body. She rubbed her makeup-free face furiously as anxiety swiftly settled over her. What was she doing here? Not only had she put Emmett in an awkward position, but she'd had to rely on the generosity of the Cullens as well. That was one thing she did not like. People as wonderful as the Cullens shouldn't have to be bothered helping someone as lowly as her. And yet, they'd been forced to because she was Emmett's sister.

Not only that, she had to find a job relatively soon. If she planned carefully, she could get by a little while longer. But all too soon her small savings from working those four years at Renee's would dry up.

Bella spent the rest of the day unpacking the few things she brought with her and rearranging her room. Though she struggled internally with the decision, Bella chose to remove the finger paintings and middle school awards from her corkboard. She felt she was betraying Charlie by removing the documents, which served as proof of a passed, happier life. But it was too painful for her to look at them; seeing those reminders every day and knowing things could never go back to how they were would slowly but surely break her.

It wasn't until her stomach grumbled that Bella realized how long she had been in her room. She had finished everything she wanted to accomplish and was more than ready for a break. She quietly made her way downstairs to the small kitchen to search for something she could use to throw together a quick dinner. Maybe cooking dinner for Emmett would help her feel like less of the burden she felt she was.

A cursory glance in the fridge told Bella cooking dinner might be easier said than done. The only thing she found that was even remotely edible in the fridge was an unopened block of cheese. The pantry proved no better when all she could find was Fruit Loops. She may be quite talented in the kitchen, but even Bella wouldn't be able to create something with cheese and sugary cereal.

At that moment, Emmett came bounding around the corner, phone in hand. "Oh, Bella! I didn't see you there. I just ordered us some pizza. I hope you like pepperoni."

Bella blinked with wide eyes and pushed back the pressure of tears. _So much for not being a burden_, she thought. Willing back her appetite, Bella smiled sweetly at her brother. "Pepperoni sounds great."

She shuffled around the kitchen until she found what looked to be two rarely used plates and a small handful of napkins. She also found slightly dusty glasses and rinsed them. "Can I get you something to drink?"

She wanted to do as much for her brother as possible. Emmett gave her a quizzical look but flashed her a grin. "How about some ice water?"

Bella filled two glasses with water and ice and placed them on the table before heading to the bathroom. She splashed warm water on her face hoping it would somehow clear the jumble of thoughts rolling around in her head. She always felt too tense around Emmett, it didn't matter that he was her brother. Bella wanted to prove so badly to him, to herself that she _was_ worth something, that she could be helpful. She wanted to prove to him that her moving in with him was a _good_ thing, but so far she was failing miserably.

The sound of the doorbell jolted Bella from her thoughts and she hurriedly dried her face and hands. By the time she got to the kitchen, a steaming pizza was sitting in the middle of the table and her hunger returned with a vengeance. Emmett had already piled three slices on his plate and Bella grabbed one before taking a seat at the table. They both chewed in silence for about a minute before Emmett jumped up, clearly restless.

"How about a movie, kiddo?"

Bella's heart swelled when Emmett called her kiddo and she smiled eagerly at him. She was determined to make this, their relationship, work. Emmett waved his hand in a signal to follow him into the living room and I did, plopping down on the cushiony and worn couch.

In Emmett's hands were two DVDs. "What'll it be_, Batman_ _Begins _or _Gladiator_?"

Again he shrugged his shoulders and cocked his head giving Bella a sheepish smile. "Sorry, but I'm definitely lacking girl movies."

Bella threw her head back and laughed heartily for the first time since she arrived in Forks. "_Batman_, please."

After setting up the movie, Emmett settled next to Bella and finished off his three slices. He eventually went back for a fourth and picked up a second slice for Bella, who smiled in gratitude. "Oh, Bella. I forgot to tell you. The Cullens invited us over for dinner tomorrow and a little celebration for Edward and I."

Bella's forehead wrinkled in confusion and Emmett caught on. "Tomorrow is mine and Edward's last day of finals. Carlisle and Esme wanted to have a little barbecue."

Bella knew what dinner at the Cullens meant. It meant taking more charity from them and more worries and questions about her and her well-being. It meant putting up a fake front of happiness and the anxiety that came with knowing you weren't worthy to be in the presence of those around you. The Cullens were a family of perfection and Bella didn't want to ruin that picture with her presence.

She also didn't want to see Edward. She had finally gotten her mind to focus on something other than his handsome face and strong hands. Trying to shut him out and not reveal her utter lack of worth was too much work.

"I mean, you don't have to come if you don't want to," Emmett added, slyly glancing at Bella from the corner of his eye. "I just wanted to let you know and make it clear that you are invited. I won't force you into anything."

Unfortunately for Bella, the need to please and impress her brother won and she found herself answering him without thinking. "That sounds like fun. I'd like to go."

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_AN: More to come! Next chapter is in the editing process and will hopefully be up soon. Expect drama. In the meantime, REVIEW! Feedback, comments, ideas…it's all appreciated. Feed my addiction._

_-lmbrtvll_


	6. Chapter 6

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 6

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

_AN: So the reviews were definitely down the previous chapter, but since I'm feeling generous and I got this chapter back super early, I'm posting it earlier than I anticipated. Maybe I deserve a little reward in the form of a review?_

_Enjoy!_

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~_ the grey-fly choir will mourn_

Bella and Emmett enjoyed the rest of the movie comfortably. Emmett, being the goof ball he was, became thoroughly immersed in the film and had a habit of yelling at the characters on the screen. Bella was caught off guard the first time, unsure of how to react. But after witnessing Emmett continuing to have outburst every so often she couldn't hold in her laughter anymore and would laugh every time he yelled.

Eventually Emmett managed to settle down and restrain himself about half way into the movie. At this point Bella was struggling to keep her drooping eyelids open and her head off her chest. She was fighting internally with herself as to what to do. She liked spending time with her brother and it seemed like they were finally becoming more comfortable around each other. But she was also beyond exhausted right now and longed to curl up in her bed.

Just when she was ready to give in and head upstairs after providing Emmet a heartfelt apology, Bella felt a heavy arm circle her shoulders and pull her towards him. She stiffened for a moment when she found herself to be nestled in her brother's side. Besides the hugs she had gotten from Emmet, Alice and the other Cullens the past few days, Bella was still not used to any type of intimate contact. Renee didn't believe in hugs or kisses or any other expression of caring or love. She believed it made a person weak and therefore took no part in it. By default, Bella wasn't allowed to express how she felt either.

Fitting perfectly into her brother's side, Bella relaxed a bit. This was nice and Bella found the gesture touching. She nuzzled her head closer to Emmett's solid warm body and felt the tension melt away from her body. God, she was so tired. Shutting her eyes for just a minute wouldn't hurt; she could still hear the movie. Feeling more relaxed than she had in years, Bella fell into a peaceful slumber.

When the credits began to roll, Emmet moved to slide his hand from his sister's shoulders. "Come on, Bells. We should get to bed."

Still fast asleep, Bella didn't answer and only slumped further into the couch, her body heavy with fatigue. Realizing his little sister was asleep, Emmett smiled and lifted himself from the couch stretching, and in turn, popping every joint he could in the process. Bending over Bella, he slid an arm under her shoulders and in the crook of her knees, easily lifting her from the couch. She was clearly tired and he didn't have the heart to wake her just to have her walk to her bedroom.

Maneuvering up the narrow stairs, Emmett gently laid Bella in her bed and pulled the purple comforter over her. As soon as she hit the mattress, Bella instinctively curled up into a ball and clutched the pillow under her head. Seeing that Bella was still fast asleep, Emmett headed to his room for sleep of his own.

***

Rolling over in her bed, Bella stretched her muscles, achy from hours of not moving. She let out an involuntary groan as her body slowly awakened. Wiggling her toes, Bella realized she was in her bed, in her room, in Forks. Though her first few days here weren't the best, it felt so good to be back in her childhood bed. The anxiety of hiding from Emmett what Renee already knew, her lack of worth, was still there. But being here gave Bella new hope.

Memories from last night crashed forward from her mind and she cringed. She remembered being comforted by Emmett's large arm on her shoulders. She remembered feeling exhausted and not having the willpower to keep her eyes open. What she didn't remember was climbing into bed or up the stairs for that matter. She groaned as realization hit her. Emmett must have carried her to bed, which would explain why she was still wearing the same clothes from yesterday.

Rolling to her other side, Bella glanced at the clock on her bedside table and nearly jumped from her bed. It was eleven AM! Bella was flabbergasted. She never slept that late, normally because Renee would never stand for it. Half the day was gone and Emmett probably thought his sister was a good for nothing, lazy waste.

Speaking of Emmett, Bella wondered where he was. The house was unusually quiet but his truck was still in the driveway. Confused, Bella wandered from her room and briefly searched the house. Upon entering the kitchen she noticed a piece of paper on the kitchen table – a note from Emmett.

_Bella-_

_Edward and I are at school for our last final. We'll be back around four-thirty. I left the truck for you in case you needed to go somewhere. Keys are in the drawer by the fridge. _

_See you later,_

_Emmett_

_That's right, Emmett had his last final today_. Bella mentally scolded herself for not remembering that and for not getting up earlier and wishing him luck. Some sister she was.

Her rumbling stomach kept Bella from continuing to berate herself. Opening the fridge, Bella was reminded that there was no food in the house and if she wanted something to eat, a trip to the grocery store was in order. But not before a shower. Especially after sleeping in her outfit from yesterday, nothing would make Bella happier than a nice hot shower.

After standing under the steamy stream of water Bella took care to step out of the shower with caution – she didn't want a repeat of last time. She hastily threw on a comfortable outfit, ran a brush through her hair, brushed her teeth and slipped on a pair of flats. Grabbing the keys from the drawer, Bella climbed into the cab of the old red truck nervously. The only driving Bella had done in Arizona was to and from work and school. Renee even went as far as to hold on to Bella's keys to ensure she didn't drive when she wasn't supposed to. The ability to drive wherever and whenever she wanted was slightly overwhelming and Bella had to take a steadying breath before starting the engine.

The freedom Bella felt in the car exhilarated her and she stepped on the gas pedal a little harder urging the old truck to speed up. She grinned and hit the knob on the dashboard to turn the radio on, cringing when her ears where met with a loud blast of country music. _Gosh, Emmett really needs to find something better to listen to. And maybe learn to listen to it just below concert level volume. _

She fiddled with the radio a little more until she came to a generic radio station playing the top hits. A song she recognized came on and Bella soon found herself singing along, unable to stop herself and not really wanting to either. Finally able to let herself go, Bella sang at the top of her lungs taking advantage of this new found freedom.

_Maybe this will work out,_ _Maybe things will start to get better. Maybe someone does love me. _

After waking up in her bed this morning, Bella concluded that Emmett must have brought her up to bed. She remembered Charlie doing that for her when she was younger, and a pang of an unidentifiable emotion struck her heart. Emmett had really been there for Bella since she had arrived. He had cared enough to take her to a doctor, he liked her enough to _want_ her to stay. The tenderness she felt when Emmett held her earlier was sweet and unexpected and confused the hell out of her. She _wasn't_ used to this.

Her mind flashed to a vision of Edward. Worry, concern and most discerning of all, pity, were evident in his brilliant green eyes. Of course, it wasn't love. It was pity. That was the only feeling anyone ever felt for her, even Emmett. He didn't love her. What he was doing for her was out of pity for his weak baby sister.

A blast of a car horn snapped her back to reality, and processing what was on the road in front of her, Bella slammed on the breaks just in time to swerve and narrowly avoid an oncoming vehicle on the other side of the road.

_Not even capable of driving to the grocery store. You're worthless. You don't deserve to be living with Emmett when you can't even manage to make it to the grocery store without a near accident. Go back so no one will have to be subjected to putting up with your sorry ass. _

Bella slammed her head backwards against the headrest of her seat trying to silence Renee's nagging voice. She sighed forcefully and only when she was safely parked at the grocery store did she visibly relax. Nothing would make her relax entirely, not when she had Renee constantly reminding her of her shortcomings.

With her mood ruined, Bella quickly gathered what she needed at the grocery store, paid and left. Balancing the bag of groceries in one hand, Bella maneuvered the house keys to the lock on the front door and turned it only to find the door unlocked. Nervously she stepped in the house and heard the TV on in the family room.

"Hello?" she called out.

"In here, Bella." Emmett replied.

Once her heart slowed to a more acceptable pace she walked to the living room to find Emmett sprawled out on the sofa watching baseball.

"I, um, wasn't expecting you home." Bella shifted the heavy bag in her arms as she questioned Emmett.

"Yep," Emmett popped the 'p'. "I just had my last final. I'm a free man. Edward dropped me off not too long ago."

Just hearing Emmett say Edward's name made her stomach drop. She was glad she had been out. Having to make small talk with Edward in front of Emmett would have been uncomfortable.

Emmett glanced at Bella and noticed the large sack of groceries in her arms. "Do you need help with that?"

"Oh, no. Don't worry about it. I'm just gonna go put everything away." Bella slid away from the living room and into the kitchen and filled the empty pantry and fridge before retreating to her bedroom. She gently shut the door behind her so she didn't alert Emmet and sank down until she was sitting with her knees drawn to her chest. Her stomach was still rolling from the mention of Edward and she rested her left cheek atop her knee. Her fingers drew invisible patterns in the beige carpet and she took comfort in the familiar feeling of the fibers.

Why was it so difficult for her to push this one person away? Why was he trying so hard to get into her life when she clearly didn't want him there? She had lived well enough without pity from others despite everyone insisting on giving it to her; she certainly didn't want Edward's now.

She drew ragged breaths as her eyes glazed over, the house from Phoenix appearing in her mind. She was in the back yard, the dry heat of the Arizona sun baking her skin and burning her eyes.

"_You can do better than that, Isabella. You'll never get anywhere if you don't do better, not like I expect you to anyway. I had high hopes for you, Isabella. I can see now you'll never be the perfect daughter I was supposed to have." Renee stood above Bella as she worked in the flowerbeds, her ungloved hands bleeding from the roses she was cutting back. _

"_It's probably Charlie's fault your as messed up as you are," Renee sneered. _

_Bella sniffled as she felt the tell tale lump in her throat form. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and concentrated on cutting the rose bushes rather than her emotions. But that didn't stop a tear from escaping and landing on her bare thigh._

"_That's enough Isabella!" Renee screeched. "I won't tolerate a daughter who cries. You're useless enough as it is. Stop your sniveling and get back to work." _

_Renee gave Bella's shoulder a rough nudge causing Bella to careen forward and hit the fresh dirt. Not even checking to see if her daughter was okay, Renee stomped back to the house and slammed the door. _

Bella catapulted from the memory with a gasp, her hands trembling as they continued to trace patterns in the carpet. She had come to a decision. No matter how much she wanted to please her brother, she couldn't join him at the Cullen's tonight. She couldn't handle all the stares of pity, nor did she have the strength to put up with and push away Edward. It would be better for everyone if she just stayed home.

She looked down at her hands and watched as they delicately moved through the dense fibers of the carpet. E. D. W. A. R. D.

Immediately she pulled her hands up, balled them into fists and shoved them in her lap. She let out a quiet grunt of frustration. She wanted so badly to thrust Edward from her life, yet she couldn't even keep him out of her mind, consciously or not.

"Bella?" Emmett's booming voice traveled up the stairs to Bella ears and she groaned. She had to face him now and get it over with. She was almost terrified to see his reaction to her telling him she wouldn't be going to the Cullen's.

She stood and straightened out her shirt and hair. Once she was convinced she didn't look like she just had a massive breakdown she headed downstairs to find her brother. He was in the kitchen, a soda can clutched in his massive grip.

"Hey, Bells," Emmett grinned when he saw her enter the kitchen.

"Hey, Em," she began. She wrung her hands nervously and bit her bottom lip. "Listen, I've been thinking. I don't think it's a good idea if I go with you tonight, to the Cullen's."

Emmett cocked his head to the side and raised and eyebrow. "What's with the change of heart, kiddo?"

Bella mentally groaned. Great, now she had to think of an excuse. She really disliked the idea of lying to Emmett after all that he had done for her. "Well, um, they've already done so much for me and well, it's a party for you and Edward and I don't want to intrude…" Bella let her voice drop off.

_That's right. You don't want to ruin the party with your presence. No one wants to be in the company of a loser._ Renee attacked her with full force.

Emmett set his can down on the counter and walked towards Bella. "What are you talking about? You're my sister. Of course I want you there."

Bella took a step backwards, breathing heavy and beginning to panic. "I can't go," she whispered.

"I said you can go, Bella." Confusion was evident on Emmett's face. "Everyone wants to see you; Edward's been asking about you."

Hearing Edward's name was the breaking point. She backed up further and being the clumsy person she was tripped and fell. She didn't even move to get up, she just sat there with her head in her hands, her back rising and falling unevenly with jagged breaths. Her thin fingers intertwined into her messy brown locks and pulled them taut. Faces of pity filled her mind, criticizing voices followed.

"No," she moaned. "I'm not worth it, I can't go. Why would anyone care if I went? Renee was right."

"Bella?" Still at a loss as to what was going on, Emmett crouched down next to his sister. "Bella, please. Talk to me."

As Emmett gently rested a hand on Bella's shoulder, shuddering sobs enveloped her body. Emmett cradled her into his lap and rubbed her back. "What happened in Phoenix, Bells? What happened with Renee?"

Bella only continued to sob and mumble incoherently. She felt her brother tighten his arms around her and she took comfort in having him with her. She was soothed by the gentle rocking motion she felt in Emmett's arms and the circles he was rubbing on her back. She knew she had to tell him about Renee. She was absolutely terrified; Renee would kill her if she found out Bella was saying anything negative about her. But at this point, Bella didn't know what else to do.

"Renee hates me." Bella didn't mean to be so blunt and as emotionally fatigued as she was, she didn't have much say as to what came out of her mouth.

"And she's right, Em. She really is right. I _am_ worthless. I can't do anything right. I don't deserve to be around people like you, like the Cullens."

Emmett pulled Bella away from him in order to look her in the eye. "Don't say that! Renee is an evil woman for telling you that. You're not worthless. You mean so much to me.

Bella jumped from Emmett's arms, her eyes puffy with tears, her face swollen and red. "How can you say that?" she screamed. "Renee told me every day for four years how worthless, how useless, how insignificant and undeserving I am. How could she be wrong? I've never been told anything different! She kicked me out for wanting to go to college for Christ's sake! I'm clumsy, I don't work hard enough. I'm not the beautiful, elegant daughter Renee was supposed to have. I'm a waste of space – a burden. I- I'm…"

Bella swayed a bit as she paused, but held her ground.

"I don't deserve any of this. I don't, I just don't." She was hysterical and sobs choked off the end of her sentence. Bella had never cried this hard before, not even when she left Forks with Renee. Her chest was heaving in panic and in pain and it scared her that there was nothing she could do to relieve it.

Following Bella's actions with his eyes, Emmett got to his feet and walked over to his panic-stricken sister who still stood with her arms around herself in the middle of the room. Again, he took her into his arms and hugged her as hard as he could without hurting her.

Bella let Emmett support her weight and she leaned into him, feeling her tears dampen the shirt beneath her cheek. His large almost clumsy fingers stroked her head and ran through her hair.

"You're my baby sister." He kissed the top of her head and Bella was surprised to hear her brother's strong voice waver with tears. "I love _you_ more than anyone else on Earth. To say you're worthless and undeserving is a lie. You are one of the most deserving people I know. Renee is a horrible woman to say those things and even more horrible to make you believe them."

"I hate myself. God, I'm so messed up." Bella's voice was small and weak. She fisted his shirt and pulled herself closer to him.

"Every day for four long years, I wished that you would call and tell me you were coming back. My life wasn't the same without you hear Bells. You're my best friend, my partner in crime. I _know_ the real Bella, and it's not the one Renee had made you believe you are. You're beautiful, you're kind and caring and intelligent."

Emmett paused and drew a resounding breath that Bella heard fill his chest. "Please listen to me when I say Renee couldn't be any further from the truth. Trust me. I want you here and couldn't be happier you've moved in with me."

A red-eyed Bella looked up at her brother. "Really?" she croaked.

"Of course. You're stuck with me, kiddo. I love you."

Bella hiccupped and buried her face deeper into Emmett's shirt. "Love you too, Em."

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_AN: Like always, I'll start off by begging for reviews. I can't stress enough how valuable your input is to me, it gets me writing faster than a cup of coffee (which I'm addicted to). Favorites and alerts are nice, but reviews are GOLD. Review please._

_-lmbrtvll_


	7. Chapter 7

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 7

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

**_AN: Tough chapter, I hope I did it justice. Thank you to Project Team Beta for fixing my atrocious grammer and horrible comma usage. _**_**And thank you for your reviews. I've been going through a tough time and getting your reviews not only gives me a sense of validation, it also really brightens my day. So thank you.**_

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_~ and mares will neigh, with stallions that they mate, foals they've born. –duncan sheik_

Bella hadn't felt this happy in a long time, even with her pervading sense of failure. With her dramatic breakdown and full confession to Emmett came almost-instant relief. She didn't have to worry about hiding those four years of her life from her brother anymore. But with this new sense of relief came a whole new sense of sadness and a minor depression had settled over her. Emmett was now very aware what a complete failure his sister had turned out to be.

Bella made Emmett not to breath a word of what had transpired between the two of them to the Cullens. Telling Emmett had been hard enough; Bella didn't think she could handle having the Cullens find out how ruined she was.

At Emmett's suggestion, Bella had stepped into the bathroom to wash away her tears. She changed her shirt, washed her face and brushed her hair. She had to admit that she did feel more renewed as she headed downstairs to the kitchen.

Emmett was resting against the counter, eating a banana when Bella came in. He waved at her as she clumsily trotted into the kitchen to lean against the counter opposite him. Emmett finished off the banana, tossed the peel in the trash and eyed Bella.

"Are you sure you don't want to join me tonight?" He raised his eyebrows expectantly at her. "There's someone really special coming who'd I'd like you to meet."

Bella groaned and rubbed her forehead with a frown. "Em, I really don't think it's a good idea. I mean…" She trailed off and stared at Emmett's ridiculously overdone pout.

"That's not going to work on me."

Bella crossed her arms and tried to look defiant, but she couldn't hold back the smile that soon graced her face.

"Fine!" she laughed. "I give in. I'm just really nervous, so please don't ditch me."

Emmett playfully ruffled Bella's hair and kissed her cheek. "I promise I won't, kiddo. Thanks."

Bella waited patiently as Emmett ran upstairs to shave and change his shirt. Her hands gripped the counter behind her as she struggled to steady herself. She could feel the heavy pounding of her heart in her chest. Each breath seemed monumental as she struggled to draw thick air into her starving lungs and a deep feeling of unease settled within her. She tried to replay Emmett's words in her mind, but all she could hear were whispers and snippets of what he had said. Renee's ugly and unwanted voice would always have a scathing retort, even though Bella tried as hard as she could to banish the it.

By the time Emmett had arrived back in the kitchen, Bella was near tears with apprehension and unease. Her stomach rolled in waves of apprehension and it took will power she hadn't known she had not to curl up right there on the kitchen floor.

"All ready, kiddo? We need to leave a little early so I can stop off at the store and pick up snacks. Wouldn't want to show up empty handed." Emmett grabbed his keys from the drawer and tilted his head at Bella in question.

Not trusting her voice, Bella nodded silently, grateful Emmett seemed oblivious to her worry. She put herself in charge of locking the house door so her mind would have something to concentrate on other than her fears. Walking over to the old truck, she let her ears focus on the sound of the gravel beneath her feet as she tried to breath deeply to calm her racing heart. Emmett unlocked his car and she slid into the passenger side of her brother's truck and buckled up with shaky hands. She remained silent for the duration of the car ride and agreed to wait in the car while Emmett ran into the store.

As she waited alone, Bella found the silence deafening, so she turned on the radio. The languid vocals of Norah Jones filled the small cab and Bella smiled to herself. When she and Emmett had younger, Emmett would always tease Bella without mercy. That was, until Bella learned how to play dirty.

_Bella sat in her room, trying hard to concentrate on her math homework. She was in the sixth grade and eager to begin her middle school career with straight A's. She tapped the eraser end of her pencil against her work sheet as she tried to make sense of the black numbers before her eyes. Bella liked to think of herself as rather intelligent, but Mr. Young, her math teacher, was moving very fast. It didn't help that she had been placed into the advanced math class, where all the material was new. What she wouldn't give for a review of something she had already learned, just to get her confidence back. _

_Unfortunately, just as Bella was starting to understand the mess of numbers on the worksheet, Emmett's loud and off-pitch voice carried into her room from the bathroom. Emmett didn't usually sing in the shower unless he was excited about something. Bella rolled her eyes as she realized what that something was - Emmett had a house date tonight. Now a sophomore in high school, Emmett was itching to start dating, so Charlie had come up with a new rule that allowed Emmett to do so with supervision. Thus came the house date. Charlie got his reassurance that nothing inappropriate was happening, and Emmett got to date. _

_If Charlie was this strict with Emmett, Lord knew, how he would be when Bella started dating, if he even let her. _

_But at the moment, that was the furthest thing from Bella's mind. She had absolutely no interest in the opposite sex. All she wanted was to finish this stupid worksheet. Bella thought that relief would come with the sound of the shower being shut off but she was wrong. Emmett continued his agonizing rendition of whatever opera he'd secretly been listening to as he ran around upstairs getting ready. _

_"I'm going on a daaate. I'm going on a daaate." Emmett's singsong voice cut into Bella's concentration like a knife. Sighing, she flopped backwards on her bed and pushed her worksheet to the side. Emmett really needed to learn that his baby sister could fight back, and maybe he'd think twice before teasing her in front of his friends. _

_Jumping up from her bed, Bella fingered through her CD collection. She needed the perfect song if her plan was going to work. Just as Bella heard Emmett step back into the bathroom to shave what little hair he had growing on his face, her fingers found the CD she was looking for. _

_She grinned in anticipation as she snuck into Emmett's room. She scampered over to his desk where his CD player lay and replaced his Rascal Flatts CD with the one she had brought from her room. As quickly as she entered, Bella ran from the room and eased her door shut, lounging on her bed as she waited for the show to begin. _

_Bell picked up her math worksheet and pretended to work on it. At the sound of the doorbell, She smiled and suppressed a giggle. It wasn't until she heard her brother lumbering up the stairs that she put her work down and listened in anticipation. _

_"And this is my room. Wanna check it out?" Emmett was clearly trying to hide the excitement in his voice, but was failing miserably. _

_Bella rolled her eyes when she heard a feminine giggle in response to Emmett's question. She wondered which fake blonde he had brought home this time. _

_She could hear their footsteps circle the room as Emmett held the official tour, as if there was much to see. _

"_Is this the new Sony CD player? It's totally awesome!" _

_Bella cringed when she heard Emmett's date speak for the first time, her voice saccharine and overly flirty. Could she be anymore obvious?_

_Bella could just picture Emmett smirking in satisfaction as his date fawned over his pride and joy, the new CD player he had saved up for months to buy. _

_"It sure is. Wanna listen to something?" Bella laughed as Emmett attempted to flirt back. This was better than the soap operas her friends moms watched._

_Bella was tempted more than once to begin a little countdown in her head but refrained, muscles tense as she waited for the big finale. _

_Garbled music floated from Emmett's room into Bella's. "What the…" he spluttered, "this isn't my CD!"_

_Bella collapsed into a fit of hysterics as Norah Jones' "Turn Me On" blasted from Emmett's fancy CD player. She could hear Emmett trying to calm the now-flustered girl in his room. _

_"Really, it's not my CD! Don't leave!" Emmett ran down the stairs, presumably after his date. Ten minutes later, Bella could hear Emmett return, his feet heavy on the stairs. He didn't bother knocking before opening her door. _

_"Nice to see you're learning. But don't think this doesn't mean I won't be getting you back. This means war, baby sister."_

"We're here, Bells." Bella jumped in her seat and nearly hit her head on the window when Emmett spoke. She had been so wrapped up in her memory that she didn't even notice Emmett get back in the car, or the rest of the drive over, or Emmett changing the radio back to bad country music.

Box of cookies in hand, Emmett jogged around to the other side of the truck and opened Bella's door. With an old fashioned flourish, he offered her his hand to help her down. Bella chuckled at the goofiness of her brother and, for a moment, was tempted to keep hold of his hand. But she didn't want to risk looking weak and shoved her hands beneath her arms as she pulled them across her chest.

As they made their way to the front door, Bella stayed behind Emmett, letting his huge body shield hers from anyone who might be peeking out the front window. She felt like time was moving in slow motion as she watched Emmett reach for the doorbell. The chimes sounded unusually loud to her ears, taunting her, warning her of what was to come.

The urge to turn around and run was powerful, and she was tempted to grab the keys from Emmett and tell him to get a ride back from one of the Cullens. If only she had convinced Emmett to let her stay home. She wasn't strong enough for this.

"Emmett! Bella! Come in!" A beaming Esme opened the door before Bella had the chance to act on her thoughts. She ushered them both into the exquisite Cullen home with a hug.

"Congratulations, Emmett. We're so proud of you." The willowy honey-haired woman stood on her tiptoes and placed a maternal kiss on Emmett's cheek.

"Esme, dear, at least let them get in the house before you fawn over them." Carlisle, looking every part the proud father, appeared in the doorway to the living room. He extended an arm to Emmett and pulled him into an embrace before gently patting him on the back.

Bella shifted uncomfortably as Carlisle walked over to greet her next. "I'm so glad you joined us, Bella. How are you feeling?"

The unnerving tentacles of anxiety slowly crept their way up Bella's spine but she pushed them away and forced herself to smile. "Much better. Thank you for all you've done."

Bella stiffened as Carlisle drew her into his arms and hugged her.

"It was no trouble. I think I speak for all of us when I say that it's wonderful to have you back in Forks with us. Now, why don't we go join the others on the patio outside?"

Bella followed Emmett outside, and a small smile graced her lips as her face came in contact with the sun she had missed so desperately. But being in Forks with Emmett was worth not seeing sun most days of the year.

Looking around, Bella noticed some new faces mingling with those she already knew. Edward was standing in all his glory at the grill, looking casual in jeans and a fitted t-shirt, his broad shoulder muscles flexing and contracting as he flipped burgers. The sun danced across his locks when he moved his head, and the copper color seemed to come alive. She longed to run her fingers through his constant bedhead. There was no use thinking about that, though. What would someone like him want with someone like her?

Upon seeing Bella, Edward grinned, and he waved his free hand at her. Bella could feel the scarlet heat rise in her cheeks and returned the wave before turning back to Emmett.

_Who was that?_

In Emmett's thick arms was the most gorgeous woman Bella had ever seen; she was absolutely breathtaking. Her blond hair was thick and flowed in perfect waves down her back. She was tall, the top of her head reaching just above Emmett's shoulders and her legs seemed to go on for miles. Her face was that of perfectly sculpted beauty. The girl had flawless skin and her eyes were a stunning blue, framed by thick lashes. Just being in the presence of this undoubtedly perfect woman made Bella feel hideous in comparison.

"Bells, I this is Rosalie, my girlfriend. Rose, this is my baby sister, Bella."

Immediately, Rosalie pulled herself free from Emmett's arms and walked over to Bella with an air of confidence Bella could only dream of having.

"It's so wonderful to finally meet you. Emmett's always talked about you. You're even prettier than he described."

Bella's jaw nearly dropped. Rosalie had just called her pretty, and as much as she appreciated the unexpected comment, it made her very uncomfortable.

_You're not the beautiful, graceful daughter I was supposed to have_, Renee's voice whispered in her mind.

"It's nice to meet you, Rosalie," Bella responded, realizing she and Emmett were still waiting for her to say something.

"Come here, Bells. I want you to meet one of my best friends." Emmett grabbed Bella's hand and gave it a little squeeze and bent down to speak only so that she could hear, "you're doing great."

Straightening up, he pulled Bella over to the large, wooden patio table where Alice and a blonde man were sitting. _Does everyone here have to be freaking gorgeous?_

"Hey, Bella! Come have a seat." Alice patted the chair on her right, and Emmett pulled it out for Bella.

"I'm really glad you're here. I can't tell you how much I've missed you. But before we catch up, let me introduce you to my boyfriend, Jasper."

Ah, so the gorgeous blond had a name. His golden hair fell in unruly waves, edged his sculpted face. His eyes were a warm and piercing blue and even though they were sitting, Bella could tell Jasper towered over her little friend.

"Hey, there. It's great to meet you."

Bella could've lost herself in Jasper's smooth southern drawl if she hadn't been so on edge.

"Likewise, Jasper." She tried to appear confident and casual, but inside she felt like she was drowning.

"So, what are your plans for next year, Bella?"

A jolt of panic ran through Bella as she realized she didn't have an answer. She couldn't tell them she didn't have any plans without telling them about Renee, and she definitely couldn't do _that._

"Oh, um." Bella swept her gaze down to the decorative concrete patio. "I'm not sure yet. Things got a little complicated with my move." She stopped talking and hoped her brief explanation would satisfy Alice and Jasper.

"Oh! You should think about applying to Seattle. I'm going there next year, and it would be great to have you there with me! They have rolling admissions so you don't have to worry about a deadline. Just think about it." Alice was nearly bouncing out of her seat with energy. Bella loved how her small friend would throw herself into something heart and soul, no matter how trivial.

Bella listened as intently as she could while Alice explained all the different areas of study at Seattle University. Alice planned on studying fashion merchandising while Jasper, now a senior there, was finishing up a degree in psychology.

"I'll definitely think about it, Alice."

Slightly more relaxed, Bella leaned back in her seat and took in the couples surrounding her. Through the sliding glass door, she could see Esme and Carlisle lovingly working together in the kitchen. Emmett and Rosalie were sitting on a garden wall. Rosalie was sitting in Emmett's lap and tenderly stroking his cheek as they shared what looked to be an intimate conversation. Alice and Jasper, just to Bella's left, were quietly holding hands. The connection between the two of them was almost tangible, and Bella envied them.

Nothing could stop the slight ache in her heart that throbbed each time she realized how lonely she was. She craved companionship, a relationship with a man who loved her. But could anyone love her? Could anyone want to be with someone so plain and clumsy? Someone unwanted by her own mother? Doubt plagued Bella's mind, and she turned her head away in an effort to look at something other than the romantic couples.

"Burgers are done!" Edward's melodic voice interrupted her internal battle and caused her to jump at the unexpected intrusion. Not ready to join the crowd at the grill, she stayed seated at the table, tracing the knots of the wood with her fingers.

"May I interest you in a Cullen creation?"

The velvet voice floated down in a simple melody to her ears, and Bella gasped slightly in surprise. She looked up to see Edward grinning down at her, a full plate balanced delicately in his hand.

"A Cullen creation?" Bella's voice squeaked out of her throat like a pre-pubescent teenage girl drooling over her best friend's older brother. Oh, wait. She _was_ drooling over her best friend's older brother.

Edward took the unoccupied seat next to Bella and plopped the loaded dish down in front of her.

"Oh, you're in for a treat."

Bella noticed Edward's eyes were sparkling, and her heart stuttered in her chest for a moment.

"It's one of my famous handmade burgers, topped with hand-whipped ketchup and mayo, sprinkled with a dash of chopped garlic, onions, cheese and a jalapeño. All sandwiched between a toasted sesame bun."

_Bun. Edward Cullen just said bun. _

Instantaneously, Bella stopped the internal dialogue. There was no use in her pining over what she would never have, the dazzling Edward Cullen. But there was that little dagger of hope that speared through all of her negative thoughts. He _did_ just bring her a burger. That had to stand for something.

_Why would that mean anything, Isabella? As if a disgrace like you could land anything even remotely similar to a man like him. Think again._

Sadness clouded her mind as Renee's voice sneer hurtful words. Bella meekly reached out and took the burger, offering a whisper of a thanks to the gorgeous man she longed to be with. She took the overstuffed burger with both hands and lifted it towards her mouth when she noticed Edward was still sitting next to her, watching.

"Um, this was for me, right?" Bella's cheeks already flamed with heat in preparation for the humiliation that seemed imminent.

Edward chuckled softly, and Bella nearly melted. "Of course, silly. I just wanted to make sure you enjoyed it."

With Edward's blessing of sorts, Bella took a hefty bite. She chewed thoughtfully and swallowed, looking Edward dead in the eye. For a moment, confusion marred his beautiful face.

"Did you not like it?"

Bella brightly grinned at him with a newfound and unexpected confidence. "It's delicious. Thank you."

Edward leaned forward in his chair and rested a hand on Bella's arm. She stiffened at the contact. Where their skin met, Bella could feel the tingling of a powerful energy, and the surrounding skin burned in thirst for contact.

"Everyone around the table!" Esme's voice interrupted the moment, and a startled Edward pulled his hand away.

Bella almost groaned at the loss of contact and yearned to nestle close to the bronze-haired god. Remembering who he was, Bella's heart sank in her chest. That was right, he was too good for her. Why did she have to be teased and taunted with what she couldn't have? Her arm already ached to have Edward's hand upon it again, yet she knew that would probably never happen.

Everyone gathered around the table, and Carlisle placed a large sheet cake bearing the words 'Congrats Edward and Emmett', in the center of the group. The Cullens really did know how to celebrate. To Bella, this seemed more like a birthday celebration than a graduation barbeque, complete with a birthday cake.

_Birthday cake. _

Bella remembered it all too vividly, and with the overwhelming images that filtered through her mind came uncontrollable panic. Away. She needed to get away. Her eyes frantically searched the table for the one person that meant safety, her brother. Her vision was beginning to cloud, making it difficult, but she finally recognized his bulky form at the far end. Even in her panic she could recognize that all his attention was on the beautiful woman in his lap. Her safety net was gone. A wave of nausea overtook her, and Bella jumped from her seat. She needed to get out of there. She ran blindly through the house until she came to a bathroom. She closed the door behind her and sank to her knees on the plush bathroom rug, her heart pounding wildly in her chest.

_It was one of the last days of summer break before Bella would be starting high school. It was also her fifteenth birthday, and she was so excited. She loved her birthday. Every year, Charlie and Emmett would attempt to make breakfast for Bella. Following the breakfast ritual, they would each kiss her the same amount of times as her age and place the birthday crown on her head. It was then up to her to choose what they did for the day, and each year she chose the same thing. They would take a short hike in the woods and upon returning home, gorge themselves on junk food and birthday cake, then watch Pippi Longstocking. _

_This year, Bella didn't know what to expect. So far, Renee hadn't mentioned anything. Nervous, Bella headed downstairs to find her mother and see what her plans were for the day. Just as she expected, Bella found Renee at the kitchen table with a newspaper, her lips creased into a frown as she read. _

_"What do you want, Isabella?" _

_Bella looked down and shuffled her feet nervously, already anxious at her mother's tone of voice. "Well, today's my birthday and…" She trailed off. _

_"And?" Renee's shrill voice reverberated throughout the kitchen. "Are you expecting something? What, do you want a party? A cake? Why would I do that for you? You don't deserve any of it." _

_"But Dad-"_

"_Enough about your father. You're living with _me,_ and I'll do as I see fit. I don't want to hear another word about your birthday. Go do the laundry, and be sure to clean the bathrooms. I expect them to be spotless when I get back." _

_A lone tear slipped down Bella's youthful cheek before she had a chance to wipe it away. _

_A bony hand grabbed her upper arm and yanked. "No crying, Isabella. You're only showing how weak you are. No daughter of mine cries." Renee released Bella and left the house, leaving Bella to begin her chores. _

_After what felt like hours, Bella heard the garage door rumble open and a car door shut. Footsteps could soon be heard in the kitchen, but Bella didn't risk stopping. She didn't want to give Renee any reason to be angry with her. _

_"Isabella, get out here." _

_Bella left the rag on the floor and walked to the kitchen as fast as she could. She could tell Renee was in a bad mood and would not appreciate being kept waiting. What she found in the kitchen, however, scared her. On the table was an eight inch round cake with the words 'Happy Birthday' scrawled across the top in bright red icing. A single fork lay next to it. _

_"Take a seat." Renee pointed to the chair. _

_Bella did as she was told. _

_"Well, what are you waiting for?" Renee spat. "You wanted a birthday cake. Here it is. Eat it." _

_Bella sat frozen in the chair, not quite believing what she was hearing. _

_"Do as I say, Isabella. Eat the cake. All of it." _

_After the fifth bite, the sugary icing was making Bella sick, and after the eleventh, she didn't think her stomach could take anymore. At the slightest hint of resistance, Renee would bark orders in Bella's ear. Each bite felt like lead, and more than once, Bella had to breathe deeply to keep the cake down. As soon as the last bite made it safely past her lips, Bella was out of the chair and running to the far bathroom. She laid in front of the toilet the rest of the night, vomiting up the cake. _

_"Stupid girl. Thinking anyone cares about her birthday." _

_That was the last birthday Bella ever had._

A strong surge of nausea had Bella on her knees in front of the toilet. She could almost taste the sticky, sweet icing of the cake Renee had forced down her throat, and she gagged again.

"Bella?" There was a gentle knock on the door. "Bella, let me in. I want to make sure you're okay."

Her stomach did a summersault as she realized the voice didn't belong to the person she had expected to hear.

"Go away. I'm fine." _Someone as amazing as you has better things to do._

"Bella, you're not fine. I heard you. Please let me in." The voice on the other side of the door was near pleading.

A sob escaped Bella's throat and she broke down again, ashamed and embarrassed. _Who the hell freaks out over cake?_

Even saying the word in her mind brought a fresh wave of nausea, and Bella was again on her knees, leaning over the toilet.

"Bella!" The voice was worried now.

"It's unlocked," she whispered.

Copper hair appeared first and then Edward's face, wrinkled with worry. Concern clouded his emerald eyes. Immediately he knelt by Bella and pushed back her hair with a gentle hand.

"Hey there," he soothed. "What's going on?

Bella was trembling and she couldn't tell whether it was a physical side effect or if it was because Edward was touching her again. She couldn't look him in the eye and instead fixated on the tile floor she was kneeling on.

"Nothing. I'm okay."

She prayed silently that he would just leave her be. She didn't know if she could handle his pity right now. But part of her, a more adventurous and confident part, didn't want him to leave. That Bella wanted Edward to take her in his arms and hold her tight. She wanted to hear his heart beat beneath her ear, she wanted to inhale his unique and intoxicating scent, she wanted to run her hand through his penny-colored hair.

"You're not okay." Edward's voice was gentle and caring. He continued to stroke Bella as he examined her with worried eyes.

"Just a bad memory. It's nothing. Really, I- I just need to get home."

Bella couldn't tell Edward the real reason she had panicked. He would think she was crazy, and he'd be scared away. That was the last thing Bella wanted to do. She was coming to enjoy the short moments she had with Edward and didn't want to do anything to jeopardize them.

Edward moved from Bella, and for a moment, she thought she might have hurt his feelings or something. Instead, he filled a glass with water and dampened a washcloth. He handed the glass to Bella, who drank gratefully. When she was finished, Edward took the glass from her and put it back on the counter before wiping her tear-stained face with the damp cloth.

"Bella, I-" A shrill beeping filled the house, followed by Esme's voice calling for Edward. He swore under his breath and ran a tense hand through his messy hair.

"I'm sorry. I've got to go. Can we meet up for coffee soon?"

Bella was taken aback by Edward's request; it was really one of the last things she had expected to hear from him. She nodded mutely, unable to form a coherent sentence, and with her answer Edward darted from the bathroom.

Once she was certain she looked somewhat decent, Bella herself emerged from the bathroom.

"Bells! There you are! Are you okay? Edward said he was going to check on you, but…" Emmett made a strange motion with his huge fists.

"I'm fine Em. Just a bad memory." Bella saw Emmett's eyes immediately darken, and she assumed he knew what she was referring to. Bella grabbed his arm tightly and gave it a little squeeze.

"I'm okay now. I'd just – would it be okay if we went home now?"

"Of course, kiddo." Emmett kissed the top of her head protectively and led Bella over to the area of the patio where everyone had congregated.

"I think we're gonna head out now. I'm beat." Bella could have kissed Emmett for taking the pressure off her.

Hugs were exchanged and promises made to get together soon. Bella handed her number out not only to Alice, b, , , ut to Rosalie as well. She was nervous that either person would call, but she would look like a complete fool if she refused to share her number. Besides, they were just being polite. They probably wouldn't call her unless they absolutely _had_ to.

_Of course they're not going to call, Isabella. Why would they willingly want to spend time with you? You should be on your knees groveling for their friendship. _It was the same tone of voice Renee had used the night of Bella's birthday, and she shuddered in disgust. She pushed Renee away, she didn't want to deal with her now. Not when they were so close to leaving.

"Hey, Em. Where's Edward?" Bella wanted to thank him for his kindness, no matter how based out of pity it was. She almost felt as if she could trust Edward, and while that scared her, it gave her a sense of exhilaration.

"Oh, he got a call. He's a volunteer paramedic at the local station, and he was on call tonight. That reminds me, he asked me to give you this."

Emmett rummaged around in his pocket for a minute before coming up with a folded piece of paper. Bella took it from her brother and kept it folded, tucking it away safely in her own pocket. There was no need to read whatever Edward had written in front of everyone. If there even was anything on the piece of paper. She would do it in the confines of her own bedroom.

Hand in hand, Bella and Emmett left the Cullens', and after a bit of pressuring from Emmett, Bella shared her memory of the cake incident. Bella noted in worry how Emmett grasped the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white and set his jaw rigidly. By the time her story was over, they were sitting in their driveway. Emmett hastily wiped a tear from his cheek and turned to his sister.

"I promise you, Bells. I won't let Renee near you ever again."

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_AN: Tell me what you think, I struggled with the chapter. Your comments are cherished and I love hearing your ideas; they really really help me. So REVIEW! Nothing makes me happier. _

_-lmbrtvll  
_

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	8. Chapter 8

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 8

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

_**AN: Let's just say I had some real life inspiration while writing this chapter. I managed to run into ROBERT PATTINSON and nearly died from happiness. No, I didn't physically run into him, he was across the street. But I SAW him, was feet from him, he was filming for like a week at my school...in one of my classrooms from last semester!! It made my life, seriously. That boy is gorgeous. **_

_**On a side note, it's awards "season"...hint hint wink wink. Thanks to Project Team Beta for fixing all of my mistakes. And thank you thank you thank you for your wonderful review! Reading what you guys have to say truly makes me happy. **_

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_~and all shall know the wonder of purple summer_

The paper that sat in Bella's hands was worn and soft from being folded and unfolded so many times. Bella had lost count how many times she had read the letter from Edward, but a slight thrill coursed through her veins each time. She could hear his smooth, musical voice whisper those few sentences in her ear, just as he had the night he found her in the Cullen's bathroom. She shivered in delight as she imagined the feeling of Edward's hot breath on her neck as he soothed her.

Careful not to tear the paper, Bella unfolded the note and read it again.

_I'm here to listen. Call me anytime, day or night. _

_Looking forward to coffee with you._

_-Edward_

It had been three days since Bella and Emmett had been at the Cullen's, three days since Edward had been called away leaving his incomplete sentence hanging in the air. Bella hadn't called him yet; she really hadn't felt the need to. She also didn't think she had the courage to do so. She was terrified she would call him, only to freeze up as soon as she heard his voice. Or worse, she would share the terrors in her mind and Edward would run screaming from her.

Bella groaned and threw herself backwards on her bed. She hated how out of control she felt when it came to Edward. He was a force to be reckoned with. Whenever he was near, she was no longer accountable for what she would say or do. Not being able to trust herself scared Bella. One slip of the tongue and her whole past could be spilled to Edward and he'd see the weak girl beneath the façade.

The buzzing next to her head pulled Bella from her disorderly thoughts. It took Bella a moment to figure out where the vibrations were coming from and locate her phone. She wasn't used to the idea of her own cell phone and told Emmett it was unnecessary, but he had insisted on purchasing it for her. He had claimed he needed to be able to contact her and, that practically everyone with the ability to dial a phone number had one nowadays.

He had also surprised Bella with a laptop of her own. It wasn't anything fancy, but it was new and working and all her own. Emmett spent the better part of half an hour trying to convince Bella that he _wanted_ to get the laptop for her and that she shouldn't be feeling guilty.

The little screen on the front of her phone told her that someone named Edward was calling. _Edward was calling!_ Adrenaline surged through Bella's veins as she realized just who exactly was making her phone vibrate. With fumbling fingers, she picked up the phone and flipped it open, pressing it to her ear.

"He-hello?"

"Hey Bella. It's Edward Cullen." Bella's hearted tattooed a rapid rhythm against her chest as Edward's smooth voice caressed her ears.

"Listen, I didn't get a chance to say goodbye to you properly. I'd like to take you out for coffee like I promised. How about I pick you up at two?"

Bella glanced to her clock and noticed it was already noon. She'd have to pull herself together in two very short hours. Her want to see Edward again overpowered any rational thinking and she found herself saying yes.

"I'm looking forward to seeing you. Goodbye, Bella."

"Bye, Edward." Bella hung up her phone with a slight squeal. It was only coffee and she knew Edward was only doing this because he was a gentleman and wanted to apologize for his hasty exit the other night, but she couldn't help getting excited.

Trying to focus her mind on something other than Edward, Bella flitted over to her laptop and signed in to her old email address. Renee had been forced to purchase Bella a laptop for school. Granted, it was a used and beaten up monster of a machine, but it worked and it had internet. So Bella created her own email address, should anyone need to contact her. It was a shame she didn't know Emmett's email address or she would have contacted him as soon as her account was set up.

Bella wasn't surprised when she saw she had no new messages. Looking back, Bella didn't remember ever getting a message. She was tempted at one point to sign up for some random website just to see her mailbox fill up a bit, but had decided against it.

Bella checked the clock on her computer and sighed. She still had ten minutes left until Edward was supposed to pick her up. What she wouldn't mind was a nice tall glass of cold water. But Emmett was downstairs and he had invited Rosalie over. Bella didn't want to intrude on them and whatever they were doing. The last thing she wanted to do was to make Emmett regret asking Bella to move in. She also wanted to brush her teeth before she left and the only bathroom was downstairs. What the hell, she'd just quietly sneak downstairs and into the bathroom. No one would even notice.

It wasn't until she got to the fourth step from the top that Bella heard voices, and both were male. She sat down gingerly to make sure the step didn't creak and rested her head on her knees to better listen.

"Edward, you're my best friend, practically my brother. And I trust you; you're a good guy. But if you do anything to upset Bella or hurt her, I'm going to have to hurt you."

Emmett stopped speaking and Bella assumed the deep mumbling she was hearing was Edward's response. If only he talked as loud as Emmett, she desperately wanted to know what he was saying. To say she was surprised to hear Emmett threaten his friend was an understatement.

Bella leaned forward trying to catch what Edward was saying and was balanced precariously on the edge of the step. She still couldn't hear what Edward was saying and craned her neck further forward, upsetting her center of balance. She toppled down the rest of the stairs with an unflattering squeal of surprise and landed sprawled on her back.

"Bella! Oh my god! Are you okay?"

Bella looked up to see Emmett, Edward and Rosalie peering over her and immediately wanted to bury herself deep in the ground. This was definitely going on the top of her most embarrassing moments list.

"I'm fine. You know me; I trip over nothing. It's not like it's the first time."

Edward chuckled and hooked an arm around Bella's back to bring her up into a sitting position. "Are you sure you didn't hit your head? How's your ankle?"

Any other time, Bella would have been giddy with the attention Edward was showering her with, but right now it was quite humiliating.

"I'm okay. Like I said, this is pretty common."

Despite reassurances, Edward continued to probe Bella's head for tender spots. Tingles rushed through her skin as Edward's gentle fingers traveled through her hair.

"Well, seeing as this is a common occurrence, I'll just have to hang around so I can catch you next time."

Edward gently pulled Bella to her feet as she remained silent, still processing what he had just said. She swayed on her feet a bit and Edward steadied her with a strong hand. She knew it wasn't from her recent tumble down the stairs, though. Edward wanted to be her knight in shining armor; he _wanted_ to catch her. His words implied Bella would be seeing a lot more of the handsome man around.

"Are you sure you didn't hit your head, Bella?"

Edward was looking at Bella with concern, and it wasn't until then that Bella realized her mouth was hanging open slightly and she had been staring.

"F-fine," she giggled nervously. "How about some coffee?"

Edward gave Bella his stunning half-smile and she nearly melted into a puddle right there. She swayed again and Edward's arm around her waist tightened in security. He snickered under his breath; he knew just how his smile was affecting her! He led her to the front door and pulled her jacket off the coat rack, holding it open for her. She blushed at the gesture and Edward laughed again. She really needed to get her body under control or she'd never be able to trust herself around Edward.

"By Em," she called out.

Emmett appeared in the doorway, a slight frown pulling his mouth downward. "Edw-," he began.

"I promise, Emmett. You don't need to worry," Edward was quick to interrupt Emmett.

"Come on, Em. They'll be fine, and Bella is a big girl. Let them go get their coffee." Rosalie tugged on Emmett's arm trying to pull him away and shot Bella an apologetic look. However, Bella didn't think Emmett needed to apologize for anything. She loved how protective he had become of her; it made her feel like someone cared. It made her feel loved.

"Do you have your cell phone, Bells?" Emmett wasn't budging.

Bella pulled it out of her pocket and flashed it to him.

"Do you-,"

"Emmett!" Rosalie cried. "Give it a rest and let them go!"

Emmett grumbled something indecipherable under his breath and crossed his arms, clearly not happy with being scorned by his better half. "I want you to call me if your plans change, Bella. Have fun."

Before Emmett could think of anything else to say to stall them, Bella grabbed Edward's hand and pulled him from the house and into the chilly air.

"I thought we'd never get out of there," Bella laughed, her breath floating out of her mouth in little clouds as she giggled. "Sorry about that."

"Don't apologize. I'm used to putting up with Emmett." Edward held the passenger door of his Volvo open for her. "Besides, it's always nice to see his softer side. He cares about you."

Their eyes locked for a moment, and Bella caught the true insinuation behind his words. A small lump formed in her throat and she swallowed it back. Emmett was just doing what Charlie would have done. Now that he was gone, Emmett felt the need to step into his place and be protector as well as brother.

Edward gently closed Bella's door and ran around to the driver's side, sliding elegantly into his seat. Bella snorted back a laugh. If she tried that, she would most likely end up hurting herself.

The car ride was pleasant, and with Edward driving, they made it to Port Angeles in record time. Before Bella could even unbuckle her seatbelt, Edward was opening her door for her. The butterflies in her stomach reawakened at the act of chivalry and a smile blossomed across her face. A girl could get used to this.

Bella shivered in the cold air as they walked to the little coffee shop down the street. Edward wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into him. Immediately Bella felt warmer, but whether it was from the act or the fact that Edward was touching her, she didn't know.

With his impeccable manners, Edward held the door to the coffee shop open and Bella walked forward, inhaling deeply as the rich aroma of coffee hit her. Right away, she knew this place was going to become one of her favorite retreats. The floor was painted cement, the rich browns, reds and golds bringing warmth despite the cold material. The walls were a natural brick decorated with paintings and carvings from local artists. Small tables with woods bases and copper tops were scattered throughout the room and a cozy looking sofa set was in the corner.

"Edward, this place is wonderful."

Bella jumped as she unexpectedly felt a warm hand take her own.

"I had a feeling you would like this place. I come here a lot; it's a great place to get work done." Edward led Bella to the counter to place their orders, pointing out the various quirks of the place on the way.

"Hey, Edward." The older man at the counter greeted Edward with a large smile.

"Hey, Tom. Good to see you," he greeted back, extending his hand to the older man.

"And who is this beautiful woman you have on your arm?"

Bella blushed for the millionth time that day.

Edward leaned into her and wrapped a loose arm around her waist. "This is Bella Swan. Bella I'd like you to meet Tom. He owns this wonderful place."

Edward turned his attention to Tom. "Bella and I were just talking about how this is one of my favorite places to do work. I have a feeling she won't be that far behind me."

The old man clapped his hands together and grinned broadly at the couple. "It's so nice to hear that. I aim to please my customers. So what can I get you two today?"

Edward glanced down at Bella signaling her to order first. "A cappuccino would be great."

"Make that two cappuccinos, Tom."

The old man, grinning like a fool, danced from one machine to the next behind the counter. "Coming right up. Why don't you go take a seat and I'll bring those on over."

Bella and Edward chose a small table in the corner next to the welcoming fireplace in the back. It was cozy and warm and Bella, still shivering from their short walk outside, was getting a chance to thaw.

"Thanks for bringing me here, Edward. It really is a great place."

"It's my pleasure, Bella. Although, I have to admit that part of my reasoning for bringing you here was selfish. I wanted to see you again; I enjoy spending time with you."

This time it was Edward who blushed, though not the extreme pink that usually graced Bella's cheeks. He looked up, his eyes glistening with excitement and continued.

"First, I'd like to apologize about the other day. I didn't mean to run out on you like that but, as I'm sure you know by now, I was called in by the station I volunteer with."

"I understand. You don't need to apologize. Emmett and I ended up leaving shortly after you did. I should be thanking you really."

Bella paused for a moment and listened to the soothing jazz vocals floating around the little shop. A hand grasping hers on the table brought her back to the paused conversation.

"I appreciate your help in the bathroom. And thank you for not telling anyone. "

Edward frowned and looked Bella in the eye, clutching her hand tighter in his own. "I'm concerned about you, Bella. I understand you're a private person, but what I saw in the bathroom the other night worried me. What made you so upset?"

Bella didn't want to look at Edward. She knew her gaze would immediately be drawn to his eyes where pity would be swirling in their green depths. Instead, she cast her eyes downward.

"Like I said, it was just a bad memory. You don't need to worry about me." Trying to prove her point, Bella gave Edward a weak smile. It was clear to her that Edward wasn't really buying her excuse, but he knew not to push and let the subject drop.

"Just know that if you ever need to talk, I'm more than willing to listen. Okay?"

Bella could hear the sincerity, the tones of worry and something else – something she couldn't identify, in the smooth tenor of his voice. Tears pricked at her eyes and she was extremely grateful when Tom arrived with their cappuccinos.

As they sipped their drinks, the rest of the conversation centered on personal questions. They had almost five years to make up for, five years of growing up and changing to account for.

Bella found out that Edward had intentions of following in his father's footsteps as a doctor and eventually go into emergency medicine. His favorite food was still lasagna and he still played the piano daily. His favorites were clearly flavored by his life experiences and Bella couldn't keep the depression from creeping into her mind.

There wasn't much for her to share with Edward. Her favorites were still the same as when they had last seen each other. She still loved a fully loaded slice of pizza, there was no doubt that she hadn't outgrown her clumsiness and as for the future – well she had no idea what was in store for her. The only flavor the last four years had brought to her favorites was one of despair and misery.

After finishing the last of the cappuccinos, Edward and Bella climbed back into Edward's Volvo and headed to Forks. Their time together had passed too quickly and Bella had no desire for it to end. She settled into the comfortable seat and glanced over at Edward. His eyes, though watching the road, seemed preoccupied and he was chewing his lip. Not wanting to interrupt Edward, she allowed her mind to occupy itself for the rest of the ride.

They pulled into the driveway and Edward turned off the car yet made no move to get out. Instead, he turned to Bella and sighed softly. Feeling awkward in the silence that had fallen over the car, Bella spoke.

"Thanks for bringing me to your little hideout. It was nice spending time with you."

She turned to open her door when a strong hand grasped her arm. She whirled around in surprise at the contact.

"Wait, Bella. I was wondering if, um, if you, if I could take you to dinner this week."

Bella's heart pounded in excitement and surprisingly, panic. How could a god such as Edward Cullen be even remotely interested in her? Was this some sick joke? Even though her mind reeled with the bombardment of questions, she couldn't stop herself from becoming more enraptured with the beauty across from her, or from saying yes.

* * *

_AN: Review please, next chapter is in the works. Suggestions welcome! Review, and next time I run into Robert Pattinson, I'll tell him you say hi! You guys rock. _

_-lmbrtvll_


	9. Chapter 9

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 9

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

_AN: Thank you for your wonderful feedback, I sincerely appreciate every single one. Thank you to PTB for your invaluable input and keen eye on grammar. _

* * *

~_and yet I wait_

Willpower. That, and the fact that his mother Esme had instilled within him the manners of a gentleman, was the only thing that kept Edward from closing the small space between himself and Bella and pressing his lips to hers. He wanted to run a hand through her mahogany locks and pull her closer into him, close enough to feel her heart beating against his own chest.

Just thinking back to the events that had transpired earlier that afternoon stirred something deep within his belly and caused him to become lightheaded with giddiness. Today, Bella had finally opened up a little bit. Her shyness had receded just enough for him to catch a glimpse of the Bella he remembered and missed more than he realized.

Being in his Volvo together was both pleasurable and painful – being around Bella was like being intoxicated. His body felt so alive every second they were together and his blood rushed through his veins with urgency, his eyes alighted with the joy of listening to Bella speak. At the same time, his mind buzzed with desire and his head swam every time he inhaled her enthralling scent. Freesia and strawberries. Sweet and fragile beauty, just like Bella.

He tried to restrain himself today; the ache of needing to touch her driving his body insane. Holding her hand only eased the fire burning within him to a smoldering blaze. He doubted anything short of having his way with the creature he couldn't stop thinking about would ease his suffering; suffering he gladly endured.

Edward groaned and buried his head in his arms, which were crossed on the plain table he sat at. He had been on call at the station for all of one hour yet was barely managing. He was lucky there hadn't been any calls yet, as his mind was focused solely on the girl he had spent the afternoon with.

He, Edward Cullen, also known as "Serially Single Cullen" was enraptured, gripped, and completely in love with Isabella Swan. Not a full week back in her home town, and she had managed to steal his heart with a single smile and a slight brush of her hand along his face.

Yet, something was off and Edward could see it in Bella's warm, brown eyes. There was a new depth there, a sadness that seemed to lead straight into Bella's soul. She looked as though she were harboring something painful and heavy, and he wanted nothing more than to jump in and pull her out. This observation read like a yield sign to him, a warning. Until he figured out whatever was haunting the woman he craved to hold in his arms, he wouldn't push her. He couldn't risk pushing her away. Now that she was home, he couldn't bear her leaving again.

Weary with thought, Edward rubbed his forehead. Here he sat daydreaming about Bella, envisioning every inch of her perfection, and he had no idea how she felt about him. She was a very hard person for him to read. Every little nuance of her expression, her demeanor and her voice, was a sign in a foreign language – there for him but uninterpretable. What he _was_ able to pick up on were the shades of hurt that subtly shone through her well-placed mask.

Edward couldn't imagine anyone wanting to hurt lovely Bella, yet it was clear someone had. Rage clouded his vision for a moment, followed by an overwhelming need to protect the chocolate-haired woman consuming his every thought. The panic he'd seen the night of the party was all too real, too similar to the calls he responded to as a paramedic. Only that night he was experiencing it with an acquaintance. A friend, the object of his affection. And for once, he was terrified; terrified that his hands, experienced and learned, would fail him. He felt helpless and inadequate, to say the very least.

His fingers itched to dial the ten digits that he had already committed to memory. Again, it was sheer willpower that kept him from whipping out his phone and calling her. The exhilaration from earlier had yet to wear off – she had said yes! That one-syllable word had ignited a spark of optimism, hope that his feelings would eventually be reciprocated.

"Eddie, man! You're looking a little preoccupied. I've seen that look before, buddy. Who's the girl?" Ben, one of the other volunteer paramedics, slapped Edward on the shoulder and gave him a friendly shake.

Despite his embarrassment at being caught daydreaming, Edward strove for calm nonchalance. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Ben threw his head back with a bark of laughter and pulled up a seat beside Edward. "Sure, buddy. I know a man in love when I see one, and let me tell you, you've got it bad."

******

"Oh, Bella! This is so exciting! I can't believe you're going out with Edward!" Alice flitted around Bella's small bedroom gracefully, pulling articles of clothing from the closet and chest of drawers.

Bella rolled her eyes at Alice's uncontrollable energy. She remembered from her friendship with Alice as a child that the small girl more than made up for her size with the amount of squealing, jumping around, and flitting she did. She was sure that the pixie had somehow found out that Edward had taken Bella out for coffee. Her bet was on Rosalie. She and Alice seemed to be very close with each other; she wouldn't be surprised if the blonde had called Alice as soon as Bella left with Edward.

More than likely, Alice had weaseled all the details out of Edward as soon as he had returned home which is why she was here, in Bella's room, now. Alice had called two days ago, just one day after the 'coffee trip' as Bella had termed it, and told Bella she would be over Saturday to help her get ready for her date. Bella hadn't even known that Edward would be taking her out Saturday. She figured that was why he had called her less than fifteen minutes later, apologizing for Alice's behavior and properly asking her if Saturday evening was okay with her. Flustered by the whole thing, Bella could only say yes.

And neither person would reveal where Edward was taking her.

"Hold still, Bella. These shirts aren't going to choose themselves and I need to make sure I pick the one that brings out your eyes the most." Alice took her time, clearly unhappy with the small selection and flawed quality of the clothing, holding each shirt up to Bella's face and scrunching her face up. If making strange faces helped Alice pick a shirt quicker, then Bella wouldn't stop her. Alice could let her face get stuck like that for all she cared.

"The blue shirt, then. And I guess these jeans will do." Alice darted back to Bella's closet and started digging on her hands and knees. "Really, Bella? No heels? How is that even possible? You're killing me with this wardrobe. One of these days I'm taking you to the mall and having my way with you."

Had she not been so nervous about her impending date, Bella would have attempted to thwart Alice's plans with an excuse. Not only could she not afford to go shopping, she didn't even want to think about how that would force her to be the center of attention. And if Alice invited Rosalie, which she would most likely do, Bella's already deep-seated and well known feelings of inadequacy would increase tenfold.

Alice huffed and crossed her arms before selecting the fanciest flats Bella had and tossing them in her direction. "Now, get dressed so I can start on your hair and makeup."

Bella grimaced and headed to the bathroom to change in privacy. After changing her outfit, she looked in the mirror and was pleasantly surprised. Granted, this was not an outfit Bella would have chosen for herself but then again, that was why Alice was here. Her skin was creamy and flawless against the royal blue fabric, and since it was her own shirt, it wasn't as revealing as she guessed it could have been had Alice had her way. It flowed away from her body nicely and gave the illusion of womanly curves that Bella hoped she would one day develop now that her life seemed to be heading in a better direction.

"Come on, Bella! Edward is going to show up before we're finished!"

With a resigned sigh Bella sat back down, this time at her desk, and pleaded with Alice to give her five minutes to check her email before she started in on the hair.

With the slow internet connection, it took Bella ages to just log into her account, and by the time her web page loaded it had been almost ten minutes. A quick glance told her she had a new email, but Alice shut the laptop before Bella could click on it.

"I've been very lenient with the time, Bella. I take date preparation very seriously and we're running out of time."

_Wow_, Bella thought, _remind me to never get on Alice's bad side. _

Bella didn't really mind about the email anyway. Seeing as she rarely received any, and she had sent inquiries out to a few colleges not too long ago, it was most likely their response. And she could wait to read those.

Alice had Bella spin her desk chair around and began to work on her hair.

"What are your plans for next week, Bella? Rosalie and I would like to spend some time with you. Maybe go shopping, get a pedicure. I-," Alice paused and concentrated on Bella's hair for a moment.

"I've really missed you Bella. And don't take offense; I'm just saying this because I'm concerned. But you've changed. Is there anything you want to talk about? We used to be best friends; I hope you feel you can trust me."

Bella's breath caught in her throat as Alice's monologue came to a close. Had she really changed that much? Was it that noticeable? She had thought she was doing a good job of hiding it.

"I do trust you, Alice. I'm just getting used to being back in Forks, I think." Bella was lying through her teeth, and as much as she didn't like it, she felt compelled to do so. Alice seemed to be throwing out an open invitation to jump right back into their friendship.

Could she do it? Could she trust Alice - enough to let her back into her life? Did she deserve someone like Alice? It confused her to no end why Alice was even bothering with her; including her. Even Rosalie was putting an effort into inviting Bella to do things, even out to dinner a few times with her and Emmett.

Dizzying whirls of confusion spun in Bella's head, making colors blend and sound spiral to a decibel worthy of a concert arena. She felt like her world was slowly slipping from her control – a strangely exhilarating yet terrifying experience.

"Bella? Hellooo?" Alice waved the curling iron in front of Bella's face and Bella snapped back, the heat from the scorching iron heating her face. The edges of her vision slowly faded into a darkness that she knew, from experience, hid the terrors of her past.

_Renee didn't like to run the air conditioning even though they were living in one of the hottest and driest places in the U.S. She was a penny pincher to the extreme, obsessed with keeping the energy bill as low as possible. _

_Unfortunately for Bella, it was she who ended up doing most of the work around the house, not Renee. So the heat was only oppressive to Bella as Renee got to lounge around the house in front of a fan. _

"_Bella! Don't forget the blouses by the stairs." Renee's voice warbled through the blades of the fan as it floated to Bella's ears in the laundry room. She bit back a groan as she realized her pile of clothing just grew to an extra six pieces, which meant more time being holed up in the tiny, heat-trapping room. _

_In a cooler, less claustrophobic environment, Bella might have enjoyed the calm motions of running the iron back and forth across the different pieces of colored fabric. But there was nothing enjoyable about pushing a hot piece of metal against stiff, sticky shirts and blouses while sweat pricked along her brow and down her back. _

_She quickly grabbed the pile of blouses by the stairs and set to work on the first one. Renee had claimed this was all part of training and educating Bella to become competent in the daily chores a women and wife was expected to do. Bella couldn't help but scoff at the old-fashioned and sexiest ideals her mother was forcing upon her. _

_As she concentrated on smoothing the white of the fabric stretched on the board before her, a wave of heat rolled over her body, and she swayed as dizziness overtook her. She gripped the iron in one hand and the board in the other. Falling in a place as small as the tiny laundry room would only lead to calamity. But the heat continued to roll through her and nausea bubbled up within her stomach as her mouth craved the refreshing smoothness of a cold glass of water. _

"_Bella!" Renee stood in the doorway, her eyes blazing in anger. "Look at what you've done!"_

_With control over her stomach, Bella looked down at the blouse. It was ruined – a perfect charred imprint of the bottom of the iron tarnishing the crisp white of the shirt. _

"_You good-for-nothing waste of space! You can't even do something as simple and menial as ironing! You're absolutely pathetic," she spat, her eyes narrowing in judging anger. "No man will ever want you."_

_Renee turned to leave the muggy confines of the laundry room, only stopping to throw another insult at her daughter. "I want those finished and you're not to leave this room until they are. If you ruin anything else, I'll make sure everyone knows what a failure you've turned out to be. Starting with Charlie. Stupid daddy's girl." _

"Emmett!" Alice's shrill cry of terror pulled Bella from the smoldering hell. "Come on, Bella, look at me."

Bella felt tiny hands grab her face as she slumped against the back of her chair. Her breathing was labored and heavy, and she clutched the arms of the chair tightly in her palms.

"Bella, tell me what's wrong? What happened?" Alice's normally buoyant and perky voice was thin with panic and shook slightly.

Before Bella could respond, Emmett burst into the bedroom and, upon spotting his sister, raced to her side. He took her pallid face in his large hands and stroked her cheek gently with his thumb. Familiar brown eyes met hers, unvoiced questions shining at her.

"Are you okay? I'm worried, Bells. What happened?" Seeing as he wasn't going to be getting an answer out of his still disoriented sister, Emmett turned to Alice.

"What happened?"

Alice raised a trembling hand to her forehead and rubbed. "I don't know. I was curling her hair and she spaced out. Then I waved my hand, well my hand with the iron in front of her face and she freaked. What did I do?"

Bella watched in a haze as Emmett tried to comfort Alice, reassuring her that this was in no way her fault.

Her fault. It was her fault, Bella's fault, that Alice sat on the bed, wiping tears from her eyes, terrified that she had hurt her friend. And that hurt more than anything she had experienced in the past few weeks. Alice was the closest thing she had to a sister and like the fool her mother had said she was destined to be, she was pushing her away.

With a weak arm, Bella reached out to the girl in front of her. "No," she sniffled. "No, Alice. It's not your fault, you've done nothing wrong."

Moving with a grace akin to that of a ballet dancer, Alice was kneeling beside Bella in an instant. "Tell me, please. What happened? Why do you seem so troubled?"

Still tender with the pains of hurting her friend, Bella hesitated. The instinct to protect herself was great and overpowering. Yet the need to not hurt her friend was insistent.

She held back her unshed tears, wary of the carefully-placed makeup on her face. I'll explain later, I promise. I just…I can't right now."

She hung her head in shame; she wasn't strong enough to fess up to Alice right now.

Alice pulled a gentle hand through Bella's hair before resting it on her shoulder. "I understand. Besides -"she smiled "- Edward is going to be here soon. We should try and keep your makeup in place."

Bella appreciated Alice's attempt to lighten the mood and weakly smiled at her. "Thanks."

In just minutes, and without another episode, Alice managed to tame the rest of Bella's hair. The mahogany tresses fell in gentle curls around her shoulders, bringing a fresh sense of vitality to Bella.

At the sound of the doorbell, Alice squealed, causing Bella to quickly cover her ears with her hands. "That's Edward!"

Alice darted from the room while Bella sat frozen in the chair. "Come on, Bella!"

With shaky legs, Bella gripped the railing as she walked down the stairs.

* * *

_I hope you enjoyed, there was a little taste of Edward's POV for those who asked. I hope I delivered. I've been lacking a bit of motivation recently for some unknown reason. A review, no matter how short would be much appreciated, as I take all of your comments and thoughts to heart. Chapter 10 in the works, get ready for the date! Is there anything you guys wanna see in either the next chapter or one of the upcoming ones?_

_-lmbrtvll_


	10. Chapter 10

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 10

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

_**AN: A huge thanks must be given to Fecteau Family (Kristi28 :D) and Lisa for spending the time to clean up my horrible grammar and for the Commas 101 lesson. I'll be working on that. For those who reviewed, know that I appreciate every single one and getting feedback really does make the writing process easier. I can't tell you how many times a review has made that little light bulb go off in my head.**_

_**PLEASE READ AN AT BOTTOM.**_

_**Enjoy chapter 10.**_

* * *

_~the swallow brings_

Unlike last time, Bella made it down the stairs without incident. Her gaze quickly settled on Edward, which wasn't surprising, seeing as he seemed to make the room light up with his presence. Handsome was too dull a word to describe him as he stood in the small foyer, chatting with Emmett.

He too wore jeans and a thinly striped button – down shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. For some odd reason, Bella always found nice arms on a guy very attractive, and having his sleeves rolled up only highlighted the fact that Edward's arms were constructed of perfectly sculpted muscle.

As soon as he noticed her presence, Edward shifted his body toward Bella, his eyes widening. "Bella," he paused and gulped audibly. "You look beautiful."

Like clockwork, Bella blushed and concentrated her gaze down at her feet. "Thanks. You look great too." Neither of them said anything else, and Edward's eyes seemed fixed on Bella.

"Well, you two crazy kids get out of here!" Alice grabbed both Bella and Edward and pushed them towards the front door, ushering them out into the cold night air.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to stare like that. It's just, Emmett makes me so nervous…not that you don't look great, because you do, I just didn't want you to think I was staring at your breasts, um I mean cleavage, ch-."

Edward's face was flushed, and his hands were trembling. It was obvious he was nervous, and it put Bella at ease.

She gently grabbed his arm as she cut him off. "Edward, you're rambling."

This time it was Edward's turn to blush, and he released a deep breath. He turned his megawatt smile on and glanced at Bella. "I think it's safe to say it stopped."

Still feeling brazen, Bella chuckled. "I'm glad. I don't know if I would have been able to put up with your runaway mouth for the entire date."

Edward feigned hurt and laughed as he opened the car door for Bella before sliding into the driver's seat himself. They didn't talk much during the car ride, and the nerves that had previously been occupying Edward's stomach seemed to have taken up residence in Bella's. Eventually, the car rolled to a stop in front of a restaurant she had never seen or heard of before.

The large, wooden front doors were held open for them as they entered, and the décor was exquisite. Anything made of wood, which was most of the restaurant, was dark and rich, and the fabrics were heavy.

"Good evening, sir." The hostess greeted Edward with a friendly smile buried under layers of make up, completely oblivious to Bella. Obviously, the woman had fallen prey to Edward's dazzling charm. A wave of jealousy washed over her, catching her off guard. This was their first and most likely last date; she had absolutely no claim over Edward, nor should she feel jealous.

"Hello," Edward responded, unfazed. "Our reservations are under Cullen."

The hostess stared for a moment before she realized she needed to enter the reservation and seat the party. "Of course, right this way."

The sight of the hostess wedged into her too – tight black dress nauseated Bella, and while she would _never_ want to look like the plastic Barbie leading them, she was brutally reminded of her own inadequacies. She didn't have the curves that shaped the bodies of women men like Edward probably admired. While she wasn't completely shapeless, she would never be able to properly fill out a dress like that.

The sound of a throat clearing immediately stopped her internal dialogue. Edward had pulled her chair out for her and was staring at her with a raised eyebrow.

"Are you okay?"

Bella blushed at being caught. "Fine. Just admiring the restaurant."

She and Edward had been seated at a small private table constructed of dark, polished wood. They were in the corner of the cozy room, and as she looked around, she noticed the décor. It was a library!

Instead of your typical wallpaper or paint, the walls were covered with solid and intricately crafted shelves overflowing with books, many of them antique. The room was dimly lit and intimate, making her feel as though they truly were sitting in a traditional library.

"Oh, Edward," she breathed, stunned not only by the magnificence of their surroundings but also by the fact that Edward would remember such a petty little fact about her, enough to take her to a restaurant such as this.

"It's absolutely beautiful." She took her seat, still admiring the walls surrounding them.

"Not as beautiful as you, but a close second."

For the second time in mere minutes, Bella's face was aflame and nerves danced in her stomach.

"Thank you. And thank you for bringing me here."

"I remembered how much you enjoyed books when we were younger. Hell, I had to pull them out of your hands half the time just to get you to spend time with us." Edward chuckled before continuing. "I thought this place was perfect for you."

"It is."

"I wanted tonight to be special."

Bella's stomach dropped. "Special" wasn't a word she heard often and when she did, Renee was usually referencing Bella's intelligence. To hear Edward say that brought out an unusual mix of emotions. She was thrilled that he had wanted to do something for her, and it was obvious he had put a lot of thought into their plans. But there was also a sharp pang of something painful, something Bella couldn't quite identify. Deep down, she knew she wasn't good enough for Edward. Soon he would tire of seeing her, and all this would come to an end.

She smiled at Edward, determined not to let any of her negative thoughts ruin her night.

All throughout dinner, Bella couldn't help but admire Edward as he spoke. It looked like there had been an attempt to tame the unruly copper mess that topped his head, and while it looked marginally better it was still bed head.

_Sexy bed head._

What Bella found most endearing was were? Edward's eyes, and not just the color. While the green depths sparkled like emeralds in the candlelight, what caught her attention was the way the corner of his eyes would crinkle when he became completely engrossed in the conversation. She couldn't

stop watching, and her fingers itched to reach out and smooth his face.

Becoming more and more at ease as the night wore on, Bella could allow herself to sink into a comfortable conversation with Edward. Dinner was delicious, and with a little prodding, Edward convinced her to share a slice of the chocolate lava cake.

After finishing dessert and paying the check, Edward slid his fingers through Bella's, and instead of leading her toward the car, led her away from it.

"Edward, where are we going?" Bella had become flustered. Not only did the unexpected contact leave her reeling and breathless with an electric current running through her body, she couldn't believe Edward wanted to spend _more_ time with her after what was a lengthy dinner.

With gleaming eyes and a crooked, playful grin, Edward raised his finger to his lips - the universal sign for secrecy. They followed the sidewalk for a few blocks before Edward veered sharply to the left, climbing over a grassy hill and pulling Bella with him.

Notoriously cloudy, the night was unusually clear, and both Edward and Bella stopped at the top of the slope to admire the view. The steep downgrade flowed in lush, green waves of grass to a small, rocky embankment that led to a large body of water. The full moon was bright in the sky and reflected perfectly in the water.

Bella couldn't help the grin that slid onto her face. "You're full of surprises, Edward."

He chuckled in response and guided her down the hill. They found a small stone wall near the water's edge and sat, with their hands still intertwined.

Finally, Edward spoke. "This is one of my favorite spots, second only to the woods near my house. I like to come here to think; it's usually quiet.

Bella squeezed his hand in understanding, excited that Edward might be sharing a secret part of him with her. "Do you come often?"

He nodded his affirmation. "I usually have a lot on my mind, and lately-" he rubbed the back of his neck shyly "-there's been even more."

Bella remained silent. He was so close to opening up to her; it felt wonderful to be needed.

"Do you want to know what I've been thinking about lately?"

Biting her lip, Bella was the one to shake her head this time.

Edward drew a shaky breath, and for a moment, Bella was worried. Edward was a strong and able man. In her eyes, nothing frightened him. To see him so uneasy, so nervous, made her uncomfortable. Worst-case scenarios ran through her head. Maybe he was telling her he didn't want to spend time with her anymore, or maybe he was ill, terminally ill. That thought left Bella's stomach rolling, and she silenced her inner dialogue, arguing that it would be best to let Edward say what he needed to instead of jumping to conclusions.

"You," he whispered so quietly, Bella thought she had misheard him.

"I'm sorry, Edward. I didn't hear you."

"You," he repeated. "You are what has been on my mind for the past few weeks. Ever since you came back, really. I've never been drawn to anyone the way I feel drawn to you."

Her hands and arms tingled with disbelief, and her breathing quickened as her heart pounded. She gripped the edge of the stone wall beneath her, and the sharp pain in her hands let her know she wasn't dreaming. With an open mouth, she glanced up at Edward, who was looking at her anxiously with a pale face.

Her mind was spinning in a million different directions as she tried to understand what was happening. Edward had just admitted he had _feelings_, real feelings for _her_, and while her heart wanted desperately to be with him, this was too crazy, too impossible to be true. How could anyone believe that a stunning man like Edward Cullen would have romantic feelings for a plain, worthless girl like her? It just didn't make sense – at least not to Bella.

She thought back through the events of the past few weeks. Edward had been friendly, caring, there for her. Could she risk it? Could she risk getting hurt and having her heart broken by someone she thought to be one of her closest friends?

She desperately wanted to be with him, and after a few moments of internal debate, she decided she would do it. She would close her eyes, open her heart and take a leap of faith. Not only that, she would make sure she was perfect for Edward. Renee may have realized Bella's inadequacies, but it seemed Edward had not. Not yet at least, and Bella was determined to keep it that way.

"Bella?"

Still in thought, she could only manage a simple response. "Hmm?"

"Are you okay? You haven't said anything. I didn't mean to offend-."

"I like you, too." Bella blushed at her boldness, but it did the job and silenced Edward.

"I'd like to take you out again." Once again, Edward pulled Bella's hand into his.

"I'd like that," she responded shyly, all boldness forgotten.

"You know you can talk to me, right, Bella?" Edward's voice had dropped to a hushed, soothing tone, and he was caressing her hand.

She gulped nervously and stiffened slightly. Did Edward know something? Why else would he ask a question like that? What she really wanted to do was take a step back from the situation – slow things down. But she had already given Edward the okay to take her out again, and running away was no longer an option. So, she simply nodded her head, then allowed it to rest attentively on Edward's shoulder.

They sat silently for a while, though Bella nearly squealed with delight when Edward wrapped his arm around her waist. She felt safe with him, as safe as she felt with Emmett, which was saying a lot, considering her behemoth of a brother had practically become her bodyguard overnight.

"Bella?" She could feel the vibrations of Edward's voice through his shoulder, and she shivered at the masculinity of it.

"Yes, Edward?" Her mouth had become dry, and she unconsciously licked her lips.

"May I kiss you?"

Bella blinked and cracked a smile. He wanted to kiss her! Tonight was quite possibly one of the best nights of her entire life.

"Yes," she whispered.

Edward moved his mouth closer to hers and with each inch of space that disappeared, Bella's heart beat that much faster.

Warmth was the first thing that registered in Bella's shocked mind. Edward's lips were so warm and soft – inviting. He pressed them gently to hers and moved his hand to her neck, pulling her slightly forward. Her skin tingled in pleasure as he brushed his tongue against her lips, asking for entrance. Timidly, she allowed him in and was immediately gratified.

The passion she had felt moments earlier had increased tenfold, and she grasped the collar of his shirt tightly. Contrary to what she had previously believed, kissing someone like this – no – kissing Edward like this was nice. Very nice.

They pulled apart, both breathless with rosy cheeks and swollen lips.

"Wow." Bella sighed in contentment. She closed her eyes and rested her forehead on Edward's shoulder. He brushed her hair back soothingly and chuckled.

"I've been wanting to do that since you first came back."

"You mean when you saw me at my finest, splayed out and bleeding on the bathroom floor?" She didn't understand how anyone could find that attractive.

Laughing heartily, Edward continued to stroke her hair. "That would be when."

"Oh God," she groaned. "Can we please forget that ever happened?"

Edward pulled away from her, the smile gone from his face, but happiness and something else, something much more meaningful, were apparent in his eyes.

"I don't think I can do that, Bella. You see, then I would be forgetting the moment my heart became yours."

Tears welled in Bella's eyes, and she had to force herself to take a calming breath. She didn't know how to respond; how did one even respond to an admission like that?

"Oh, Edward…" She did the only thing she could think to do and brought her lips back to Edward's.

Easily, they fell back into a dance of touches, caresses and passion – driven kisses. When they pulled apart, Edward fiercely hugged Bella to his chest and pressed his lips down upon the top of her head.

Bella didn't know how much time had passed, but eventually she grew cold. She tried to suppress the tremors that were beginning to shake her body; she didn't want to ruin the moment, and she didn't want Edward to find out. She could tough it out.

Unfortunately, she wasn't able to hide her chill for long, and as soon as she shivered, Edward noticed.

"You're cold." It was more of a statement than a question.

"I'm fine. I like being here with you." In her effort to sound nonchalant and unbothered by the cold, Bella's words were rushed and unnecessary – Edward was stubborn.

"Don't be silly, Bella. We can always come back. I could never forgive myself if you became sick from the cold." He stood and took her hand, pulling her up. "Come on, let's get you home."

Bella reluctantly followed Edward back to the car. This had been one of the best yet most frightening nights of her life.

All too soon, Edward pulled up to Bella's house and helped her from the car. He walked her to her front door and took hold of her hands, moving in to kiss her goodnight when movement in the window caught their attention. Staring directly at them was Emmett, and he wasn't moving. Bella blushed furiously and began to mutter under her breath, beyond embarrassed at what her brother-turned-bodyguard was doing.

With resignation, Edward placed a sweet and innocent kiss on Bella's cheek and left with a final goodbye of "Sweet dreams."

Bella locked the door behind her and made sure Edward had left before releasing a large sigh and kicking off her shoes. She was both physically and mentally exhausted and wanted nothing more to crawl into bed giving her mind a chance to rest.

"So?" Emmett, who obnoxiously drew the word out for emphasis, stood leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed and his mouth curled into a smirk.

"So what, Emmett?" Bella really wasn't in the mood to play games with her brother.

"So, you. Edward. Date. How did it go?"

Bella was actually somewhat surprised to see how interested Emmett was in the date and how passive he seemed to be acting. "Um, it was good. I had a nice time. Goodnight."

"Hold it!" Bella froze mid-turn.

"I saw you and Edward getting cozy on the front porch. It looked better than 'good'." Emmett was really digging for details, but Bella wasn't budging. Though, it was kind of sweet.

"Goodnight, Emmett." This time, Bella didn't stop at the sounds of Emmett's protests as she headed upstairs. She quickly changed into her pajamas and washed up for bed.

Bella padded over to her desk and started up her laptop. The bright screen blinded her for a moment, but her eyes adjusted and she made quick work of logging in to her email account. She was excited when she saw that she had a new message and eagerly clicked on the icon, assuming it was from one of the colleges she was waiting to hear from. To her surprise, the message was from an unknown sender.

_You worthless bitch,_

_How dare you desert me after all I've done for you. You've made quite the mess of things, and I've had to cover your sorry ass. Mark my words, I will find you, I will drag you back to Phoenix, and I will make you pay._

_How you've managed to survive without my help is beyond me. You've probably conned someone into feeling sorry for you like the whore you are. Don't get too comfortable, you little shit. Soon they'll realize just how worthless you are, and you'll be kicked out on your sorry ass quicker than you can think. _

_You don't deserve to be happy. Your stupidity has really shone through, and it sickens me to call you my daughter – you're a disgrace. _

_I'll be seeing you soon, and don't expect a warm greeting._

_Renee_

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**If anyone is looking for something new to read, check out my new one-shot Essence. It was my first time writing anything remotely smutty and I would LOVE any feedback to help with future endeavors. Please check it out!**

**-lmbrtvll**


	11. Chapter 11

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 11

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

**_ S.M. owns Twilight_**

**_AN: _**Thanks to Lisa and Blake for being amazing betas and fighting the never ending comma war. And thank you to those who have not only read but left me a review. Reading them are exactly the motivation I need to keep going and make me want to be a better writer. So, thanks!!

**Don't forget to check out my newest story, Essence. It's a little...different. **

* * *

~_ a song to hard to follow, that no one else can sing_

The world came crashing down upon Bella that night. Her happy demeanor quickly faded as she identified the sender; the name practically jumped off the screen at her. Not like she really needed a name to tell her who had sent her the email – she had immediately recognized the criticizing, biting tone.

With a shaky hand, she quickly shut the window and closed her laptop. She would tell no one about this. No one else needed to be exposed to Renee's harsh criticism of Bella. God, if anyone besides Emmett ever found out, she would never be able to face them again.

Silent tears ran down her cheeks as she crawled into bed, fearing her brief period of happiness was coming to an end. Clutching her pillow, her thoughts spun wildly for a few brief minutes before exhaustion overtook her.

**********

Bella awoke the next morning to bright sunlight abusing her closed eyes. The memories from last night flooded back into her consciousness, and for a moment, she allowed herself to feel every bit the carefree girl she was when she thought of Edward. At least until Renee reader her ugly head in Bella's mind.

A pit of anxiety welled up in her stomach as she recalled the vicious email from last night. Her mother hadn't held back, and Bella had no doubt she would be true to her word and come find her.

Now was most definitely not the time to be worrying about her past coming back to haunt her. Today was the Fourth of July, and the Cullens were planning a holiday barbeque. Bella shivered in disgust as she recalled the last barbeque she had attended. Thankfully, she was pretty sure there wouldn't be cake tonight, and she resolved not to let anything affect her.

She slid off her bed and trotted into the bathroom, making sure to lock the door behind her. In just one short hour, she and Emmett would be leaving to spend the day at the Cullens', and Bella needed to make herself presentable, even if it was more for Edward than herself.

She turned towards the mirror and sighed, unhappy with the girl staring back at her. While her chocolate eyes were large and sweet, they harshly contrasted with the paleness of her skin. She had managed to put on a little bit of needed weight since living here, filling out her cheeks and concave chest but failing to bring a permanent, healthy glow to her face.

With a sigh of exasperation, Bella quickly showered and threw on a pair of dark jeans and a blue and white top Alice had managed to sneak into her closet.

Bella checked her appearance again and, to her surprise, wished Rosalie or Alice was around to help her with her makeup. Bella didn't have any nor did she know how to apply it.

_Not like it would do you any good. You can't help a lost cause._ Renee's voice was back with a vengeance.

Emmett and Bella pulled up to the beautiful Cullen mansion later that morning and were welcomed with hugs and cheerful greetings. Esme, always put together, was wearing a red, white and blue summer dress, which coordinated with Carlisle's blue polo and white slacks.

While Carlisle was by any standard looking every part the Ralph Lauren model he couldn't hold a candle to Edward. He greeted Bella with a smooth hello, and wrapped his arm around her waist before kissing her on the cheek. Too bad Emmett was still watching; she might have gotten a kiss on the lips, had he not been there.

There was always later.

"What has you grinning, love?" Edward's green eyes looked mischievous, as though he knew what she had been thinking.

"Nothing. I'm just really happy to see you."

Really, really happy to see you, she thought blissfully.

She tightened her arms around Edward and rested her head against his chest. The soothing rhythm of his heartbeat pulsed in her ear, and the heat from his chest warmed her face. She could let Edward hold her like this forever. She felt safe and protected and the little girl that Renee had called weak and ugly was hidden away.

Bella had always felt safe with Edward. When was was younger, she's spent most of her time with Alice, following Emmett and Edward around; the boys had always made sure their younger sisters were looked out one skin her knee, a band-aid would appear out of thin air and be tenderly placed on the afflicted skin. Should a boy hurt their feelings, Edward and Emmett would have a talk with him, and said boy wouldn't be able to look at either girl for at least a week.

As much as Emmett and Edward had claimed annoyance at Alice and Bella tagging along, it was clear that neither boy really meant it.

_The four of them were at the Cullens' house and were taking advantage of the rare sunshine by entertaining themselves in the spacious backyard. Bella and Alice were sitting on the low wall of the patio while Edward and Emmett ran around in the grass with a football. They had been yelling at the girls for the past twenty minutes, trying to goad them into playing a game of two-on-two. _

_"Bellaaa! Come play! I promise to go easy on you." Emmett's whiny voice was becoming quite irritating to the two girls on the wall. Bella rolled her eyes and gave Alice a look of resignation. She knew this wouldn't end until they gave in and joined the boys._

_She stood up and brushed off her pants, making sure to scowl at her brother and Edward. Alice followed suit with quite a bit more bounce in her step. Maybe it was a good idea to let Alice burn off some of her energy. _

"_One game, that's it. And if either of you hurt Alice or me, I'm telling Dad and Carlisle." _

"_Deal. How about we make it a little easier? You and Edward against Alice and me?" _

_Bella remained silent for a moment in an attempt to not seem overly eager. If Edward ever find out she had a crush on him, she would die. Besides, he was way too old for her. She was just thirteen to his seventeen, and Bella doubted that any romantic feelings for her had ever even crossed his mind. _

"_Yeah, I guess that's okay. I mean, Alice is the smallest; it makes sense she should play with you." Bella turned towards Edward and nearly melted when he pulled her into a two-person huddle. She could feel his warm breath tickling her neck, and her brain immediately turned to mush. _

_Her heart lurched as she realized that this could be the last time Edward Cullen ever touched her. She would be leaving to move in with her mother in Arizona in just a few days, and she had yet to tell Edward. Only Alice and Emmett knew, and she had to admit that she was a little anxious to tell him. She didn't want to because it would not only verify the realness of the situation, but it would also break her heart. _

"_Okay. Your goal is to keep the ball away from Emmett if you get it and to block Alice from getting it. If you get the ball to me, I can make a touchdown."_

_Bella nodded mutely and went to take her position on the field. They began the game, which, for Bella, consisted mainly of running around like an idiot. That was, until the ball somehow landed in her arms. She looked down at her arms, an expression of amazement gracing her face, and stared stupidly until Edward called out to her. _

"_Bella! Run!"_

_She moved faster than she'd ever thought she could, and before she knew it, she was flying across the designated goal line. Strong arms pulled her off the ground and swung her around, causing her to squeal. _

"_You did it! We beat Emmett and Alice! I'll make sure he doesn't forget about this for a while." Edward was breathing hard with excitement and his face was flushed. Even sweaty, he was still gorgeous. _

_Bella looked up at him, still wrapped in his arms, and their eyes locked. Brown met green and for a second, the world around them stopped. Currents shot through her body and she inhaled sharply at the sensation before regaining her composure. She played what had just happened off as nothing for the sake of everyone else. _

_Both Bella and Edward were giggling in excitement, and glancing at Alice's and Emmett's faces was enough to send them into another round of laughter. If anything, this was a great way to spend one of her last days in Forks, no matter how sad she was to be leaving._

"_Kids, the cookies are ready." Esme was always baking something and always made sure she had something prepared for when Bella and Emmett were around. Bella knew it was partly due to the fact that Emmett was constantly eating and partly due to the face that Esme loved her and Emmett as she did her own children. She watched with a pang of sadness as Esme placed a large plate of what looked to be chocolate chip cookies on the patio table._

"_Edward, Emmett, make sure you boys share with Alice and Bella." Esme's warning was anything but harsh and she left with a sweet smile. _

_Naturally, Edward and Emmett were the first to reach the cookies, and each had grasped a handful before Alice and Bella could grab one._

"_You think you would know the meaning of sharing by know, Hogward. I guess that's why Mom and Dad call you're their special little boy; you haven't yet_ _m__astered the basic etiquette of a five-year-old." _

_Bella nearly choked on her cookie at Alice's jest. She was half expecting Edward to retort with something equally as mean back, especially since Emmett was laughing hysterically next to him, cookie crumbs spraying from his mouth. _

_Instead, Edward turned to Bella with the plate of cookies in his hand. "Would you care for a cookie, Bella?" he asked with an unusually polite air, just like a proper gentleman. _

_Bella took a second cookie, drinking in the attention she was getting from her crush. Edward placed the plate back on the table, turned to Alice and stuck out his tongue. _

_Alice just shook her head. "Like I said, a five-year-old." _

_The entire group joined in on the laughter, and pretty soon, thanks to Edward and Emmett, the cookies were gone. Emmett returned to the backyard to toss around the football, and Alice needed a bathroom break. Bella stood, grabbed the empty plate and walked toward the house to return the plate to Esme. With her luck and lack of grace, her Converse encased foot caught one of the bricks and she felt herself careening downward. _

_Bella squeezed her eyes shut and braced her body for inevitable impact. She was already running through the millions of ways she could apologize to Esme for shattering her plate. What a great way to say goodbye to the Cullens. _

_But Bella never came into contact with the hard, unforgiving brick patio. Instead, she found herself suspended in the air for a moment before she was placed upright onto her own to feet. She cracked open one eye to make sure she wasn't imagining things and bit back a gasp when she saw it was Edward who had saved her – and the plate – from meeting an untimely demise. _

"_Thanks, Edward," she whispered. _

"_I'll always be there to catch you, Bella. I promise. Someone needs to make sure you don't hurt yourself." Edward gave her a warm smile and picked a blade of grass off her shoulder. _

_Bella's heart felt like it was splintering. That was the sweetest thing a boy had ever said to her, and she was leaving in two days. Now she had to deal with the consequences and finally tell Edward. _

"_Can we talk?" _

"_Sure." Edward grabbed her hand and led her over to the patio wall. He took the plate and put it back on the table before joining her up on the wall, both sitting so they looked out over Esme's magnificent garden. "What's up?"_

"_Edward, I'm moving." Once again, Bella's mouth had run away with her words, and she found herself angry and frustrated. That was not how she had wanted to tell Edward; being blunt was not her style. _

_Edward continued to stare out into the garden, the hot sun creating highlights of warm red in his perpetually messy hair. His mouth turned downward into a frown, and his brow creased. _

_Edward had yet to say anything, so she continued. "Renee is forcing me to move to Arizona and live with her; there's nothing I can do to stop it. I don't want to go." _

_Bella whispered the last part, her throat suddenly dry with emotion. _

"_Why did you wait so long to tell me?" The hurt in Edward's voice was evident, and Bella like she was suffocating from the guilt weighing upon her chest. _

"_I'm sorry, I was scared. I didn't know how to tell you. I'm going to miss…Forks." Bella flushed at her near slip-up. _

"_I promised I would always be there to catch you. Who's going to make sure you don't fall?" Edward's voice quivered, and he positioned his head away from Bella._

"_I'm sorry." Bella jumped down from the ledge and walked quickly toward the front of the house, intent on walking home. She hadn't meant to upset Edward, and she felt terrible. _

"_Bella, wait!" Edward was chasing after her, his floppy copper hair bouncing as he ran. He reached her and pulled her into a tight embrace._

"_I'll miss you, too." _

A kiss pressed down on the top of her head pulled Bella back from her memories. "Shall we go join the others out back, love?"

She was still wrapped snugly in Edward's arms and had no desire to move. "Edward, do you still play the piano?"

He hummed his affirmation. "Why do you ask?"

"Well, I was wondering if you would play for me," she asked sweetly.

"Of course, anything for you. Come with me." Edward took Bella's handed and guided her through the familiar and welcoming house. They reached the room that housed the piano, and Edward sat Bella down in one of the white, modern looking armchairs while he moved to the piano bench.

Instinctually, Bella curled her legs underneath her and rested her elbows on the soft arm of the chair. Edward began to warm up at the keys with a few scales before turning to Bella.

"Any requests?" He grinned at her, and she nearly melted. He looked so handsome in his green t-shirt and jeans, and his smile brightened his already breathtaking face.

"Surprise me," she giggled.

Edward placed his pianist's hands on the ivory keys and breathed deeply before beginning. Bella admired the way his large hands stretched and glided from key to key, the way his foot caressed the pedal and sustained the ringing music.

The first few notes were tentative, slow and sweet. It was almost as though Edward were playing each phrase how he might speak it. The ritardandos and accelerandos made the music sweep in waves and the crescendos and decrescendos made Bella feel like the notes were dancing in the air in front of her. The melody was soothing yet playful. There were more somber moments, and during these, Edward would almost stop playing as he leaned in closer, his hands skimming over the keys.

It was art. It was beautiful, and Bella almost felt like she was getting a peek into Edward's soul. She could forget herself here in this in-between world of music and Edward. Renee couldn't touch her; she was safe and loved and completely at ease.

Slowly, the music came to an end. The strong major chords thinned out and diminished into a soft triad of resolution, his fingers not yet leaving the keys. They sat still for a few minutes as the last few notes lingered in the air.

Bella didn't even realize Edward was kneeling in front of her until she felt his thumb gently brush her cheek. She looked down to see that his finger was wet, and his face was marked with a look of concern and self-hatred. "I'm sorry, I've made you cry."

Bella hadn't even realized she had been crying until Edward had wiped her face. "No! Don't apologize." She sniffed and continued to wipe her face. "That was absolutely beautiful. I've never experienced anything like it. Thank you."

"Why are you thanking me? I made you cry." Edward's brow creased in confusion.

Bella reached out, softly smoothed away his furrows, and caressed his cheek. She was being bold, and it scared her, but he had just shared a hidden part of himself with her. She could venture out of her comfort zone and comfort him, make him see that she was fine. Better than fine, really.

"I'm glad you made me cry. It lets me know I'm still me," she assured him. "Edward, what you just did was pure magic. You shared a part of yourself that was absolutely breathtaking, inside and out. That's why I'm thanking you. Promise me you'll play for me again?"

"I promise." Edward rested his lips on hers, the perfect ending for Bella.

"Come on. I'm sure everyone is looking for us." Bella followed Edward's lead after making sure she wasn't puffy-eyed and red-faced from crying, and they joined the rest of the family on the patio.

"Where were you two love birds?" Alice kept an interrogating eye on Bella and Edward as they found two empty chairs. As expected, Bella blushed bright red at being called out, and she buried her face in Edward's shoulder before taking a seat next to Emmett.

"Hey, Bella. How are you?" Rosalie was seated on Emmett's other side and gave Bella a little wave as she greeted her.

"I'm good. I have a favor to ask of you, though. Can we talk later?"

The blonde nodded with enthusiasm, and then turned her attention back to Emmett who sat patiently and watched with adoration as his girlfriend and sister conversed.

"So, Bella. How have you adjusted to living back in Forks?" Alice was stroking Jasper's unruly blonde hair as he spoke. Bella didn't know what it was about him, but for some reason she trusted him. He projected an air of calmness around him, and she couldn't help but be influenced by him when she was in his presence.

Bella ran her hand through her hair nervously and thought a moment before answering. "It's been great. I've missed Emmett. And believe it or not, I've missed the weather. Especially after seeing the Cullens, I feel like I'm home again."

"You are home, Bella," Alice chirped.

She _was_ home. She just hoped she could stay.

"What I really can't wait for is our shopping trip together!" Alice squealed. She could barely contain her excitement, and Jasper could barely contain _her._

"Um, what?" Bella didn't remember planning any shopping trip with Alice, though she'd come to realize after a few weeks of living here that most of her clothing left her way underdressed for Washington weather.

"I need to take you shopping. I know it's not your thing, but give me a few hours and free reign, and I'll work wonders on your wardrobe." Alice's eyes were gleaming as she envisioned their shopping excursion.

Bella could feel the heat creep up her neck and face, and she looked down. Was it really that obvious? She didn't think she looked _that_ bad. But a trip with Alice couldn't hurt; she did need clothing. And some makeup tips. She would definitely invite Rosalie as well. She had promised herself that would make an effort to get to know Rosalie better, and this seemed like the perfect opportunity.

"I guess it couldn't hurt-"

"Oh my God! I can't believe you actually agreed! And without a fight! This is great!" Alice was wide-eyed and flushed, nearly shaking with anticipation.

"Could Rosalie come too?" Bella looked from the tiny, raven-haired girl to the statuesque blonde, looking for an answer.

"Of course! This is going to be so much fun. Rose is probably one of the most fun people to shop with. She has a great eye. She-" Jasper clapped a hand around Alice's mouth, effectively silencing her and earning a mocking round of applause from the table.

"Oh, Bella, dear. Could you come help me with the salad?" Esme stood from the table and motioned for Bella to follow her. Esme was like Bella's mother when she had been younger; she couldn't help but comply.

They entered the empty kitchen, and Esme pulled vegetables from the fridge. Aware of Bella's clumsiness, she took the job of slicing the tomatoes and cucumbers, and instructed Bella to rip the lettuce.

"I haven't yet had a chance to really talk to you since you've moved back. How are you, dear?"

Bella was surprised by the question. She knew Esme took her role of being a mother very seriously, but she didn't really consider herself to be under Mother Esme's wing, at least, not anymore.

"I'm – uh…I've been doing fine, I guess."

"I just can't help but to notice, sweetheart. You've changed, and I worry about you. You're so quiet now. It's just…" Esme never finished her sentence and instead turned back to the vegetables and resumed chopping in silence.

It was clear to Bella that she was upsetting Esme to an extent, and that bothered her. But she couldn't divulge the information she wished to keep secret from everyone but Emmett.

Telling Esme would virtually be telling everyone else. Maybe eventually she would let the Cullens in on her secret, but now was definitely not the time – not when she had Renee's email to worry about, not when she was just getting her life to a better place.

"I'm – I'm doing okay. Really. Emmett's been great, and so has Edward." Bella left it at that. She feared that if she continued, she would end up saying too much.

"You're like a daughter to Carlisle and me, and should you need us, we're here for you. Anything you need at all." She stopped and took a moment to stroke Bella's hair with a look of longing in her eyes. "Come on, dear. Let's get this outside. I'm sure everyone's starving."

Bella breathed a sigh of relief, thankful that Esme knew when not to push. She was grateful for the show of support. It was nice knowing she had a mother figure to turn to here, that her childhood mother still saw her as a daughter.

She squinted as the bright sun struck her eyes and blinded her to those around her. She stumbled a bit, unsure of her footing and was certain she would fall until she felt familiar arms steady her – Edward.

"You alright there, love? I'm sorry about my mother, by the way. She can be a bit overwhelming. That's where Alice gets it from, annoying pixie. I'm sorry about that, too. I didn't know she was intent on having you as her shopping hostage, though I should have figured."

"No apologies necessary, Edward. Your mom was really nice; I missed her. And believe it or not, I was kind of thinking of asking Alice for some help with my clothing, anyway." Bella laughed when Edward's jaw dropped in mock astonishment.

"I know, I know. Who would've thought?"

Edward chuckled, wrapped an arm around Bella, and pressed his lips to hers, earning a round of cheers from Alice and Rosalie. Embarrassment caught up with Bella, and she fumbled with the bowl. Luckily, Edward was quick and managed to save the salad, the only casualties being a few leaves and a slice of cucumber.

"Maybe I should take this from you." Edward placed the bowl in the middle of the table and pulled Bella onto his lap as he sat down.

"Edward! You can't eat with me here!" She tried to get up, but Edward immediately pulled her back down onto his lap and shifted her so she was sitting sideways.

"Don't be silly, Bella, of course I can. I just need you to make us both a plate."

Bella giggled at the silliness of the situation and at Edward's stubbornness, but eagerly topped both of their hot dogs with mustard and ketchup. Of course, Edward had to be different, and disgusting in her opinion, and asked her to slather on a thick layer of relish as well.

"You'd better not drip that disgusting green stuff on me, Edward. I was nice enough to touch it to put it on your hot dog, but that's as close as I ever want to come to it again."

Edward took the hot dog from Bella and gave her a quick peck on the cheek. "Thanks, Love." He took a big bite, his eyes rolling backwards in enjoyment. "Sooo good," he moaned, his mouth full.

Love. Bella's heart fluttered. She had never thought such a simple, unadorned term of endearment would cause her to swoon like a fool in love. She couldn't deny that there was something there, in her heart, for Edward. Was it love? She wasn't sure; she'd never experienced anything outside of familial love before. Though every time she looked into his emerald eyes, every time he pulled her close, her heart beat a little faster, just for him. It terrified her to no end, to be so out of control with her feelings, but the safety she felt around Edward compelled her to not pull away.

He was worth it.

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So...what are you guys thinking? Reviews would be incredible!

_-lmbrtvll_


	12. Chapter 12

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 12

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

**AN: I'm sooooo sorry for the delay. For weeks I had the attention span of a squirrel. I would seriously write a sentence and then move on to something else. It was terrible! Hopefully this chapter will make up for it.**

**Thank you for your reviews, they really keep me going. I can't tell you enough, how much they mean to me, I read and love every single one. So please keep it up.**

**Special shout out to Bianca Hale, your review was one of the most flattering I've ever recieved. **

**THANK YOU to my wonderful, amazing, understanding, talented betas, Lisa - you're awesome.**

**On with the story...**

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_~that no one else can sing_

"Kiss me." Bella was inches away from Edward's face and was staring at his lips. Pink and smooth, they pulled into a frown, and Bella forced herself to pull away and focus her attention on Edward's overall expression. You couldn't decipher someone's mood just by looking at their lips. A smile, for instance, could indicate happiness, tension or even sadness. It was all in the eyes. One glance at the eyes, the telltale windows to the soul, would shed light on the true emotion of the smile.

Or frown, in this instance.

The green, emotion-laden eyes before her were thick with regret. Edward cast his eyes downward, and his beautiful lashes interrupted the emerald view.

"Edward?" Bella was confused. It was very unusual for him to act this way, like he was hiding something. If something were bothering him, he would usually talk to Bella about it. Likewise, if something were bothering her, he encouraged her to share it with him. They were in a relationship – a partnership, he would explain. If something was upsetting one of them, it was upsetting both of them.

"Edward?" she questioned again.

"I'm sorry," he croaked, his voice weighted with unspoken emotions. "I can't. I just can't."

He stood abruptly, the bed springing with the jerkiness of his movements, and he strode to the door, his footsteps heavy and his back rounded.

"Edward!" Bella reached out to him, but he evaded her grasp with a sharp tug of his arm.

"What-"

"You're not worth it, Bella. Don't you get it? Having you as my sad, pathetic excuse of a girlfriend is not worth it." Edward's face was dark, and his eyes were clouded with anger.

"Why I decided to waste my time with you when I have beautiful women flocking to me is beyond my comprehension."

Edward's words tore into Bella's heart. She had known this day would come, she had known that Edward would eventually see her for the girl she really was. What she hadn't realized was how much it would hurt. She had become too trusting of the copper-haired beauty. His face, his scent, his body language – everything put her at ease. He had her in such a vulnerable position, with her heart wide open for him.

With motives more cruel than Bella could ever have imagined, Edward was taking the opportunity to cut her down, to put her back in her place. She wasn't meant to have a lover; she was too undeserving to have an equal to love.

Fat, hot tears trailed down her face as sobs tore from her chest, and she collapsed to her knees next to her bed. Though she knew Edward's reasoning behind leaving her was legitimate, the pain she felt was unimaginable.

"Edward, please." She would beg for him if it meant that he would stay. Who was she kidding? He already had one foot out the door.

"Goodbye."

"Edward," she wailed. "Edward!"

*************

Bella bolted upright and clutched her chest as she struggled to breathe. Her room was dark and empty. The little clock on her nightstand blinked a red four-thirty AM. Her head was swimming with the residue of her vivid dream, the images of Edward's unhappy face burning in her memory.

She knew that after a dream – nightmare – like that, she wouldn't be able to fall back asleep. Just closing her eyes brought back the haunting vision of her begging on her knees for Edward to stay. She rolled over and grabbed her cell phone from her nightstand, flipping it open.

Edward was at the station working right now until about eight AM, so he was definitely up. He had told her to text him any time she wanted, and while he had reassured her that it was more than okay, she still hesitated. She wanted nothing more than to hear from him right now; a text would bring a small amount of comfort and hopefully help her shake off the remains of her nightmare.

_Hi. How's work?_

Short and sweet. Bella didn't want to seem eager and obsessive. She shoved her phone under her comforter as she waited for a response.

Not a minute later, she heard a muffled beeping that indicated an incoming text.

_Hello, love. Work's slow. Just a few calls. What are you doing up?_

Bella hesitated again, unsure as to whether or not she should tell Edward the truth.

_Couldn't sleep. I can't wait to see you again._

Bella's heart pounded nervously as she hit the send button and waited for Edward's reply. She couldn't believe how forward she had been in that text. Secretly, it thrilled her.

Her phone beeped, and she immediately flipped it open.

_I wish I were with you right now. I could tuck you in. _

Bella giggled at the silly image that appeared in her head and quickly sent back a reply.

_I guess I'll just have to settle for seeing you when you get off. Goodnight, Edward._

She placed her phone on her nightstand and flipped off the light. Her eyes were just closing when her phone beeped, and she squirmed in bed with delight. The bright screen of the phone irritated her sensitive eyes, but she could make out Edward's message quite clearly.

_Sweet dreams, love._

Bella could almost hear Edward's deep, silky voice whisper those soothing words, and her eyes drifted shut.

*******************

"Bella! Get your little butt down here!" Emmett's loud voice bellowed up the stairs to Bella's bedroom. She was just finishing up her hair.

"I'm coming!" she yelled back. She slipped on her converse and hurried down the stairs, careful to watch her footing. She joined Edward, Emmett and Rose in the foyer, unable to control the grin that spread across her face as she made eye contact with Edward.

Rose had her arms wrapped around Emmett's large waist, and her head was resting on his bulky chest. Long-legged and blonde, Rosalie was Emmett's opposite, yet she complemented him perfectly. When Bella had the chance, she liked to sit back and watch them interact with each other. They really were a beautiful couple.

"Hello, beautiful." Edward kissed Bella's cheek and held up a basket. "I hope you're hungry; I've brought lunch."

Bella giggled and stole a glance at Emmett. It was absolutely ridiculous to believe that someone with an appetite like his would find enough food in that average-sized picnic basket.

"Don't worry, Bells, I've been snacking. There's plenty in there. Let me just grab my – crap! Bella, could you run this to the mailbox? I completely forgot about it!"

Emmett held up a plain white envelope that was already addressed and stamped. "Taxes," he mumbled sheepishly.

Bella rolled her eyes and snatched the envelope from Emmett's hand before dashing off to the mailbox. Unfortunately for Emmett, the mail had already come, and his letter would have to wait another day. She grabbed the small pile of mail from the box, put Emmett's letter in for tomorrow, and headed back inside.

"You're out of luck, Em. Looks like the mail has already come. It'll have to be picked up tomorrow." Bella tossed the mail on the counter and grabbed her jacket. As the mail spread out, she caught a glimpse of an envelope addressed to her. Nerves settled in her stomach, and her heart picked up in pace as she realized that it was probably from one of the colleges she had applied to. As much as she wanted to tear open the letter, she couldn't - not with everyone here. If she were going to be rejected, she would rather face it alone.

"Come on, let's get going before it decides to rain."

The four made their way to a local park in Edward's Volvo, with Edward driving of course. Bella found it humorous how protective Edward was over his car – it was quite endearing, really.

"So, I got the strangest thing today. A package was left for me on our front porch. It was a stuffed animal – a phoenix, I think, with all the stuffing ripped out. There was no return address or letter. Pretty creepy." Edward frowned as he retold the story, and his normally bright green eyes were clouded and hard.

Bella's heart caught in her throat as soon as she heard what had been in the package. A phoenix, it was blatantly obvious! It was Renee. She had somehow not only figured out where Bella was, but also with whom she was spending her time. By being with Edward, she was putting him in danger, and he didn't deserve to be dragged into this mess.

"Earth to Bella," Emmett called from the back seat.

"Huh?" Bella blinked as she returned back to the conversation around her.

"We were just asking if you cared which side of the park we went to." Bella felt like all eyes were on her, and she shrank back in her seat.

"Um…no. Either is fine."

After what felt like hours to Bella, they made it to the park, and as soon as Edward had stopped the car, she jumped out and inhaled the cool, clear air around her in an attempt to calm herself. This was all spiralling out of control, and she felt like she was spiralling right along with it.

"Bella, are you okay?" She hadn't even realized Edward was holding her arm as she continued to breathe deeply. Well, that was embarrassing. As she continued to inhale like an idiot, the most gorgeous man alive looked at her like she had three heads.

"Car sick," she quickly lied. She pulled her arm from Edward's grasp and moved away. She couldn't lead him on anymore. If she were going to keep him safe, then she needed to distance herself.

Bella didn't allow herself to look back at Edward's face as she walked away. She knew she had hurt him, and she couldn't bring herself to see it displayed on his face.

She walked ahead of the others, only stumbling a few times. Tears pricked at her eyes when she realized that had she not been pushing Edward away, had he been walking next to her now, he would have caught her. Like he'd promised.

"Here's a spot," she called out, her voice gravelly.

She took the large quilt from Rosalie and spread it out on the grass. Keeping busy kept her mind from wandering too far, and it kept her emotions at bay. Once the quilt was spread out, she plopped down on a corner and crossed her legs underneath her. Much to her dismay, Edward sat down right beside her, but didn't put his arm around her like he normally would.

Rosalie unpacked the food and organized it in the center. There were sandwiches, carrots, grapes, crackers, sodas and chips. Any other time, Bella would have indulged herself in the delicious food, but today her appetite was missing. She blindly reached for a sandwich and a few carrots and threw them on the paper plate in front of her.

The casual conversation between Emmett and Rosalie created a dim noise in her ears – not quite loud enough to block out the fact that Edward was not partaking in the light banter being thrown around between the two. Bella's plan to push Edward away, for his own safety and well-being, was already working.

"Bella." Edward's warm breath blew across her cheek as he spoke her name. She jumped slightly and inched away from the suffocating closeness.

"Um, yes?" She kept her face turned away.

"Are you okay? You're quiet today, you seem upset." Edward moved his hand to tuck back a piece of hair that had fallen in Bella's face, but she ducked her head so Edward couldn't reach.

"Fine, really."

If Bella knew Edward as well as she thought she did, she knew his perfectly shaped lips would be stretched downward into a frown, and the deep furrow in his brow, his telltale sign of frustration, would be visible.

"Hm, alright." It was clear by Edward's tone and lack of response that he wasn't convinced, but Bella kept her mouth shut.

"Well," he continued, "I have a favour to ask of you. My parents' annual charity gala is in three weeks. Normally, I go stag, keep my whiskey glass full, and indulge all the pushy mothers in a dance with their single daughters. I was hoping this year…well I was hoping this year that you would be my date."

Earlier in the day, Bella would have jumped at the chance to go to such an event with Edward. A charaity gala, a fancy date, a grown-up event, whatever you wanted to call it, Bella would have loved it. But now...now, who knew if she would even be here in three weeks? Or alive. Either way, she wouldn't allow herself to be selfish enough to drag Edward into this mess with her. She would just need to continue to push him away.

"A gala? Does that mean dancing?" Her voice cracked, and she cleared her throat. "I'm not sure that's a good idea."

She didn't even venture a gaze up at Edward; she couldn't allow him to see the tears in her eyes. Her heart screamed at her to throw caution to the wind and just say yes, but her mind wouldn't allow it.

And so she turned from him and ignored the ripping pain in her heart.

*********

They had only been on their picnic for about a half an hour when a small smattering of raindrops turned into a heavy downpour. The group quickly gathered up their belongings and made a mad dash for the car. This time, Bella slid into the back seat with Rosalie and urged her brother to take the front.

"Your tree trunk legs will be more comfortable up there," she argued.

Bella thought that sitting further away from Edward would make thing easier, but it was quite the opposite. Sitting directly behind him, she could see his shoulders tense as he made a turn, his unruly bronze hair peek out from behind the headrest and his masculine, strong hands grip the steering wheel as if that contact were the only thing keeping him sane.

It was as if the walls of the car were closing in on Bella. She didn't think that pushing Edward away would be so hard; she hadn't counted on her feelings for him to be so strong. She kept telling herself that she was doing this out of necessity.

Bella fought hard to keep it together for the rest of the car ride. The burning of tears was intense, the need to relieve herself of the emotional tension forceful. She needed out of this car. Now.

They had barely rolled to a stop when Bella, for the second time that day, jumped from the car. Trying to keep appearances normal, she walked briskly to the house and headed straight to the kitchen to pour herself a glass of water. The plan had been for the group to watch a movie together after the picnic, and as far as she knew, that was still the plan.

Rosalie, Emmett and Edward entered the house about thirty seconds after Bella had and followed her path into the kitchen. Thirty seconds alone was not nearly enough to compose herself, and she didn't turn around to acknowledge their presence when she heard them enter the room.

"So, a movie…" Rosalie started, awkwardly standing in the middle of the kitchen with her arms crossed. Bella recognized that action of self-protection all too well.

"Yeah." Emmett rubbed the back of his head, clearly frustrated. "Why don't you and Edward go pick one out? Bella and I will be in in a minute."

As soon as Rosalie and Edward had left, Emmett turned to Bella. "What's going on? Just the other day, you and Edward couldn't look any happier, and now you're giving him the cold shoulder. Don't think I didn't notice. You'd have to be blind not to notice how you acted today. What happened?"

Bella continued to keep a tight hold on her water glass as she turned around to look at Emmett. She kept her gaze controlled and her voice even. "Nothing. Absolutely –"

"Bullshit, Bella!" Emmett hissed. "Something _has_ happened to make you act like this. I'm your brother, why can't you tell me?"

Bella flinched at Emmett's harsh tone. It scared her; the yelling was so much like Renee. She needed, for her sanity as well as for the sake of Rosalie and Edward in the other room, to get this situation back in control.

"Em, I'm okay. I'm just a little emotional today. Can we please just leave it at that?"

A tense few seconds passed, and Emmett released a huge sigh, rubbing the back of his head again. "Alright. But promise me that you'll come to me if you want to talk. Okay?"

Bella nodded her head eagerly, thankful for the relatively easy resolution. "I promise." She moved to join Edward and Rosalie in the living room when Emmett called out to her.

"Hey, kiddo, there's a letter here for you. Are you going to open it?"

Right, the letter.

Still with a strong hold on her glass of water, Bella slowly ripped open the plain and innocent-looking white envelope. The more she revealed of it, the more she knew that it wasn't from a college.

She pulled out the contents of the envelope; a single piece of paper, folded to fit. Her heart was pounding in her chest, and she brought the water to her mouth with a shaky hand. Her eyes traveled first to the bottom of the letter to confirm her worst fear.

It was signed, Renee.

The content of the letter was simple. Just one line.

_I've found you._

Black spots swam in Bella's vision as her breath came in panicked gasps. The glass dropped from her hand and shattered on the tile floor, and she stumbled backwards before sliding against the counter to the ground. A shard of glass pierced her hand and sliced her leg, but she didn't feel the pain. She only felt terror.

Renee had found out where Bella had run off to and was coming, most likely to kill her. And now Edward was in danger as well. God, she was such an idiot! She should have known that she couldn't run from her past. She should have known that no matter how hard she tried to keep this from everyone, it was going to find a way to rear its ugly head.

"Bella!" Emmett was by her side in a second, careful to maneuver around the broken glass. He grabbed her hand and sandwiched it between his own. "Shit, Bells. You're bleeding."

Emmett grabbed Bella's leg so that he could wrap a towel around it, but Bella, lost in her hysterical and panic-filled mind, kicked until she pulled free.

"No!" she sobbed.

"You're bleeding! I have to wrap your leg."

"No, please. Don't touch me." The panic Bella felt when Emmett's hand circled around her ankle overwhelmed her. She felt trapped, like Renee was already there and breathing down her neck. Physical restriction just made it worse, made the feeling unbearable. It was like the feeling Bella got when she watched people suffocate or drown in a movie. She herself wasn't suffocating, but just watching the character in the movie made her feel like she couldn't breathe, even though she was fine.

"Bella, what's wrong?" Emmett was beginning to panic now. Bella could hear it in the rising pitch of his voice.

She looked him dead in the eye, chocolate brown meeting hazel. "She's here." Her voice trembled, and her face scrunched as the dam holding back her tears from earlier broke.

"Who? Who's here?"

"Oh God, Emmett." Bella sobbed. "She's – she's actually here. She's going to kill me." Bella gasped, trying to get air into her lungs. "She's going to kill Edward."

Sobs shook Bella's body, and everything she else she said became incomprehensible.

"Christ, Bella. You're really bleeding." Emmett's pants had blood stains on them, as did his hands. He pulled Bella into him and cradled her to his chest. "Edward!"

As soon as Emmett pulled her close, Bella began to struggle. She didn't like feeling enclosed and ensnared within his arms. She wanted to feel like she could run away or fight back, should Renee appear.

There was a dull roar in her ears that overpowered the panicked tones of Emmett's voice. She could hear her heart beating, pulsing in her ears as it threatened to fly straight out of her chest. Her breaths came in wheezy and uneven bursts, and she clutched at her chest, hoping to quell the uncomfortable feeling of panic and suffocation. Despite the slickness of her skin, due to tears and sweat, Emmett kept a strong hold on her.

"Shhh, Bella. Look at me. Look at me, kiddo." Bella tried her hardest to listen to Emmett, but her fight–or–flight response was strong and hard to ignore.

"Can you tell me who's coming?"

Bella felt a fresh surge of panic rise up within her as she thought back to the letter still on the floor.

"Renee."

And then the screaming started.

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_AN: *hides behind computer* Please don't kill me. Chapter thirteen is in the works, and it's really the climax of this whole mess. Major drama. So, review and I'll work extra hard to get it out early to you guys! And for those of you who checked out Essence, thanks! I really appreciate the encouragment. I'm thinking of trying another one._

_-lmbrtvll_


	13. Chapter 13

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 13

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

**_AN: Huge thanks to Lisa and Blakely for whipping this chapter into shape. Their input is invaluable. Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter, I was amazed by the response. I tried to respond to as many as I could, but know that I read and appreciate every single one._**

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_

_~The fences sway_

"Edward! Come on in, dude. How was work?" Emmett ushered him into the house with a grin and a clap on the back.

"Never a dull moment, Em. Never a dull moment." Edward had just finished a long shift at the station, and even after a nice nine-hour nap, his mind was still reeling a bit. Work had been eventful, to say the least. They had gotten call after call, most of them minor. The few that weren't would haunt Edward's dreams for the next few nights. He knew that from experience.

Emmett nodded in understanding. "Oh, you've brought goodies!" he exclaimed upon sighting the large picnic basket in Edward's hand. "Rose, he brought goodies!" Edward threw the blonde a wave as she entered the room at the mention of her name.

"Hey, Edward. Ignore the doofus – he thinks with his stomach. Bella should be down soon, and then we can head out. Much longer and this one over here," she jerked her thumb at Emmett, " is going to break down and jump headfirst into that basket, and we'll be left with the crumbs."

"I'm a growing boy!" Emmett stretched and rubbed his stomach. "But she's right, any longer, and I _will_ be taking a dip into that basket."

Emmett turned toward the stairs and cupped his hands around his mouth. "Bella! Get your cute butt down here!" His large mouth earned a smack on the back of the head from Rosalie.

"Babe, someone had to light a fire under her. That girl is so slow."

Edward just chuckled, but stopped short when he realized that he had butterflies. He smiled at the sensation. It was rare for him to be nervous while waiting for a girl, especially a girl he had known for so long. Bella was very special to him.

He thought back to last night and his texted conversation with her. He knew Bella was still feeling insecure about the relationship, and she usually followed his lead. It made him giddy to think that she felt comfortable enough to initiate the conversation. One of the messages in particular sent a rush of adrenaline pumping through his body; _I miss you_. Who knew that three simple and seemingly insignificant words could affect him so strongly?

Part of him wished that that text had been a little different, miss being replaced with love. He was fighting tooth and nail to move slowly for Bella, but his heart was a force to be reckoned with.

Edward looked over to where his best friend and girlfriend stood, and a twinge of jealousy struck his chest. Rosalie was resting her head on Emmett's stocky chest, looking completely content wrapped in his arms. The couple exuded love, a sense of longevity and the hope that soul mates really might exist. Edward's heart ached to even share a piece of that with the sweet, beautiful girl upstairs. She might not know it yet, but he knew that she completed him.

The sight of Bella, glowing, flushed and bounding down the stairs, broke Edward from his reverie. He caught her gaze and grinned back at the large smile that spread across her perfect face. As she approached him, the butterflies in his stomach increased exponentially.

"Hello, beautiful." He bent down and pressed his lips agaisnt her smooth cheek, feeling the heat radiating from beneath her skin as her blush spread. He pulled back and held up the large picnic basket in his hand. "I hope you're hungry; I've brought lunch."

Edward found it adorable that Bella giggled and stole a glance at her brother. She was apparently thinking the same thing Rosalie had been earlier, and the entire room caught on.

Emmett chuckled and rolled his eyes in good nature. "Don't worry, Bells, I've been snacking. There's plenty in there. Let me just grab my – crap! Bella, could you run this to the mailbox? I completely forgot about it!"

Edward's body silently groaned in protest as the warmth of Bella's body dissipated when she broke contact. He watched her through the window, mentally spurring her on to move faster so that he could take her back in his arms.

Nothing could make Edward feel better than holding Bella in his arms, feeling the slight warmth her body created against his, listening to the even sounds of her breathing. Especially after his shift last night.

Bella moved quickly, tossing the mail on the counter and grabbing her jacket. Edward noticed her eyes fixed on the small pile of mail, and her whole demeanour changed. He knew she had applied to a few colleges – he had even helped her with one of the applications. Emmett had been one of the driving factors in Bella's decision to apply and had been the one to make a call to her high school in Phoenix on her behalf. The school hadn't put up much of a fight with awarding Bella full credit for her four years there, seeing as she had never missed a day and had a 4.0 GPA.

Edward didn't say anything to Bella about the mail; he didn't want to push her.

Bella grabbed Edward's hand and started pulling him. "Come on, let's get going before it decides to rain."

The tension in the car was thick as they drove to the park. Edward's hands tightened on the steering wheel as he fought with himself to say something. It would be entirely for him to ask Bella what was bothering her in front of everyone else. He wasn't sure if anyone had caught on to her change in mood, but to Edward it was as clear as day. Her movements were sharper and strained, her face was pulled tight in a grimace, even when she smiled, and she was quiet.

If he didn't break the stillness though, he was going to go crazy. The silence of the tension was so loud, it was deafening. He could hear it pulsing in his ears, closing in on him. He needed to say _something_. He cleared his throat and spoke without even thinking.

"So, I got the strangest thing today. A package was left for me on our front porch. It was a stuffed animal – a phoenix, I think, with all the stuffing ripped out. There was no return address or letter. Pretty creepy." Edward frowned as he glanced over at Bella briefly and saw her eyes glaze over. Fuck, that was a bad choice of story.

"That's pretty messed up, dude," Emmett mused. "What did you do with it?'

"Threw it out." Edward kept his answer short, indicating that he was done with that particular conversation. "What side of the park do we want to head for?"

Both Rosalie and Emmett shrugged in indifference. "Let Bella choose. The park used to be her favourite place here."

Edward turned to Bella. "Love?"

Bella didn't respond, and she continued to stare off in front of her.

"Earth to Bella," Emmett called from the back seat.

Edward could literally see conscious awareness of her surroundings seep back into her body. "Huh?"

"We were just asking if you cared which side of the park we went to."

"Um… no. Either is fine." Bella grimaced, looking slightly green, and Edward didn't push her.

Edward breathed a sigh of relief as they pulled into the small parking lot adjacent to the park. Maybe once they were all out of the car, things would ease slightly. His hopes fell as Bella jumped from the car as soon as he shifted into park, and he restrained himself from following her out. It was a constant battle for him to not pressure or rush her. It was the hardest thing he had ever had to do, but he knew it was all worth it. He would do anything for her.

As she stepped away from the group, she seemed to be struggling to breathe, which immediately concerned Edward. Any battle to give Bella her space was halted as he quickly made his way over to make sure that she was okay.

Bella stumbled slightly, and Edward grabbed her elbow to steady her. The last thing they needed was for her clumsiness to strike. "Bella," he said, pausing to choose his words carefully. He knew she didn't welcome or react well to an overbearing presence. "Are you okay?"

She visibly gulped and pulled her arm from Edward's grip. "Car sick."

Edward wanted to scream with frustration. He _knew_ she was lying. Something was causing her to pull away from him, and he hesitated to make a move for fear of making things worse. He loved her too much to let her do this, he knew that much.

"Here's a spot." Bella's rough voice broke up his thoughts, and he trudged down the hill to the unnecessarily shaded spot Bella had chosen. He set the basket down in the middle of the blanket, and like a stubborn child, sat down next to Bella. He didn't touch her; he felt that would be going too far. But he did want to convey somehow that he wasn't going to be scared or pushed away, and he thought sitting next to her did just that.

"Bella," he breathed.

She mumbled a response, and he was thankful that she at least acknowledged him. With Emmett and Rosalie holding a conversation of their own on the other side of the blanket, Edward felt it might be okay to gently question Bella.

"Are you okay? You're quiet today, you seem upset." His hand unconsciously traveled upward to tuck back a stray piece of hair.

She ducked from his hand, sending an uncomfortable and unexpected wave of hurt straight through his heart, and left him with a short answer. "Fine, really."

Edward didn't believe Bella, but he wouldn't tell her that. "Hm, alright." He frowned, but continued. Bella needed to know that he wouldn't be pushed away.

"Well, I have a favor to ask of you. My parents' annual charity gala is in three weeks. Normally, I go stag, keep my whiskey glass full, and indulge all the pushy mothers in a dance with their single daughters. I was hoping this year…well, I was hoping this year that you would be my date."

The seconds between his question and her answer stretched on into what felt like hours. He could read the uncertainty in Bella's eyes; he could practically feel the struggle she was having with herself. He wanted to tell her that it was okay to say yes, that he got excited at the mere thought of dressing up with her and escorting her to such an event.

_Please don't shut me out, baby. _

"A gala? Does that mean dancing?" Edward winced when her voice cracked, and his hands itched to reach out and caress her cheek so that he might soothe away a bit of her pain.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea." She turned away from him, and Edward swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat. His heart ached fiercely, and his vision blurred momentarily and unexpectedly with tears. He would back off for now. He didn't know how long he could hold back his emotions, but as soon as he was back in control, he would confront Bella.

Something wet hit Edward on the forehead, and he looked up to see a darkening sky, the ominous clouds seeming to warn of more than just rain. Another drop hit him on the nose and then another on his hand, and soon enough, the sporadic drizzle had evolved into a deluge.

Edward randomly grabbed plates and food, as did everyone else, and ran back to the car. To his surprise, when he slid into the driver's seat and turned, he found Emmett sitting next to him. Quite a shock, considering he was expecting tiny Bella.

He made it to the Swan house in record time and watched with concern as Bella jumped from the car again. He slowly followed Emmett inside, and they all gathered in the kitchen, a little wet but still mostly clean.

"So, a movie…" Rosalie was quick to remind everyone of the plans they had made for after the picnic.

"Why don't you and Edward go pick one out? Bella and I will be in in a minute." Edward opened his mouth to speak, knowing what Emmett intended to do. He was going to confront Bella, and Edward wasn't sure how to feel. Part of him wanted to support Emmett; Bella needed to talk to _someone_. But the other, more selfish part of him wanted that someone to be himself. He was her boyfriend for Christ's sake. She should be able to come to him. He rubbed the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger and soundlessly followed Rosalie into the living room.

"Edward, I'm worried." Rosalie was slouched on the middle of the couch, her face buried in her hands. "I've been trying so hard to get Bella to open up, to form some sort of a relationship with her, and it's been going so well. But something isn't right. Call it a woman's intuition, but I know Bella is hiding something. I can practically feel the terror rolling off her, and it scares me. I'm worried that she's going to do something stupid."

Edward sat down next to Rosalie and imitated her posture, groaning into his hands. "I know," he moaned. I've been trying to talk to her about it, but she's pushing me away. Fuck, Rose! I'm her boyfriend, and she doesn't even feel like she can come to me!"

He breathed deeply, trying to calm himself, and almost broke down as he felt Rose's hand rub his back.

"Emmett will figure it out," she soothed. "Come on, let's choose a movie."

As they kneeled in front of the DVD cabinet, Edward could slightly hear the muffled tones of two voices arguing. He desperately wished that he could hear more clearly; arguing most likely meant that Emmett had gotten a lot more than "I'm fine" or "nothing" out of Bella.

It was the sound of glass shattering that brought Rosalie and Edward to their feet. Neither of them moved. Edward's heart was in his throat, and his instincts as a paramedic urged him to follow the sound of chaos and assess the damage. A hand pulling on his wrist urged him to stop.

"Edward, they're fighting," Rosalie whispered. "We should give them some privacy,"

She was right. Neither Bella nor Emmett would appreciate him barging in on them while they were fighting. But something – his instincts, his heart, he didn't know – was screaming at him that something was wrong. It was as if he was trapped between the proverbial rock and hard place; his mind screamed at him to run into that kitchen, but he couldn't, not when he knew that what Rosalie had said was right.

"Edward!" Emmett bellowed, the panic that laced his voice crystal clear.

The fear that he felt at that moment erased any doubt he had in his mind about interrupting Bella and Emmett in the kitchen. The piercing female scream he heard seconds later urged him to move faster. He was running so quickly, he almost kicked Emmett and skidded to a halt against the refrigerator to avoid hitting him.

He almost puked, and he was an experienced paramedic. But nothing could ever prepare him for the scene he had literally run right into. Bella was slumped against a lower cabinet adjacent to the kitchen sink, bleeding heavily from a leg wound and a shard of glass that was still in her hand.

Her face was ashen and covered in a thin sheen of sweat, making the beautiful, strong girl Edward had seen days earlier look sickly. Tear tracks were visible against her pale complexion as unshed tears sat in her wide, terrified eyes. Her chest rose and fell rapidly and unevenly, her inhales coming in wheezy gasps and her exhales silent. Her uninjured hand was clutching the collar of her shirt, which she periodically tugged at as if it might ease her breathing.

Emmett… God, Emmett. He was kneeling in front of Bella, obviously unable to get closer to her. His pants were bloodstained, beyond salvageable, and he had bloody fingerprints dotting his face. Blood was smeared like syrup on the off-white tile floor on which they both sat, streaked with handprints and shoe marks.

It _looked_ like there was a lot of blood on the floor, and by most people's standards, there was. But Edward's training told him that only a moderate amount had been spilled, not dangerous. Yet. It also told him the painful-looking wound on Bella's leg would undeniably need stitches, as the gaping sides would most definitely not fuse together on their own.

What worried him more than the wound and the troubling blood loss was Bella's mental state. She was practically incoherent, unseeing of the world around her. Her beautiful brown eyes, while filled with terror, processed nothing of what was going on around her. In reality, it was Emmett who sat in front of her offering help, but her mind clearly saw something else. Edward couldn't imagine Bella screaming in unadulterated panic because of her brother's presence.

It was a full-blown panic attack complete with symptoms that Edward knew all too well. He had taken a few psychology classes in school, one being a course in psychopathology – or psychological disorders. He knew Bella was showing classic symptoms of a severe anxiety attack. What he didn't know was how to treat it.

"Edward," Emmett finally spoke. "Call Carlisle."

Edward hesitated, his gaze still frozen on Bella as she struggled to breathe. He inched forward slightly, his fingers itching to touch her, to comfort her as he would one of his patients in distress.

"Maybe I –"

"Edward! She is not comprehending anything we say, I've already tried," Emmett screamed. "Call Carlisle!" Emmett's tone did absolutely nothing to help the situation; Edward was pretty sure that it only increased the acuteness of Bella's symptoms. However, it did succeed in knocking Edward out of his stupor.

He grabbed his cell phone from his back pocket and hit speed dial "one". His father answered on the second ring.

"Edward, how was your –"

"Dad!" Edward interrupted.

"Edward, what's going on? I can barely hear you. Someone is screaming, what's wrong?" Carlisle's highly attuned sense for disaster and trauma immediately picked up on the chaos in the background.

"I'm at Emmett's. We need you, Dad. Bella's hysterical; she's having a severe panic attack, and she's bleeding pretty badly from a leg wound. I –"

"I'm on my way. Try to calm her as best you can, but don't threaten her. Be careful." Carlisle hung up, and Edward threw his phone towards the living room, only looking up when he heard a yelp.

Rosalie was standing in the doorway, an elegant hand covering her mouth. Edward didn't know how long she had been standing there, but from the looks of things, it had been a while. "I'll go wait for your dad outside."

Edward nodded his head in agreement. It was probably best for Rosalie to step outside for fresh air; she was looking uneasy.

He turned his attention back to Emmett and Bella and sighed as Rosalie left . He hated feeling so useless. That was part of the reason he decided to become a paramedic, not just for field experience before med school, but so he could help.

He kneeled next to Emmett, making sure to move slowly so that he wouldn't frighten Bella any more than she already was. "We should really get some sort of pressure on her leg."

"I can't fucking touch her, Edward. My sister won't let me touch her. Damn it! I don't know what to do anymore." Emmett was pulling at his hair, the dark brown now tinted red from his bloodstained hands. "It's killing me to just sit here and watch her freak out. It's my job to make sure that my baby sister is okay, and I can't even do that."

Emmett wiped hastily at the tears that slid down his cheeks, only succeeding in worsening the mess on his face. Edward had to admit, Emmett looked pretty damn scary right now, covered in blood, hair sticking upright, his face puffy from crying. He wore a look Edward recognized from the more brutal scenes he'd been called to. Desperation, fear, heartbreak. He imagined he wore the same expression.

A fresh wail of agony pierced through Edward's thoughts, and his eyes darted to Bella, curled in even tighter upon herself. "Please," she whispered. "Please don't hurt him."

There was obviously no response from Bella's imaginary opponent, and the room stood silent except for the disturbing sounds of Bella's strangled breathing. Edward could practically see her heart pounding viciously in her chest, and he knew that if they didn't calm her soon, there would be major consequences. The human body could only sustain such extreme vitals for so long.

"Bella," Edward spoke calmly. He inched forward slightly, holding out his hand to her, just like when they were younger. Those few times Edward couldn't catch Bella in time, he would always hold out a hand to help her up. He wanted to help her up now, help her out of this pit of hysteria and panic. He could kick himself for missing this, for not catching Bella in time. The only way he could right this was to help her up. She had never refused before, he only hoped she wouldn't this time.

Edward's hand stayed unmoving for what felt like hours but in reality was only minutes. It also stayed empty. Edward tried to move closer, but Bella screamed and kicked her legs, causing a fresh wave of blood to spill from her wound. She shuddered with bone-racking chills even though she was sweating, and Edward couldn't tell if that was from the panic attack or shock.

Tears pricked at his eyes as his frustration bore down on him. He was struggling to remain calm; he was struggling to remain patient. He was struggling. Period.

"H-hurts," Bella whimpered.

"What? What, Bella? Please tell me what hurts, baby," Edward begged.

"Please, Renee. Stop. I can't. I can't breath in here. So hot."

_Renee?_

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_ Please review. You guys really give me great feedback and ideas and contrary to what you may believe, I do write faster._


	14. Chapter 14

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 14

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

**_AN: Huge apologies for the delay. School is kicking my butt. I've never had as much work in all four years of college than I have had in this semester. Please forgive me for taking so long. HUGE thanks to Lisa, my awesome beta whom I adore like no other. She's too cool. _**

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Bella shifted onto her side and pressed her cheek to the cool tile. Edward and Emmett still sat helplessly in front of her, waiting for Carlisle to arrive. Her arms trembled as they grasped at anything they could – the tile, her shirt, air.

"Carlisle's here!" Rosalie burst into the kitchen, eliciting a fresh round of incomprehensible mumblings, sobbing and choked screaming from Bella.

Edward's body almost sagged in relief when he heard Rosalie's announcement. He had hoped that Bella might wear herself out, but her terror still ran strong, her pulse still beat wildly, and her breathing still cycled unevenly and inefficiently. Though she lay limp on the floor, her eyes glazed over, she still reacted to the danger she believed was surrounding her.

"Boys?" Carlisle's voice was concerned but not judging. He didn't wait for an invitation into the kitchen and positioned himself directly in front of Bella, making Edward and Emmett back up a bit. He made sure not to touch Bella or to sit too close to her.

"Please," Bella begged the new presence. "Don't hurt me. Leave us alone."

Edward watched, unable to turn away, as his father kneeled lower. "Bella, sweetheart, can you look at me?" he whispered.

Bella's whimpers grew in ferocity, and each cry was like a strike to Edward's heart. He cringed yet made no move to leave.

"Bella," his father tried again, "It's Carlisle. I need you to calm down. Can you do that for me?"

His voice was soft and soothing. It was the same voice, Edward recognized, as the one Carlisle had used to comfort him after a nightmare and the one he used to reassure his patients. It was the voice Edward tried to emulate as he talked to his own patients, and it usually worked for him. But not this time. Nor did Edward think it would work for Carlisle.

"Dad, we've already tried that."

"Hush, Edward." Carlisle's face was somber with concentration. He brushed back the pale blonde hair that had fallen into his eye with a strong and calm hand, his eyes never leaving Bella's form.

"In my bag is a syringe and a vial of Lorazepam. I need four milligrams, Edward."

He did as his father asked. His movements felt slow, as if he were trying to move through molasses, and his mind was fuzzy. Numb. He handed the full needle to Carlisle and backed away. His heart wouldn't let him leave, and deep down he knew he couldn't. Bella might not know he was here, but he couldn't leave her. His mind, though scared and overwhelmed, wanted to run from the house and find a refuge to process what exactly had happened.

Syringe in hand, Carlisle slowly inched towards Bella, constantly murmuring soft words of comfort. If only it helped.

"Please, please don't. I'm sorry. I promise, I'll be good. Please, Renee." Bella's agitation grew the closer Carlisle got to her, and she began to thrash about in the confined space she had backed herself into.

"Edward, I'm going to need you to help me. You'll have to hold her down so I can give her this without hurting her. Emmett, you might want to grab her upper body. The less she moves, the easier this will be on all of us."

Edward swallowed thickly and nodded as he struggled to tell himself that this was his _job_. He needed to block out Bella's face; he needed to tell himself that this was just another patient. He needed to do this so that he could help her, because that was what he did – he helped people.

He found himself murmuring soothing noises unconsciously as he slid forward on the floor.

"Nooo," Bella wailed.

"Shh, baby. It's just me. I'm going to keep you safe." Tears threatened to spill over and his voice cracked, but Edward continued to move forward. He grabbed one ankle and then the other, tensing his arms as Bella's struggling escalated. She kicked, and her wailing turned into screams.

Emmett stepped up and grabbed her upper body, enveloping her in his large arms. They wrapped around her chest and shoulders, and one of his hands found itself tangled in her damp and messy hair, smoothing it. She fought against him but couldn't shake his burly frame.

Edward bit the inside of his cheek hard enough to taste blood to fight back the burning of his tears and the large lump of emotions that had knotted in the back of his throat. With renewed determination, he let his right hand loosen for a moment to reposition it. Seconds later, he felt a swift kick to the jaw, and blinding pain followed.

"Edward! Are you okay? Do you have her?"

"Fine, Em. I'm fine. Let's just get this over with." Edward could taste the metallic tang of blood in his mouth, but that was the least of his worries. He'd had worse, especially with Emmett as a best friend.

This time, Edward kept a strong grip on Bella's legs, and though she kicked with what was probably all of her strength, he barely felt it. Edward was surprised she still had the energy to fight so strongly against him. Then again, she wasn't really fighting against _him_.

With the ease and finesse of a seasoned physician, Carlisle quickly administered the sedative to Bella. Edward watched in morbid fascination as his girlfriend gradually stopped moving, her kicks and twists slowing into movements that resembled random jolts, which eventually lessened into exhausted twitches. What really dug the claws into his heart were the inhuman noises Bella made. The screams died down, as did her wailing and begging, until she lay on the floor with a throaty whimper.

Carlisle, looking older than he had in ages, released a sigh of tension. "I think it best if I take Bella to our house. I need to monitor her for any adverse reactions to the Lorazepam. Her wound needs tending to as well. All that can be easily done without exposing her to the chaos of the hospital."

Without waiting for argument, Carlisle scooped Bella into his arms and easily carried her to the car. "Edward, grab my bag please. Emmett, could you ride with Bella in the back?"

Edward wished he had the strength to argue with his father, to tell Emmett to drive his Volvo, and cradle Bella's eerily still body in his arms as they sped off towards home. But he was mentally exhausted, stretched to his limits and eager to get home.

He knew that once Bella was settled comfortably, questions would be asked. There would be confrontations and right now, Emmett was the most likely source for answers.

Edward's fingers drummed the steering wheel impatiently as he followed behind his father's black Mercedes. It should have been _him_ in the car with Bella, not Emmett. Screw the Volvo. It was just a car at this point. The only sounds that filled the cabin of his car were the pounding in his head from the adrenaline and worry, the thundering of the rain on the roof, and his fingers that for the life of him would not stop moving.

He silently urged his father to driver faster, to speed home so that Edward could see his Bella again and continue working on uncovering this nightmare. But the rain was coming down in sheets, the lightning was abundant, and thunder vibrated throughout his car. They couldn't go any faster without running the risk of hydroplaning on the rain-slick roads.

Everything was out of his control. The weather, Bella, fuck, even his own body. He couldn't stop shaking, and even now, in the warmth of his car, tremors ran through him. His heart was still racing as if he had just run ten miles, and his mind was working at a suicidal speed.

After what felt like an eternity, Edward pulled in behind Carlisle's Mercedes in the Cullen driveway and was the first outside. He opened the front door for Emmett, and his father and called out for his mom. He was thankful that Alice had been spending the majority of her time at Jasper's; this was something she didn't need to see. He was also extremely grateful to Rosalie. She had offered, practically argued, to stay behind and clean up the mess in the kitchen. She said she needed to keep busy, she needed to feel useful. When she was finished, she would drive Emmett's car over to the Cullen's and if nothing else, be there for Emmett.

"Edward, dear, your father left in such a rush. What's going on?" Esme's large hazel eyes were wide with worry, and it was clear she was a bit flustered.

"Bella had a panic attack, Mom."

Nothing like being blunt. Esme's hand rose to cover her mouth, and she squeezed Edward's hand in reassurance.

"She also cut herself pretty badly, so it's kind of messy. Dad sedated her, but she's still bleeding. Could you grab some towels? I think we're bringing her to the guest bedroom."

By the time Edward had finished debriefing his mother, Carlisle and Emmett had pulled Bella from the car. Emmett had her in his arms again, and the ugly bite of jealousy nipped in Edward's chest.

"The guest room, Emmett. I'll meet you there once I'm in dry clothing."

Both Carlisle and Edward watched Emmett ascend the stairs with Bella in his arms in complete silence. Edward had so much he wanted to say; he just didn't know where to begin.

"Edward, what the hell happened?" Carlisle ran a hand through his rain-sodden hair and sighed heavily.

"Dad." Edward's voice was weak, gravelly, and heavy with everything he was trying to hold back. He couldn't continue. He shut his eyes and hung his head, feeling confused, worried and ashamed, not knowing which was right.

A gentle hand rested on his shoulder, and Edward looked up into his father's clear green eyes. "Come on, let's go get some answers. I'm sure your mother is already up there fussing around."

Edward chuckled lightly and rubbed the back of his neck to try and ease some of the tension. They climbed the stairs together and split off so that Carlisle could change and Edward could sit with Bella.

Edward slowly swung the door open to the guest room to find Bella already on the bed, Emmett standing in the corner and Esme fiddling worriedly with the large pile of towels she had brought in.

"Oh, Edward! I'm wasn't sure if I should change her into some clean clothing, I mean, I didn't want to hurt her, and – just – oh!" Esme buried her face in her hands, trying to compose herself.

Edward knew that, while she was married to a doctor, his mom didn't do well around large amounts of blood. And, well, with Emmett standing bloodstained in the corner, he couldn't imagine this to be an easy scene to take in.

"Mom, why don't you go and make some of your delicious homemade hot chocolate? We're all a bit wet, and I'm sure that would be a nice warm up?"

Esme nodded gratefully and hurried from the room. Always in her "Mom" mode, she wanted to help and comfort, but when it came down to anything remotely gory, she struggled.

Now Edward could turn his attention to Emmett, who was still standing in the corner. He was still wearing his bloodstained shirt and pants, and Edward could see his tremors from across the room.

"Em-"

"I failed," Emmett interrupted in a hoarse whisper. "I promised her I would protect her. And now my baby sister is lying here, sedated and bleeding."

"Em-" Edward approached his friend "-it's not your fault. You can't blame yourself; Bella wouldn't want you to. Why don't-" Edward glanced down at Emmet's clothing "-why don't you change into something clean? I'm sure you can find something in my room. Once my dad gets in here, I'll meet you downstairs for some hot chocolate."

Emmett gazed down, his face expressionless. "Yeah, I guess I should." He left, and Edward was alone with Bella.

Alone with his guilt. He sat in the armchair and allowed his mélange of emotions to fully overwhelm him. He should have noticed something was wrong. He should have been able to comfort her. So many "should"s.

"Edward, Emmett's waiting for you downstairs. Why don't you go talk to him, see if you can get any answers. I'm just going to get started on her stitches; she won't be waking for a while."

Carlisle was standing in the doorway in dry jeans and a t-shirt, holding his ever-present black bag. He nodded his head towards the stairs, indicating where Edward should head.

As much as he didn't want to leave Bella's side quite yet, Edward didn't have the energy to argue with his father, and he joined Emmett at the kitchen island. He took a seat next to his friend, who already sat with a large mug of steaming hot chocolate. Esme had placed a tartan wool blanket around his broad shoulders, and he sat hunched over the steam lifting from the mug.

"What am I missing, Em? I know something's going on."

Emmett sighed, and if it were even possible, hunched over even further. "It's not my place to tell you everything, Edward. But, I'll share with you what I can."

Just hearing that, Edward knew whatever Emmett was going to tell him was going to be hard to stomach. Look at what it had done to Bella.

"You remember how Bella showed up without telling anyone she was coming?"

Edward nodded. Of course he did, he remembered every detail of seeing Bella again for the first time in years in perfect clarity. Especially how stunning she had looked in just a towel, how her lovely blush had graced not only her cheeks, but her neck and chest.

"Renee, our mother, kicked her out. And from the few things Bella has willingly shared with me, Renee detested Bella, which is odd considering she fought so hard to take her from Dad. She treated her pretty horribly, said some pretty terrible things. I'm sure you noticed how different Bella was when she came back."

Again, Edward nodded and swallowed the lump forming in his throat. "I don't know what Bella's plans were in telling you all of this, but I do know she was so scared of you guys finding out. She was worried you would all look at her differently, pity her."

It hurt Edward that Bella felt she had to keep this from him. A relationship meant trust and sharing, and she was clearly still having issues with that. He understood that she was dealing with some pretty horrible things, but he wanted to help her take the pain and bad memories away.

He was surprised to feel such an intense anger radiating from his chest. How a mother could be so cruel to her daughter was beyond him, and the fact that Bella had been victim to Renee's malicious treatment made him want to find the woman and hurt her. Without a doubt, he would make sure she got what she deserved for the treatment of her daughter.

"But what set her off?"

"This afternoon, Bella got a letter from Renee, and I have this gut feeling it wasn't the first. I read it, and all it said was 'I've found you.' I'll be damned if Renee does anything else to Bells."

"The Phoenix." It hit Edward all at once. He knew why Bella was pulling away.

"What?" Emmett sat up straighter, clearly confused.

"I told you guys I got a package earlier with an unstuffed Phoenix. Wasn't Bella living in Phoenix with Renee?"

"Yeah…" Emmett trailed off, his eyes brightening with understanding. "Renee's figured out you're seeing Bella. You need to watch out, Edward."

"I'll be fine, Em. The only person I'm worried about is Bella."

"Me, too."

Edward took a sip of his hot chocolate, relishing the warmth and smooth taste of his mom's specialty. The drink really could make you feel better.

"Boys." Carlisle descended the stairs, looking every bit as tired and haggard as Edward was sure everyone else felt. "I've finished with her stitches. She'll likely sleep through the night, so I suggest you get some rest while you can. I'm on call tonight, so I'll be leaving for the hospital momentarily. When I come back in the morning, I would like to talk to you both. I know you've been hiding something, and it's gone too far. I can't ignore this anymore, not when someone's been hurt."

Edward and Emmett nodded their heads like scolded children. Carlisle had the art of reprimanding without raising his voice, yet still getting the full meaning across, down to a tee. No one liked to be disciplined by Carlisle.

"If you need anything, or something happens, please call me. I can come home if it's an emergency."

Edward stepped forward rubbing his jaw, still sore from Bella's kick. "Thanks, Dad."

Carlisle sighed and placed his hand on Edward's shoulder to pull him closer. He gingerly grabbed his chin and turned it to angel it in the light. "Edward, please ice your jaw. I'll take a better look at it in the morning. Tylenol wouldn't hurt either."

Edward shook his head sheepishly, and pulled away, feeling unworthy of the attention.

I highly suggest you both finish your hot chocolate and head off to bed. Good night, boys."

Upon finishing their drinks, Edward and Emmett headed upstairs, weary and emotionally drained. Emmett had called Rosalie and updated her, making sure she was able to get home and to the Cullen's tomorrow. She was worried about leaving Emmett alone for the night, but agreed everyone should sleep. Edward insisted Emmett take his bed, while he took Alice's, who was spending the night at Jasper's.

Sleep didn't come easily for Edward. He would close his eyes only to see a kitchen covered in red, Bella in the middle of it all, terrified and calling for him. And as hard as he tried, he couldn't get to her.

Even though his body craved it, it seemed easier to forgo sleep. So he sat and waited. And for the first time in years, Edward cried himself to sleep.

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_Feedback?_

_-lmbrtvll_


	15. Chapter 15

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 15

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

**_AN: _**

**_Thanks to vjgm, and the most amazing person ever - Lisa, who returned this baby to me in mere hours. I hope she's feeling better!_**

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As Bella awoke, the first thing she was aware of was the heaviness of her body. She could tell she was lying in a bed, with the sheets tucked tight around her. She felt that her body was heavy enough to sink straight through the mattress onto the floor beneath, and moving her arms and legs took too much energy.

She groaned as she willed her body to stretch, only to discover that her mouth was dry and her throat ached for a cold glass of water. What the hell had happened?

She cracked open an eye and inspected the room. This definitely wasn't her room, and it definitely wasn't Emmett's. It actually looked very similar to the room she'd stayed in at the Cullens' when she'd first arrived in Forks. What was she doing here?

Her mind ached, trying to piece together the events that had led to her waking up in a bed that wasn't her own. She was about to close her eyes when she heard the door open, and soft light filtered into the room.

"Ah, you're awake. How are you feeling, sweetheart?" Carlisle gracefully entered the room, looking tired and worn, and sat beside her on the bed. He picked up her wrist and measured her pulse as she responded.

"Um, groggy. Confused. What happened?"

"We were hoping you could tell us. I don't know the whole story, but Edward called me early yesterday evening. You were having a panic attack."

"A panic attack?" Bella's voice cracked, and Carlisle helped her sit up and sip from a glass of water.

"Yes. When I arrived at your house, you had cornered yourself in the kitchen. You were incoherent, hysterical – you didn't recognize any of us."

"Not – not even Edward?"

Carlisle shook his head slowly. "You fought all of us. I had to sedate you, which is why you're feeling lethargic."

Bella rubbed her forehead, only to discover that her right hand was heavily bandaged.

"You cut yourself on broken glass – a shattered cup, from the looks of it. Seven stitches, twenty in your leg. You lost a bit of blood, which would also account for some of your fatigue." He brushed back Bella's hair, and she shifted on to the pillow as everything sank in.

"Nothing that won't heal, sweetheart. I would like to talk to you about your panic attack, though."

Bella sighed and shut her eyes. She couldn't remember what had caused the panic attack – she could barely remember the attack itself. But something was clawing to get out, something she was pretty certain she didn't want to remember.

Bits and pieces were starting to fall into place. Glass shattering, heat, Renee. Renee. The letter. Who knew where the letter was now. Emmett had probably read it since she hadn't exactly gotten a chance to fold it back up. The terrifying events from last night hit her with the grace and gentleness of a speeding train, leaving her winded and tense.

"Um." Her breathing began to speed up as one memory crashed into another. "There was a letter." She played with the collar of the shirt she was wearing as unwelcome visions danced in her mind.

"From whom, Bella?" Carlisle urged.

"R – Renee." She struggled to say the name, and tears fell from her eyes as the sticky tendrils of panic started to creep back into her chest. She gasped when she felt herself cradled in Carlisle's arms, her head pressed to his chest. The arms were unfamiliar and not like Edward's, but they were not unwanted.

He rocked her back and forth, managing to somewhat quell the tears that silently fell from her eyes.

"Why don't you start from the beginning?"

Bella sniffled and fisted Carlisle's azure dress shirt in her hand, relaxing in the feeling of protection his arms brought. She wasn't willing to let it go.

"Emmett didn't tell you?" she questioned. Bella could feel Carlisle shake his head.

"No. He mentioned nothing before I left for my shift last night. Both he and Edward are still sleeping right now."

Her lower lip trembled as she fought back a fresh wave of raw emotion. Was Emmett so ashamed of her, of her inability to stand up to Renee, that he wouldn't talk about it? The worst part was, he didn't even know the worst of it. Sure, he knew about the name calling and putdown, about the cake incident, but she had been unable to divulge the scarier memories for fear of the look of disgust she would find on Emmett's face.

She couldn't do this anymore. It was too hard. The whole situation was spiraling out of her control, and she couldn't keep Emmett in the precarious position she currently had him in. With a broken sob she crumbled and told Carlisle everything from moving in with Renee to the letter she had opened last night. He remained silent the entire time, allowing Bella to soak his shirt with her hot tears. And while she felt she should apologize profusely to him, she couldn't bring herself to pull away from his arms.

Emmett was a great older brother, but she had missed having a father figure in her life. The men Renee brought around were nowhere near what a father should be, and then – and then she'd missed her chance with Charlie. Oh, Charlie. She hadn't even had a chance to say goodbye, to mourn his death. Now, having a father there to protect her, to comfort her in his arms just as Carlisle was doing now, was what her body craved most.

Just thinking about Charlie, lying cold in the ground without a last chance to see the daughter that loved him so much brought a fresh, burning wave of tears and a painful lump in her throat.

"The worst part is," she admitted to the kind man who held her, "I never got to say goodbye to Charlie."

Bella felt Carlisle's grip tighten on her, and she tried to do the same. She was worn out; the tentacles of exhaustion creeping into her vision made her puffy and raw eyes heavy.

"Does Edward know any of this?" he asked finally.

Bella hoped that Emmett hadn't told anything to his best friend, but seeing as she didn't bring the subject up often, she really was unsure. "I don't really know. I asked Emmett not to say anything to him, but that can be a problem for him." She grimaced at the raspyness of her hoarse voice and was surprised when Carlisle managed to understand her garbled words.

"May I tell him?"

If Bella said yes, would she be taking the coward's way out?

"Okay." It was weak of her, but she couldn't bear to see the disappointment and hate blazing in Edward's emerald eyes.

Too overwhelmed to continue fighting her body, Bella nestled her head into Carlisle's chest and let the pull of sleep claim her.

******

Edward bolted into a sitting position from a deep sleep. He couldn't believe he had slept so soundly for – he turned to look at the clock next to the bed – four hours. He had fallen asleep after hours of lying wide awake and worried.

He threw a t-shirt on over his sleep pants and ran a hand through his unruly hair, grimacing as he realized how stiff and dry his face felt from last night's tears. He could hear quiet voices floating upstairs, most likely from his parents in the kitchen. He shuffled down the stairs to join them, stopping first to look in on Bella.

Edward opened the door as quietly as he could, happy when he noticed the lights were still off. Bella was still sleeping. She was curled on her side, one hand gripping the comforter, the other the pillow. Her soft, chocolate-colored hair was fanned out across the pillow, calling out to be touched. He remembered how soft her hair had felt running through his fingers. What he wouldn't give to go back to that time, when everyone had been happy and things hadn't this complicated.

He could see the wetness of fresh tear trails on her ivory cheeks, and he sighed. He wanted to be able to take away her sadness, not stand on the sidelines and watch her struggle.

Not wanting to wake Bella, Edward shut the door and descended the stairs to the kitchen. Esme, Carlisle and Emmett were sitting together at the kitchen table with large cups of coffee. Esme had her arm wrapped around her husband's shoulders, tenderly stroking his arm. Her face was damp, and Carlisle's eyes were red-rimmed and bloodshot, his dress shirt wrinkled and lightly stained. They had been crying.

Edward swallowed the lump in his throat and joined everyone at the table where Esme pushed a hot cup of coffee towards him. "Thanks, Mom."

He took a sip and shivered as the scalding liquid shook remaining cobwebs of sleep from his mind. After a few sips, Edward cleared his throat and rubbed his jaw.

"You should let me take a look at that." His father's voice was gravelly, another clear indication that he had been crying. Edward found it unnerving.

"It's fine, just a bruise. What's going on?"

Carlisle sighed and rubbed his eyes but didn't answer. It was odd for him to have an problem talking about something. Instead, Emmett turned to him with dead eyes

"Bella was awake a few hours ago. She told your father everything."

"Everything?" How much did he not know? Emmett had promised that he had told him everything he knew. That meant Bella hadn't told Emmett the whole story.

"I didn't feel right telling anyone – it was Bella's secret to tell, and I didn't think things would escalate to this." He scoffed grimly before continuing. "Turns out I didn't even know the full truth. I had no idea how bad it was. The grip Renee managed to put on my sister amazes me."

Edward's heart lurched as the gravity of the situation sank in. He thought what he had found out last night was horrible, but to hear that was only part of what Bella had had to endure was sickening.

"I'm going to have to report this to the authorities, son. Especially if we want to file a restraining order, which I believe would be the best first step."

"Is Bella okay with all this?" Edward knew that what his family was doing was in Bella's best interest, but he wanted to make sure she wasn't coerced into anything. Being pressured by them was the last thing she needed.

"She fell asleep before I could bring it up. She…"

Carlisle ran a hand through his hair and blinked furiously. "She's dealing with a lot. She still hasn't been able to mourn Charlie's death, and I know that that's just adding to the stress of the situation. I'm going to recommend she speak to someone professionally."

"I think that's a good idea." Edward vowed he would be as supportive as possible through this whole ordeal. Bella needed him, and he would be there for her, even if he wasn't the first person she turned to. He would wait.

The four of them sat in a morbid silence around the table, and Edward contemplated his next move. He knew Bella would be waking sometime within the next few hours, and he couldn't miss that. But would she push him away?

His stomach was wound in the tightest of knots as he played and replayed possibilities in his head – Bella seeking comfort in his arms, Bella pushing him away, Bella refusing to see him. It was enough to make him sick.

" – need those. Maybe Edward could drive."

Edward snapped back to reality at the sound of his name. "I'm sorry. What?"

"We need that letter and possibly Bella's computer. Would you drive Emmett to the house to pick them up? Your father should stay in case Bella needs him."

He nodded mechanically and practically ran upstairs to change. The sooner he left, the sooner he'd be back. He grabbed his keys from the key dish in the foyer and joined Emmett at the front door.

"Oh, would you boys mind maybe grabbing Bella a change of clothing? I'm sure she would love a shower and something fresh to wear."

The way Esme smiled made it seem like everything would be okay. If only he were at that age where a smile really could solve all his problems.

The drive to the Emmett's was strained, neither of them knowing what to say. Emmett even asked Edward to wait in the car, and so he took the opportunity to call the station to flip around his schedule. He was grateful that his boss was more than understanding about the situation. His job was important, but being there for Bella meant even more. She was his everything.

Emmett hopped back in the Volvo, and they sped off toward Edward's. "Did you find it?"

"Grabbed the laptop and letter. I swear, Edward, that woman has no right to be called our mother. I want to kill her – I don't think I'd be able to stop myself if I saw her right now."

Out of the corner of his eye, Edward could see Emmett clench and unclench his hands. "I'd be right next to you, Em."

******

Bella was cocooned in blankets on the couch with a mug of tea cupped in her uninjured hand. She still looked paler than normal, the slight rose-colored blush missing from her cheeks. Her eyes looked a little too bright, and her perfect pouty lips were dry. But Edward still saw her beauty.

Esme must have braided her hair, as it hung down her back in a thick chestnut plait. He recognized the chunky knitted sweater swimming on Bella's shoulders as his mother's first and only attempt at knitting. The thing was turquoise in color and it was baggy and disproportionate with large buttons and an imperfect weave. It was all her work though, and she'd adamantly refused to part with it upon completion. Comfort and sentimental value, she had explained. Truly Esme.

As soon as Bella spotted Edward and Emmett in the doorway, her face lit up, and she cracked a shy smile. He nudged Emmett forward, feeling he should give them a little time together before he intruded.

_Intruded?_

What _was_ he to her? The jealousy from yesterday was gone, only to be replaced with sadness and a feeling of resignation.

"It's good to see her up, isn't it? Esme wrapped an arm around her son's waist.

"Yeah," he sighed.

"She needs you."

Edward's gaze jumped to his mother's, her piercing green eyes searching his own. She knew.

"I'm right here," he argued.

"That's not what I mean, dear. You know that."

He rubbed his neck with his free hand, and he reveled in the feeling of his mother's arm wrapped around his waist. She was his mother – she could read him like an open book.

"I've seen how she looks at you. That girl loves you. She may be too afraid to admit it, but you have to realize that she's been living with rejection for years."

"So what do I do, Mom?"

Esme rubbed his shoulder. "Just be there for her, Edward. She needs stability, consistency. Just be there for her, and don't push."

"I'll always be there for her."

Esme kissed him on the cheek and gave him a little shove forward, chuckling. "Then go," she urged.

Edward stumbled slightly into the living room where Emmett was whispering into his sister's ear, causing her to giggle softly. There was his Bella.

"Edward." She spoke as soon as she saw him.

Emmett gave his sister a gentle kiss on her forehead and left them with some much – needed privacy.

Edward sat on the opposite side of the couch. Bella was staring down at her lap, and Edward guessed she was chewing her lip. He had noticed she had a tendency to do that when she was nervous or upset.

"Do you hate me?" she whispered.

"Bella – " his voice cracked " – how can you even think that?"

She shrugged her shoulders, still refusing to meet his gaze. "I lied to you."

"You didn't lie to me. You just didn't tell me the whole truth. And I understand. You were scared."

"I didn't want you to get hurt," she admitted.

"Love, the only thing that will hurt me is not being with you. I'm here to help you."

Bella crawled across the couch until she was right next to him. She grabbed his face and pressed her lips to his. Edward jumped slightly, surprised with her actions, before he relaxed into her touch.

He felt her tongue against his lips, asking for entrance, and he complied. She moved herself until was sitting in his lap, her hands still wrapped around him.

Their tongues met passionately, and Bella whimpered slightly. God, she felt so good. Her tiny body was pressed heatedly against his, and a dull burning was building low in his stomach.

Bella's hands clumsily went to the buttons on Edward's shirt, finally releasing them to reveal the t-shirt he was wearing underneath. Her hands felt glorious as they rubbed up and down his chest, even if one was bandaged.

They had never kissed like this before. He hadn't wanted to make Bella uncomfortable, so he had always let her take the lead.

Edward pulled his mouth from hers only to reattach it at her succulent neck. The air in the room was hot with the electricity between them, and he felt like every nerve in his body was tingling with energy. The touched each other with need and want, neither getting enough.

"Please, Edward," she moaned. "Make me forget."

It was like a bucket of ice water had been dumped over his head, and he pulled away. What the hell was he doing? Bella had thrown herself at him in an attempt to forget, and he had willingly gone along, practically taken advantage of her. He was disgusted with himself.

"No, Edward. Please. I need you." Bella tried to pull him back to her, but he resisted.

"I can't."

Bella jumped off the couch quicker than Edward would have guessed she could, clearly furious. "You mean you won't," she sneered. "Here I am, willing to be with you, and you fucking push me away."

"Bella – "

"Why, Edward?" She stepped back as he reached out to her. "Tell me why, Edward. Am I not pretty enough for you?"

Edward's heart drummed nervously in his chest. He knew what was coming, what was going to happen whether he liked it or not. Bella was going to have a meltdown. While he had technically been the one to set it off, he knew the reasons behind it ran deeper than his refusal to take advantage of her. She had been bottling up almost every emotion, feeling, and thought that Renee had instilled in her. It had to come out eventually.

"Am I too broken for you?" she continued, her previously pale face red with exertion from yelling and wet with tears. She looked so little and helpless in the too-big sweater and loose pants, standing enraged in the middle of the room.

"Too messed up, too imperfect?" She glared at him and looked frantically around the room before grabbing a pillow.

"I hate you, Edward Cullen." She threw the pillow at him as she continued to sob. "I hate you, I hate this. I hate being like this. I hate it so much."

Sensing her lack of will to fight, Edward took her into his arms and rocked them back and forth on their feet. Her sobs were muffled into his shirt, and her arms were folded against his chest as she allowed him to hold her.

He rubbed her back soothingly as she spoke into his chest. "I hate being like this. I hate this. I hate it so much. I love you." Her crying picked up, but she continued to speak. "I love you so much."

Her words might have been muffled, but he could hear her clearly. "I love you, Bella. I always will." He stroked the back of her head as he continued to comfort her, making gentle shushing noises.

His mom's voice echoed in his head. _Just be there for her_.

"I heard yelling and – " Emmett stood just outside the living room looking in worriedly.

"We're fine, Em. Everything's okay now."

Edward could feel Bella resting more and more of her weight against him, so he led her to the couch and prompted her to lie down.

"But I'm not tired," she argued with a yawn as Edward tucked the blanket around her tightly and brushed back her hair. Her face was a bit tear-stained, her eyes were puffy and her lips swollen. She was beautiful.

And she loved him, he thought with a grin.

"I've barely had a chance to see you," she pouted. Edward chuckled and felt as though a huge weight had been lifted off his chest.

"I know, love."

"Don't leave me."

Edward bent down and pressed a kiss to Bella's forehead, his eyes squeezed shut as he tried to convey just how much he truly loved her. "Where am I going to go?"

* * *

_A very very tough chapter for me to write, and the next one is proving to be equally as tough even though I know what I want to say. Reviews have been down, which doesn't help. Please take a second to send me some love, feedback, thoughts. _

_-lmbrtvll_


	16. Chapter 16

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 16

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

**_AN: First of all, much thanks goes to my amazing beta Lisa. And thank you for the amazing response to last chapter, I hope we can keep it up. Tissue warning with this chapter - I cried while I wrote it. It comes from a very personal place and I hope it's well received. _**

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The hazy sunlight streamed through the thick glass of the front windshield only slightly warmed Bella's body, still wrapped in Esme's misshapen sweater. Her arms were folded across her chest, not only to warm herself, but also to protect herself from what she might be walking into.

Bella could hear the sound of the birds calling to each other from the trees in the surrounding woods, and it seemed oddly unnatural. At least, it seemed unnatural here – a place filled with sadness and loss. She had imagined fog and rain and a eerie silence to welcome her to the last place she wanted to visit.

It was almost peaceful here, and that made Bella angry. She didn't want to feel at peace with something she hated and had no control over. Her anger was deep-seeded and rooted much further than she had thought.

She knew she should get out of the car – Emmett was waiting for her. But that would be admitting that what had happened was not a dream, and she would be bringing herself one step closer to a sharp slap in the face.

As much as she didn't want to admit it, she liked living in her little world of avoidance. She had learned long ago that avoidance worked – it kept her safe. But she couldn't avoid forever. Especially not when her brother was waiting for her.

Emmett stood right outside the car tapping his foot with a mock frown on his face and pointing to his watch. That was the epitome of her goofy brother. He always used humor to defuse a tense situation. Right now she didn't know whether she should laugh or cry.

She took a deep breath, pulled the sweater tighter around her and stepped out of the car. She shut the door behind her and leaned against it as she took in every detail of the scene before her.

The grass was a vivid green – like Edward's eyes. She shuddered and shook the image from her mind. She would _not_ compare Edward to anything in this place. She wouldn't tarnish what she had with him with the sadness of her old life.

The air here felt crisp and refreshing, and she closed her eyes as a fresh breeze ruffled through her hair.

_Bella_.

Her eyes snapped open as the voice faded into the air behind her. She whipped her head around to Emmett, trying to discern if he had whispered her name, but he was grabbing something out of the backseat of the car.

"Are you sure you want to do this, Bella? No one's forcing you." His warm brown eyes shone with concern. Bella knew he was worried about her, especially after yesterday's breakdown. Contrary to what everyone might have believed, she'd felt better afterwards. Exhausted, but freer, somehow.

Bella took a steadying breath and released it with a sigh. "Yeah, I'm sure."

A thick arm wrapped around her shoulder, and Bella leaned into Emmett's warm side. The gravel path crunched underneath their feet. Bella could feel her heart rate pick up as they grew closer to their destination. She was so scared of seeing _this_, of finally facing it.

She had to. She had to do it for herself, and she owed it to her family.

"Alright, Bells. This is it."

She focused on the stone in front of her, the hard gray lines with etching in elegant script.

_Charles Swan_

_Chief of Police_

_Beloved father_

_His memory will live on_

Bella sank to her knees, closing her eyes against the hot tears that burned her cheeks. This made Charlie's death final.

Reality hurt.

She pressed a shaky hand to the ground in front of the headstone as the other traced the epitaph. The familiar name felt so wrong in the hard stone.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. Her tears fell into the grass in front of her as if they were trying to reach Charlie themselves. The aching in Bella's heart grew to a burning forte as she apologized over and over again.

Bella's mind was out of control. Horrific images of Charlie's last few hours in the hospital blossomed in her mind. A sickly man – frail with a ghostly pallor, unmoving in a bed. There would be tubes and wires everywhere, and the only thing that would indicate life would be the beeping of the heart monitor. He'd probably been scared, feeling alone and abandoned as his daughter failed to show up at his bedside. There would be no chance to say goodbye, to have one last kiss or hug. This was it.

And Emmett, her poor brother, must have felt so overwhelmed with grief and uncertainty. He'd probably thought his sister was a cruel and heartless coward.

Even though it had been her mother who had kept her from rushing to Forks, who'd kept her from attending the funeral and mourning for the loss of one of the only two people who had shown her love, part of her felt like she was a coward. She'd been in Forks for a while now, and it had taken her this long to visit the gravesite. She and Emmett had barely mentioned Charlie, as if the topic were taboo and off limits completely. The wound in her heart was too fresh and raw, and coming here was like rubbing salt in it.

"I'm so sorry, Emmett." Bella took a deep breath that stuttered in her chest as her sobs spiraled out of control. She felt her brother kneel beside her and pull her against his side. She would have been comforted had she not felt his body shaking. He was crying.

Bella heard him sniffle and wipe his nose, keeping his arm around her the whole time. "Bells, listen to me. You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for. I promise you that –" a sob choked his words off, and Bella's heart lurched.

He took a deep breath and continued. "I promise that Dad knew you didn't abandon him. He knew you loved him with all your heart. He didn't doubt that, and neither should you."

Bella kept her face directed toward the ground. Grass seemed to be the only safe thing to look at. The headstone was morbid – a slap in the face with Charlie's name practically glaring at her. The sky was too blue and bright for a day like this, the trees were too peaceful, the birds too mocking.

Bella wanted to yell at the world – today should be rainy, cloudy, cold. Every other day in Forks was grey and dreary, except for the one day she had the willpower to bring herself face to face with one of the most painful moments of her life.

"I wasn't here for you, Em. God, you were all alone! I'm a terrible sister."

"You are my _sister_. That's why I love you and don't hold what happened against you. I now know why you didn't come. It's okay. Promise me you'll stop being so hard on yourself."

"Em…"

"Bella, please. Promise me." Emmett's tears had stopped and his voice was stronger.

"I promise." It wouldn't be easy, but she would try. For Emmett.

"Hey, um, do you think I could have a minute alone?" Bella wiped the tears from her face and kissed Emmett on the cheek before he got up off his knees and gave her space.

She felt her face crumple as new tears surfaced, and she buried her face in her hands. "I miss you so much, Daddy. I hope you can forgive me for not getting to say goodbye to you. I wish – I wish I had never left. I should have fought harder, I should have run away." She paused to sniffle. "I may not have been there for you, and no matter how much I wish I were, even if it were just to tell you how much I loved you. I can't change what happened. But I can be there for Emmett, and I will be. I'm going to be good for him, I promise."

Bella stopped for a moment and pressed her hand to the grass directly in front of the headstone. "I love you, Daddy. Goodbye."

Once her eyes were finally dry, Bella stood on aching legs and pulled her sweater back around her. She walked over to Emmett, her arms once again crossed over her chest, and she let him lead her back to the car and help her into the passenger seat.

Bella was groggy and achy when they got back to the Cullens', but she felt more at peace. She slowly hobbled her way back into the living room and plopped down on the sofa with a huff. She had presumed Edward to be at work upon seeing how quiet it was, but the instant her butt hit the cushion, he was right next to her.

"You look lovely in my mother's sweater," he whispered tenderly into her ear before lightly kissing her earlobe.

Bella's cheeks flushed at the comment and intimate gesture. It was hard for her to believe that yesterday she had practically tried to rip his clothing off like a woman denied. Well, technically she was, and up until yesterday's events, it was of her own volition.

She cuddled into the warmth of his body, easing the painful tension of the day.

"How was it?"

Bella sat silently for a moment with just the steady beating of his heart pulsing beneath her ear.

"Fine."

The grandfather clock in the corner ticked uncharacteristically loudly, which only emphasized the silent tension that filled the room.

"Do you – "

"I'd rather not talk about it," Bella interrupted quickly.

"Okay. What would you like to do, then? Emmett went to see Rosalie for a bit."

Bella spied a chessboard next to the fireplace. "Teach me how to play chess."

"Really?" Edward sounded genuinely surprised.

Bella nodded her head eagerly. She stood and pulled Edward from the couch, who moved the chessboard to the coffee table so that they could sit on the floor. Thirty minutes later, Bella was finally getting the hang of the specific pieces and what they did. One thing was for certain though – Edward had a lot of patience.

"So," he began, testing the waters after they had been playing for about forty-five minutes, "have you given any thought to maybe speaking to a therapist?"

"Edward, is this about yesterday?" Last night, Carlisle had presented Bella with a few options – different ways she could get help. She had told him she would think about it, and nothing had been mentioned since.

_She gets angry once, and Edward wants her to talk to someone about it. Though, there was the panic attack. _

Still, she was a private person, and she didn't like sharing every emotion and thought with someone. That was what had gotten her into trouble in Arizona. She had learned quickly that Renee didn't care what she thought, nor did she want to know how her daughter was feeling.

"No, not entirely. Love, I'm worried about you. I think that talking to an unbiased professional, someone who can help you with your panic attacks, would be really beneficial to you. Keeping everything to yourself is only going to make it worse."

_Make it worse because I'm one big problem._

"I don't think it's necessary, Edward," she retorted coldly.

"Not necessary?" Edward was tightly clutching one of the pawns in his hand, and Bella eyed it, waiting for it to break. "Bella, we had to stick a needle in your thigh the other day so you wouldn't hurt yourself. And yesterday – yesterday you lashed out because even though I wanted to more than anything, I kept myself from taking advantage of you."

Bella broke eye contact and stared at the chessboard. She desperately willed herself not to cry. No more tears, at least for the time being. She had been crying too much over the past few days.

"Believe me, love. I _do_ want to be with you, but I want it to be on our terms. Not to prove something." A finger lifted Bella's chin until she was looking into Edward's eyes. He cocked his head to the side and smiled. "Hey, I love you."

"I'll –" Bella took a calming breath and bit her lip " – I'll go. Talk to someone, I mean," she added quickly.

"Bella, I didn't say that to get you to go." Edward cupped her cheek in his hand, and she nuzzled deeper into it. He was safe, and she couldn't get enough of that feeling.

"I know," she whispered. "But I'll go. It'll be okay, right?" Right now she needed reassurance. She wanted to take that leap, but she needed to know he would be there to catch her when she fell.

Edward's eyes were glistening and bright with unshed tears, and he gave her a crooked smile. "It'll be great, baby."

******

Whispering voices slowly filtered into the background and swirled in Bella's head, urging her closer and closer to consciousness. She groaned and flexed the muscles in her body before rubbing her eyes. She didn't even remember falling asleep.

Bella looked around and noticed she had fallen asleep on the couch.

On top of Edward.

That was why she had been so warm.

He was lying on his side with Bella curled up next to him. She looked closer and noticed a small dark spot on his shirt, right where her head had been, and grimaced. She had drooled on him!

"Good morning, sunshine." Emmett's head was upside down, which made his huge, toothy grin appear frown-like.

"Comfy, Bells?" Bella was tempted to smack her brother, but she giggled instead. As much as he teased her, she didn't think she would ever get sick of it, not when she knew how life could really be.

"I must say, you two do make quite a lovely pair." Emmett held up a camera and dangled it in Bella's face. "I'm sure Esme would love to frame these."

Bella was grateful for the growing darkness of the room as her face began to burn in a blush.

"Don't worry, Bella. I made sure he only took cute ones." Rosalie was standing slightly behind Emmett. "I hope you didn't mind me stealing him for a little bit today."

"No," Bella assured her. "Not at all. It gave Edward a chance to teach me how to play chess. Well, he tried, at least."

Bella got off the couch and stretched before grabbing the nearest blanket and draping it over a still sleeping Edward. He was so cute when he slept, especially with his hand curled under his cheek. His bronze hair was sticking up in various places, and his chin held the tiniest bit of copper-colored stubble. His face was relaxed and wrinkle-free in his sleep, his pink lips parted, his lashes resting lightly against his cheeks. He looked so innocent.

Bella walked into the large adjoining kitchen, followed by Rosalie and Emmett. The couple immediately went for the already-brewed cup of coffee while Bella helped herself to more of Esme's hot chocolate.

"How are you doing, Bella?" Rosalie asked from atop the kitchen counter.

Bella found herself thinking back to her promise to Edward. Rosalie wasn't a professional, but she was still a bit of a stranger, as well as Emmett's girlfriend. She couldn't coldly push her away.

"I'm fine. Tired, apparently, but fine."

Rosalie smiled warmly. "I'm really happy to hear that. You and Edward looked pretty cozy out there."

Bella blushed again and hid her face behind a curtain of hair. "Um, yeah. I don't even remember how that happened."

Everyone laughed at her embarrassment, a nice change from the crying that had characterized the past few days.

"So, Bella, are you ready to head back to the house today? We need to talk to Carlisle before we leave, but I thought you'd appreciate sleeping in your own bed.

As much as she was looking forward to being in her own home, she didn't like the idea of being separated from Edward.

"Yeah, home would be nice," she sighed.

"Hello?" Esme's tinkering voice rang out.

Rosalie jumped off the counter and ran towards the front door. "I'll stop her before she wakes Edward."

Bella giggled at the silliness of the situation and sat on the closest stool beneath the kitchen counter. Emmett sat next to her and took her hand in his, giving it a little squeeze.

"Ah! Bella, Emmett. Just the two I was looking for." The impeccably dressed blonde joined them in the kitchen with a warm smile. When she was younger Bella had found Carlisle's presence comforting just as she did now.

"Rosalie says you're taking off soon. She also showed us quite a cute picture that I'm feeling inclined to frame and put in my office. Beware, my wife will probably have it screened onto a pillow within a week."

For what felt like the hundredth time that day, Bella's cheeks flamed. She felt like she was in a perpetual state of blushing.

Carlisle chuckled, his clear blue eyes crinkling at the corners.

"Anyway, I have a few papers I need you to sign. I managed to go through the right channels and get this expedited." He held up a piece of paper – an order of protection for both Bella and Emmett.

"The authorities have the letter and your laptop, Bella. We're hoping she's found soon." Carlisle placed the piece of paper in front of Bella, and she signed it before passing it off to her brother, who did the same.

Carlisle pulled a folded piece of paper from his pocket and handed it to Bella. "Here's the name of a colleague of mine. She's a psychiatrist. Give her a call when you're ready."

Bella delicately took the small piece of paper from Carlisle. "Thank you. I will."

Carlisle nodded and pulled her into a hug. She tensed, feeling awkward, but forced herself to relax and hugged him back. Carlisle had done so much for her – for them. He deserved more than a hug. She would have to talk to Emmett about doing something to thank all of the Cullens.

"Come on, kiddo. Let's get you home."

* * *

_I would love to hear from you! Review? Review!_


	17. Chapter 17

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 17

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

**_AN: _**

**_I apologize for the massive delay. School's hard! And my professors seem to have us on a rotating schedule of constant work. Ya know, just two essays, a midterm and a lab report a week... nothing big. And a new job with a literary agent on top of that. Seriously, I've never done this much reading in my entire life. It kind of sucks your will to be creative right out of you. _**

**_But thanks for hanging in there and sticking with me. Your reviews are fantastic and seriously motivate me, even if it doesn't seem like it. I appreciate every single one!_**

**_Huge thanks to Lisa for helping with the massive clean up efforts on this chapter. _**

* * *

"I'm proud of you, Bells."

"Thanks, Em. Too bad I'm not five anymore, when that still worked." Her nerves were still eating away at her as her leg bounced restlessly. Bella and Emmett were sitting in the waiting room of the Forks Mental Health Center. It wasn't until Emmett had dropped her off at the entrance that she'd realized she couldn't go in there alone.

"I'm sorry,I didn't mean that. I'm just nervous."

Emmett didn't even look the least bit angry. "I know, I know."

Waiting rooms were like a breeding ground for anxiety. At one end you had the exit, your escape to freedom taunting you as you awaited your appointment. At the other end was the dreaded door to where you would be forced to take down the walls and bare it all for some stranger.

Bella knew she had promised Edward she would go – he was ecstatic when she had told him – but she still hated the whole idea.

"Bella." A soft feminine voice called her from the opposite end of the waiting room. The woman was stylish in gray slacks and a blue cardigan with her soft hair pulled up to frame her face.

"Y – " Bella's voice caught, and she cleared her throat and tried again. "Yes."

The woman held out her hand, and Bella crossed the room and extended hers. The woman's handshake was firm and controlled, very confident. "I'm Dr. Denali. Come on in."

The office was, well, what Bella imagined a psychiatrist's office to look like. The walls were warm, lightly painted and sparsely decorated. There was fern in the corner, a desk at one end of the room, and a couch and armchair on the other.

"Have a seat, Bella."

Bella sat on the far end of the couch and crossed her arms and legs. Dr. Denali sat in the armchair with a legal pad and pen, her legs crossed delicately at the ankles.

"So, Bella, tell me about yourself."

"Um…" She was unsure of how much she should divulge.

"Anything. How about you start with basics." The doctor was writing in her legal pad already. What could she possibly need to write?

"I'm eighteen. I was born in Forks. Emmett is my older brother."

Dr. Denali smiled. "Great. What do you like to do for fun?"

"Read," Bella answered without hesitation. "Um, I'm learning to play chess."

"Who's teaching you?"

"Edward."

"Who's Edward?"

"Edward is, well, I guess he's my boyfriend."

_Boyfriend_.

Bella hadn't said that out loud yet, and hearing it made it more real. She smiled to herself.

Edward was her _boyfriend_.

"And how long have you and Edward been seeing each other?"

It was question after question from the doctor, and Bella was beginning to feel uncomfortable. But wasn't therapy supposed to feel uncomfortable?

"Now, Bella, Dr. Cullen mentioned anxiety."

Bella simply nodded her head.

"Tell me about the panic attacks. When do they typically happen?

"When I think about Arizona." Bella visibly shuddered.

"How do you feel, specifically, when you think about Arizona?"

"I feel like everything is spiraling out of control. I can't think, I can't breathe. My mind won't stop, even when I sleep."

Dr. Denali was nodding as she wrote everything down.

"Tell me, do you have any idea what exactly is triggering these panic attacks?"

For some reason, Bella felt almost guilty for talking about Renee. The woman was horrible, there was no doubt about that. But it was personal; it had happened to _her_. She didn't want people to think of her as the weak girl who had willingly stayed with a cruel mother for years, because that was most definitely not true. If she thought she could have gotten away with leaving earlier, she would have. In a heartbeat.

"Bella?"

She snapped her head up, slightly dazed.

"Triggers? Do you have any idea as to what sets off your anxiety?"

"My mother, Renee." Bella watched Dr. Denali write something, presumably her mother's name, down on her annoyingly yellow legal pad.

"And why does she make you anxious, Bella?"

Bella almost snorted. What about Renee didn't make her anxious?

"She wasn't very nice," she offered. _To put it mildly._

The doctor's brows furrowed beneath her chic thick-framed glasses. "Can you tell me what you mean by that?"

Bella could feel the panic creeping toward her as dozens of images flashed through her mind. "She scares me."

"How does she scare you?" Dr. Denali prodded.

The visions flew by at a quick pace, and Bella struggled to keep up with them.

_They had taken the bus home together, chatting the entire way about different ideas for their poster. Greg's mom had freshly popped popcorn waiting for them, and they had dug in as they spread their materials across the kitchen table. _

_Greg was cute with his curly blond hair and deep blue eyes. Bella had only been in Arizona for a few weeks, but that didn't make her crush any less intense. She giggled at his jokes and blushed when his skin brushed hers or when they made direct eye contact. _

_Here, with Greg in his house, his _home_, she could forget about Renee and the insults she constantly hurled at her. Maybe if she found a way to spend less time at home – no, not home – the house. Her home would always be with Charlie and Emmett. Maybe if she found a way to spend less time with Renee, life here could be bearable. _

_They spent hours that afternoon working on their project, and Bella even got to stay for dinner, sitting next to Greg. It was the best day she'd had had since moving to Arizona. _

_When they sky outside started to darken, Bella knew it was time to head back. Greg offered to walk her to her house, and she couldn't help but blush as she said yes. They took their time, and now more than ever Bella wished this moment could last forever. _

"_I had a really fun time working on the project with you, Bella."_

_Greg scuffed his feet as he walked, kicking at invisible pebbles. _

"_Me too," she replied. She hoped that didn't come out too enthusiastically. _

_All too soon, they arrived at Bella's front porch, and they stood facing each other awkwardly. _

"_Thanks for walking me back." _

"_It was my pleasure." Greg paused and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Bella, can I – "_

_Greg never completed his sentence. Instead, he leaned forward and pecked Bella on the cheek._

_The butterflies in her stomach increased tenfold, and she thought she might pass out._

"_Bella!"_

_She quickly pulled away the moment she heard the screeching. Greg looked mortified at getting caught and terrified he might get in trouble._

"_I'm… uh…I'm sorry," he stuttered. _

"_I'm the one who should be apologizing, kid. I'm sorry that my fool of a daughter pressured you into something like that. Let me warn you, she's not worth it. I'm sure you can find someone much prettier at school, someone with a brain. Don't let yourself get tied down with such a dim-witted girl, it can ruin your life. I would know, I was married to her poor excuse for a father, and she's just as bad."_

_Bella felt sick to her stomach, and Greg looked just as green as she felt. His eyes darted around nervously before he stumbled off the front porch and ran down the street._

The doctor was writing furiously on her notepad; had Bella just said all of that out loud? That memory hadn't haunted her in a while – it had been her first and only kiss until Edward. The next day at school, Greg told Bella that he thought they should finish the project individually. Greg must have told his friends what had happened, because Bella still remembered to this day the stares she'd received for the rest of the year.

"Well, Bella. It looks like our hour is almost up. I want you to know that I'm glad you've shared that memory with me. I think we'll be able to make great progress. For now, I'd like to give you a prescription for Clonazepam. Take half a pill if you start to panic or become anxious and don't feel you can get it under control. Also, you can take a full pill if you have trouble sleeping. But if you do take any during the day, be careful with driving until you know how it affects you." She smiled kindly. "Do you have any questions?"

Bella shook her head, eager to get out of the office and home with Emmett.

"Okay, then. I'll see you next week, same time."

Bella darted out the door and gave Emmett, who had managed to find an automotive magazine, a look before hurrying out the exit.

It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders – she felt elated, almost.

They were sitting in the car and buckled up before Emmett even chanced a glance at Bella. She knew what he wanted to ask, but knew he was too considerate to push.

"It was fine, Em. It's going to be hard, but I promised I would do it. So I am."

"If it helps, I'm proud of you."

***********

"So, Bella, have you done the deed yet? I'm surprised my brother has been able to control himself this long, with the way he looks at you."

"Alice!" Rosalie screeched.

Bella, Rosalie, and Alice were, as Alice had called it, bonding in the female fashion at a quaint spa in Port Angeles. Bella had had her doubts about going; she had never been to a spa before and had been feeling very clingy to Emmett lately, especially after her session with the psychiatrist.

Yet here they sat, like three ducks in a row, having their feet filed and rubbed and painted. Bella had almost kicked the woman giving her a pedicure when she had brushed a particularly sensitive spot. And, as was typical, Bella's face was on fire from Alice's question.

Rosalie placed a hand on Bella's arm. "You don't have to answer that."

"Bellaaa," Alice whined, "I'm not trying to embarrass you. I just know how much Edward likes you, and I'm curious."

"Um, no. We haven't." An awkward and embarrassing as this conversation was, Bella longed for girl talk. She just wanted to be a normal girl – to fit in with Alice and Rosalie.

"Alice?"

"Hm?"

"How – how will I know if I'm ready?"

"Oh, Bella," Rosalie sighed softly.

"I've got this, Rose," Alice interrupted. She hoisted herself up in her seat a little bit and clasped her hands in her lap.

"Bella, first of all, don't feel pressured. This should be a very special moment between you and Edward. I don't think there's really a way to describe what it feels like to be ready. All of a sudden, things are different – you just kind of know."

Alice had a dreamy, faraway look in her eyes, and Rosalie groaned. "Good lord, Alice. Do you think about anything else besides Jasper?"

Alice was silent for a moment, her finger on her chin. "Nope."

Everyone, including the beauticians laughed. This was exactly what Bella had needed.

*************

When they pulled into the Swan driveway, Bella immediately noticed Edward's Volvo sitting in front of the house. She tried to hold back the squeal of excitement and ended up choking on nothing while shooting out of the car and into the house.

Edward, Emmett and Jasper were sitting in the living room, taking bets on who would win the game currently on TV. Bella tiptoed over to Edward and gently plopped herself in his lap and snuggled into his chest. She heard a rumbling beneath her eyes as Edward chuckled and his arms wrapped around her.

"Hello, love." A kiss was pressed to her head. Bella looked up and smiled before kissing his dazzling lips. Words of velvet came out of that glorious mouth.

Edward's face glowed with satisfaction.

I did that, Bella thought contentedly. She smiled to herself and nuzzled deeper into Edward.

"Couldn't wait for us, could you, Bella?" Alice and Rosalie had finally appeared in the living room, and Bella's face fell. She felt terrible. In her excitement to get to Edward as quickly as possible, she had completely left them outside. It was beyond rude, especially after the day they had just spent with her.

"I'm so – "

"Don't you dare apologize. We were just teasing."

"Did you ladies have a nice time getting painted?

Bella snorted at Jasper's choice of words.

"We did," announced Rosalie. "Every girl needs a little bonding time and pampering. What have you boys been doing?"

"Oh, you know, rubbing dirt on ourselves, wrestling, chugging beer." Emmett flexed his arms. "Guy stuff."

"So, you've been sitting here watching the game the whole time," Rosalie stated bluntly. It wasn't a question.

Emmett turned his attention back to the game. "Yep."

There were only a few minutes left in the game; it was the top of the ninth, and Bella watched from Edward's lap. The game ended with a loud cheer from the boys, and Edward looked down at Bella as Jasper and Emmett went to join Alice and Rosalie in the kitchen.

"Were you planning on telling me your birthday was coming up?"

Bella gulped and averted her eyes. "No," she mumbled.

"Bella," Edward pushed, "It's your _birthday_. We should celebrate."

But birthday parties meant cake, and Bella remembered what had happened last time they'd had cake with a violent shudder.

"I don't think that's such a good idea, Edward."

Immediately, Edward's eyes lit up with understanding. "Ah, you see, I've already figured it out. We will be celebrating with ice cream sundaes."

Bella cracked a smile. Birthday sundaes could work, and Edward seemed to want to do this. "Okay, but no gifts."

Edward opened his mouth to protest, but Bella quickly shushed him. "My way, or no party."

"Fine," Edward groaned and pouted.

"Thank you. Now hand over the remote."

************

Edward blew out a tense breath as he ran a hand through his hair. Tomorrow was Bella's birthday, and he had yet to find the perfect gift for her. He had finished half of her gift last week, and while he loved it**, **he also wanted the light in his life to have something a bit more tangible. But it needed to be thought out; it needed to represent how he felt about her.

Maybe he _should_ have taken Alice up on her offer to help him find something.

No, this gift would be purely from his own ideas. Which was why he was standing unproductively in the center of the mall. A quick glance at his watch told him he didn't have much time left. It was already three o'clock and he was supposed to pick Bella up at six to take her to the restaurant.

It was a last-minute gathering; Emmett had been offered a position with the physical therapy department at Carlisle's hospital, something which Carlisle assured he had nothing to do with. Emmett's resume spoke for itself. Nonetheless, it was great news, and Esme, Alice, and Rosalie wanted him to have a special night.

Edward and Bella were also having a mini celebration of their own. Bella had successfully completed her first week as a part-time student, and she had enjoyed it. He remembered how nervous she'd been the day before classes started. He actually found it quite endearing.

He couldn't remember being that nervous when he'd first started, but Bella was different. College would be unlike anything she had ever experienced before, and he truly hoped it turned into something she loved – something that helped her grow.

He was also extremely proud of his girlfriend for keeping her promise and continuing with therapy. They hadn't spoken about it much, but from what Edward could tell, therapy was going well. He smiled. Things were going very well. And then it hit him. He knew exactly what he wanted to get Bella.

Three hours later, Edward was buckling Bella into his passenger seat and driving off towards the restaurant with her hand in his.

When they arrived, the hostess guided them back to a private room where everyone except Emmett and Rosalie were already waiting. Esme hurried over and hugged Edward before running a hand through his hair in an attempt to tame it.

"Mom," he groaned. "I'm a big boy. Besides, we both know that won't work."

Esme just smiled sweetly before pulling Bella into her arms. "You look beautiful, dear."

As was expected, Bella blushed a brilliant pink, and Edward's heart sped up. She was breathtaking, and to see her smile with the sparkle back in her eyes made him happy.

Emmett and Rosalie arrived shortly after. Emmett was grinning like a fool and looking dapper in slack and a button-down. It was clear that Rosalie had dressed him.

"Congrats, man," Edward praised as he shook his hand.

Dinner was fun and loud and happy and one of the best nights Edward had had in a long time. Champagne was ordered for the table, and a toast was made for new beginnings – new jobs, new starts. It was refreshing.

Edward's heart jumped when a small hand grabbing his larger one, pulling him from his thoughts. Bella, slightly tipsy from the champagne, giggled at him. Her face was flushed, and her hair was in a slight disarray from the soft curl it held. To him, she looked like an angel.

"How are you doing there, love?"

"Mm, I'm great." She stifled a yawn and grinned at him.

Edward chuckled and brushed back a stray curl from her face. "Maybe we should get you home. You seem a little tired."

Bella pouted, only to be interrupted by her own giggling. She yawned again. "Maybe you're right."

Edward helped Bella up and into her coat before bidding everyone a good night. The car ride was quiet, but Bella's hand never left his.

"Stay here?" Bella asked as they made their way inside her house. "I'm just going to change into something comfy."

Minutes later Bella reemerged at the top of the stairs in a pajama set Alice had probably picked out for her. The deep blue looked lovely against her creamy skin.

"Edward," she called. "Come lay down with me." The padding of light feet across a carpeted floor followed.

He found Bella already on her bed, waiting for him. "Get up for a second."

Bella gave him a puzzled look, but didn't hesitate. He reached for her covers, pulled them down and motioned for her to get back in bed, following her. He pulled the covers tightly around them and scooted Bella closer to him. He could smell her shampoo, and the warmth of her pressed against him was glorious.

"Thanks for tucking me in."

"Anytime, my love." He kissed the back of her head.

Bella wiggled against him, trying to find a comfortable spot and Edward bit back a groan. She had no idea what she was doing to him, but if he didn't move, she would soon. He allowed himself one more minute of this warm and intoxicating heaven before he pulled away and tucked the covers around his girlfriend.

"Get some rest. I'll see you after work tomorrow for your birthday. Sleep well."

Bella pulled him in for a sweet kiss before curling up under the covers and shutting her eyes. Edward could have watched her all night, but he unfortunately needed to catch some sleep of his own before work.

He was almost completely out of her room when she called to him. "Oh, Edward?"

"Yes, love?"

"I love you."

* * *

_Reviews would make my life so much better! Feed the crazy writer please._


	18. Chapter 18

Penname: lmbrtvll

Story Title: Purple Summer

Chapter: 18

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Belittled and verbally abused by Renee, Bella thinks poorly of herself. Heading back to Forks to live with her brother Emmett, will her friendship with Edward blossom into romance? Can he make Bella see that she's worth so much more than she thinks? AU, AH

Much thanks to Lisa for taking the time to help me fix this up. She's awesome. Period

* * *

Bella's bed was like heaven – warm, soft, and too comfortable to leave. She willed herself to slip back into the blissfulness of her dreamland that she'd left only moments ago. She had been having such a _good_ dream, one that featured Edward shirtless. She had felt so safe with Dream-Edward and surprisingly relaxed. This Edward had been doing _things_ to her, things that if the real Edward were to do, she would blush until she were forty. But goodness, it had felt amazing and so right.

As she kept the image of her shirtless Edward centered in her mind, she felt herself slowly relaxing into the realm of unconsciousness, at least until something tickled her nose. She scrunched it in attempts to squelch the itch and sighed when it abated. Relief didn't last for long when the itch returned. Bella wiggled her nose again, trying to ward off the annoying tickling sensation.

She was wiggling her nose extra long when she heard a chuckle.

_What?_

She cracked open a bleary eye to see a hazy face above her.

"Good morning, sunshine."

She recognized the smooth velvet timbre of the voice immediately. "Edward? What are you doing here?"

Bella felt the bed shift slightly as Edward moved and placed something next to her.

"Well – " Edward kissed her head "-I wanted to bring my beautiful girlfriend breakfast in bed on her birthday."

"Edward," she groaned. "You didn't have to do this. It's my birthday, not a big deal. If it were really up to me, I wouldn't even acknowledge it."

Edward shrugged and scooted next to her on the bed. The were sitting side by side against the headboard.

Like a married couple, Bella mused.

"What can I say?" Edward playfully sighed as he fed her a strawberry off the tray. "I wanted to spoil my girl."

_My girl_.

Bella nudged him in the ribs with her elbow. "You're lucky I like you so much. If you were anyone else, I might have had to call Emmett."

Edward laughed, shaking the bed. "Emmett was the one who let me in."

Bella grumbled, but before she could complain further, another strawberry was popped in her mouth.

"Eat," Edward ordered. He looked down at his watch. "Alice will be over in two hours to decorate, so I suggest you be dressed before then, if you want any say in what you wear today."

Breakfast was delicious, and enjoying it with Edward next to her made it even more so. Bella took his advice, and as soon as she was done eating, she went to find something to wear. As Edward took care of the tray, Bella decided on a nice pair of dark jeans and a blouse. It was _her_ birthday after all, and she wanted to be comfortable. There was no way she'd be forced into a dress today.

As Bella was finishing up the last of her makeup, a tinkling voice cut through the relative silence of the household, causing Bella to wince slightly. "Bella! Where are you?"

The sound of feet jogging up the stairs to her room alerted her to Alice's near presence. The tiny girl burst into her room with an oversized smile plastered on her face. "Happy Birthday!"

Bella didn't know what hit her as she found Alice wrapping her small arms tightly around her. "I'm so excited for you. Today is going to be so much fun. Is the backyard okay for me to start setting up?"

Bella laughed at Alice's eagerness and nodded. "Sure. You should try and rope my brother and Edward into helping you. I'm sure they've managed to find some sort of sports game on TV. You might as well make use of them."

"I'll have them obeying my every command. No one dares defy Alice when it comes to party planning."

Bella laughed as she followed an overeager Alice downstairs, her eyes widening in shock when she saw the various decorations scattered about the house. Streamers hung from the ceiling, balloons were anchored to anything available, and a huge "Happy Birthday" sign graced the foyer.

So much for a low-key affair.

An arm snaked around Bella's waist and pulled her into a well-muscled side. "Can I borrow you for a minute, love?"

Edward didn't even have to ask; she would do anything for him. "Of course."

Bella was led into the now-empty living room as Alice swiftly got started on organizing the backyard. Edward pulled out a decent sized box that had been hiding in a bag beside the sofa. She had no idea what could be in the plain, unmarked box. "What is it?"

Edward chuckled and ran a hand through his hair. "Bella, love, just open it."

Bella huffed in mock annoyance. While she disliked surprises, she knew she would love anything from Edward.

She opened the box carefully, taking care to peel of the tape rather than rip the paper. She was just as careful with the delicate tissue paper inside. Her care and patience was rewarded as her gift came into view. Molded from a rich, smooth wood, the box was elegant. The hinges and small latch on the front were iron and pretty much the only ornamentation.

"The color, um, it reminded me of your eyes." Edward's voice wavered slightly, and that was when Bella realized just how nervous Edward was.

Because he was sitting on the floor in front of her while she sat on the couch, Bella slid off the cushions onto her knees beside him. She stared into his bright green eyes, twinkling with love and hope, and stroked his cheek before kissing him chastely.

It may have been a sweet kiss, but Bella made sure it was with every emotion she could muster. He _needed_ to feel how she felt about him. _He_ made her cheeks flush, her breathing hitch, her heart flutter. She poured every ounce of love into that kiss.

"Edward, it's absolutely gorgeous. Really, I love it."

Edward's eyes sparkled as his grin lit his face. "You haven't even seen the best part. Open it."

Confused and curious, Bella slowly undid the latch on the front of the box and eased the top backwards. A gentle song floated to her ears – a melody she recognized right away. She inhaled with a quiet gasp, caught completely off guard by the specialness of the gift she held in her hands.

On the underside of the lid was a framed picture that brought tears to her eyes. It was the picture of her and Edward fast asleep on the couch together. They looked so peaceful, and her body seemed to fit into Edward's side perfectly, as if they were two pieces to a puzzle.

Bella mused over that thought. _Very appropriate_. She had a puzzle, broken and missing so many pieces when she had arrived in Forks. But now, the gaps were filling in, and she was slowly starting to feel more and more complete. With each new piece in place – Emmett, Carlisle and Esme, Alice, Rosalie, Jasper, and most importantly, Edward, the cracks of her puzzle began to seal.

"It's your song, Bella. I wrote it for you when you first arrived. It represents every emotion you awaken within me, every pure entity you embody."

Edward's voice had never sounded so sweet.

"I don't know what to say," Bella replied. She was trying so hard to control her emotions. "This is the most perfect and thoughtful gift anyone has ever given me. Thank you."

Her sentence ended in a whisper as she swallowed the lump in her throat. She pressed her lips to his again.

"Is this actually a recording of you playing?"

Edward nodded with excitement. "The guy at the store just needed a copy. It was a lot easier than I thought it would be."

Bella's fingers traced over the smooth wood as she inspected every inch of the finely crafted box. "It's beautiful. Thank you."

She leaned forward and kissed Edward again, wrapping her arms around his neck. It made her happy that he seemed to flourish under her praise.

Their lips met again, and chills shot down Bella's spine as electricity seemed to course from Edward. She moaned softly into his mouth as his hands explored her sides.

"Whoa!"

Bella and Edward flew apart at the unwanted interruption. Emmett was standing in the doorway to the living room with one of his large hands shielding his eyes. "Not something I really wanted to see, guys."

With a heated face, Bella ran a hand through her mussed hair and wiped her swollen lips.

"Um, Emmett, did you need something?" Bella asked as Emmett kept his face covered.

"Grills on," he grunted. "I'm taking orders. Hamburger, hot dog, both?"

Edward answered for Bella. "Two burgers. I'm going to make Bella one of my Cullen specials."

"Great, thanks. I'm going to leave now before I throw up."

Bella giggled and leaned her forehead against Edward's chest. She sighed and closed her eyes, enjoying the moment. "I guess that's a sign we should join everyone else."

"I guess you're right." Edward stood first and helped Bella to her feet, making sure to keep an arm around her waist.

Standing, and with balance in check, they joined the ever–growing crowd out back. Emmett was manning the grill with Rosalie looking over his shoulder and pointing to whatever needed to be flipped next. Emmett would scowl at her, but Bella could see the love and jest behind it.

While their patio wasn't as new or as large as the Cullen's, no one seemed cramped or in the way.

Carlisle and Esme were sitting side-by-side, sharing a beer. They looked so in love. Nerves fluttered in Bella's stomach as she stared at the beautiful couple. She wanted that to be her and Edward years from now.

"Bella!" Alice danced over to her and Edward, pulling Jasper along beside her.

"You may have gotten away from me this morning, Bella, but I have plans for you." Alice grinned as she handed Bella a small envelope. "It won't bite. I promise."

Bella carefully tore open the envelope to reveal a simple card containing a gift card and the words "Alice's Promise."

"What…" Bella held up the card, puzzled.

"It's my promise to you. I know my dressing you up gets annoying, and my shopping. So this is my promise to rein it in. Instead, you and I will go shopping together, and I'll just help you."

Bella was touched. While she didn't enjoy shopping in any context, it was the thought behind the gift that counted.

Edward threw his head back and laughed, causing Alice to whack him in the stomach.

"Don't laugh, Edward," Bella admonished. "It means a lot."

She turned to Alice. "I love it, Alice. Thank you."

Jasper stepped forward with a shy smile on his face. "Happy Birthday, Bella. This is from both of us." He handed Bella a thin cardboard box with a festive blue bow. Bella smiled when she saw what was inside.

Laughing, she flung her arms around Jasper's neck. "Thank you. I'm sure we'll both enjoy using this."

"We? What is it?" Bella giggled at Edward's curiousity.

"It's a gift card for a couple's massage."

"Oh, wow. That was really thoughtful of you guys."

*******

The burgers and hot dogs were finally finished and placed on a large platter on the table with next to a big salad, potato salad and coleslaw. Bella watched with fascination as Edward dutifully made a Cullen creation and handed it to her with care. It was hilarious how serious he was about his their burgers.

"Now, Bella." Carlisle was standing with Esme at the head of the table, looking a bit anxious. This couldn't be good. "We all know how much you don't like getting gifts, but we're hoping you'll hear us out on this."

Bella gulped and nodded.

"Emmett, Rose, Esme and I all went in on this gift together. You may call it extravagant, but it's not. It's practical. And necessary, especially with Emmett gone. It's waiting over at our house, thanks to some last-minute touches by Rose. I'm hoping this picture will suffice until you can get over there."

Carlisle extended a Polaroid to Bella, who stood to take it and flipped it over. It was a maroon Acura MDX, brand new and shining beautifully in the sun.

She plopped back down in her chair as all the air left her lungs. "Are you crazy? This is mine? I'm – this – I don't know what to say!"

"Bella, please," Esme interrupted. "It only makes sense. You drive to school, and Emmett drives to work. There's no way you two can share a car."

Bella jumped from her chair and threw her arms around Carlisle and Esme. "This is incredible. Thank you!"

She hugged Emmett and Rosalie next, who laughed at her excitement.

Bella was so overwhelmed and excited, she could barely eat her burger. She listened eagerly as Rose explained the few upgrades she had performed on her car, thanking her brother's girlfriend profusely each time.

"Sundae time?"

Emmett, clearly excited, was headed towards the kitchen before anyone could even answer him. "I'll go help him," Bella laughed.

The two made quick work of gathering the ice cream, bowls, and various toppings. Thanks to Emmett's large arms and a tray Bella had miraculously discovered, they only had to make one trip.

"So, Bella," Alice questioned with her spoon still in her mouth, "what did Edward the Great give you? He wouldn't tell any of us what his super special gift was."

"Oh, really?" Bella was surprised that no one else had been in on Edward's gift. She thought he would at least have gone to Emmett for advice, but Emmett, like everyone else, was clueless.

"Let me grab it." Bella had left the gift in the living room so that nothing would happen to it. She looked by the couch, where she had thought she'd left it, but it wasn't there. Her eyes scanned the floor as she thought back to just an hour ago. Where had she left it?

"Well, look at you."

Bella's heart froze as she recognized the voice. She turned slowly, the hair on the back of her neck standing on end.

Renee clicked her teeth against the roof of her mouth as she stepped forward. "What is that all over your face? And what are you wearing?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I've come to get you, of course. I've come to take you home." Renee straightened up as if she were a proud woman. She looked older, more tired than Bella remembered. Her skin was gray, and her hair was frizzy and unkempt.

"I'm not going anywhere with you. I'm happy here. And loved."

Renee barked a harsh, gritty laugh, swaying slightly as she did. Bella couldn't believe how she much she had changed, how unhealthy she looked.

"Loved? You're loved? No one could ever love you." Renee stepped towards her, as Bella stepped back.

"You – you're wrong."

Renee looked around, sneering at her surroundings as if she were reliving a bad memory.

"This godforsaken place hasn't changed a bit. What a dump. It really needs to be taken care of."

Bella's heart was pounding. She had no idea what Renee was going to do, and she was confused by her erratic behavior.

"Such bad memories here, dear. I need to make it go away."

Renee's thin yet strong hand grabbed Bella by the wrist and pulled her across the house. Renee shoved her down the basement stairs, and Bella landed against the wall with a thud.

"You want to live here so much, you love this goddamn house? I'll make sure you never leave it."

Renee opened one of the makeshift cabinets by the stairs and shuffled around for a moment as Bella regained her bearings. Her head spun from the impact with the wall, and her sight was spotty.

Renee pulled out an old can of paint thinner and twisted off the top, splashing a little around the basement before pulling out a book of matches with a shaking hand.

"Please," Bella begged. "Please don't. You don't want to do this."

"But I do, dear. I do."

Renee struck the match, stared Bella in the eyes and dropped it. "You had such potential, Isabella. What a disappointment."

She spun on her heel and teetered up the stairs, Bella following after her.

The door slammed in Bella's face, and she could hear a chair scraping across the floor as it was placed under the door handle.

"Damn it! Let me out! Please!"

The smoke in the room thickened as more of the room caught fire. Renee had done a poor job of dousing the room with the paint thinner, but she'd poured enough to get a decent fire started. Bella's lungs burned as the amount of oxygen in the room lessened.

She knew that she should stay low to the ground, but the stairs were the furthest from the actual fire. It was a lose-lose situation.

******

_What's taking Bella so long?_

Bella had left the patio twenty minutes ago to grab the box Edward had given her. He knew that she still had the tendency to get overwhelmed sometimes, which was why he liked to give her space, but this was unusual, even for her.

"Hey, do you smell that?" Jasper had his nose in the air as he sniffed. Edward imitated him, curious as to what Jasper smelled.

"It smells like something's burning." Everyone looked at Emmett, who threw his hands up in the air. "I promise, the grills off."

"Oh my God! Emmett, there's smoke coming from the house!"

All eyes turned to where Rosalie was pointing, and time seemed to move in slow motion. The stream of ashy smoke snaking through a small basement window was growing thicker by the second.

"Rose, call 911."

"Good riddance, I'd think."

The woman that seemingly appeared out of nowhere on the patio looked familiar, but Edward couldn't quite identify her. "Nothing but bad memories here."

"Renee?" Emmett had her by the arms in seconds, forcing her to look at him. "What are you doing here? What are you talking about?"

"Just getting rid of the unnecessary and useless."

_Useless._

How many times had Edward heard Bella mutter that word? It was because of this woman that Bella felt that way.

Edward ripped Renee from Emmett's hands. "What did you do with Bella?"

"Edward!" Esme's frantic cry marginally lessened the intense anger he felt towards Renee. As unkind and evil as she was, Esme had raised him better than to forcefully touch another.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm merely disposing of the disposable."

"She's not disposable! How you can talk about your own daughter like that is beyond me. Bella is a beautiful, caring, amazing person, and I love her."

Renee's eyes were glazed over, and her gaze was unfocused. "We must be talking about different people," she muttered.

He wasn't getting anywhere with Renee's twisted answers. He dropped his hands and flew inside the house, trying to find any clue that could help him locate Bella.

The kitchen looked untouched, as did the living room and laundry room. But the further he got into the house, the thicker the smoke got. He followed the trail of smoke to the door leading to the basement that was barricaded with a chair. That had to be it.

He flung the chair away from the door and threw it open, immediately blinded by thick smoke that rolled in his face. "Bella?"

He didn't hear anything. He waved his hand in front of his face as he descended onto the first step, his lungs already beginning to burn.

His foot nudged something soft as he felt for the second step. He scrambled around and bent over, feeling whatever was in front of him. It took him mere seconds to realize it was Bella's body in front of him.

"Bella? Bella, can you hear me?" It was too smoky to see if she was awake so he gathered her in his arms and ran up the stairs and out the front door. His lungs were aching with soot and exhaustion, but it barely registered. All he cared about was the precious body in his arms.

"I've got her!"

He dropped to his knees in the front yard, laying Bella out on the small patch of grass. Her eyes were closed and except for the soot, her face was colorless. "Bella? Love, can you hear me?"

He bent his head down to her mouth, his heart stopping when he realized the absence of sound. She wasn't breathing.

Edward deftly tilted her head back so that her airway was open, checking again for breath sounds and chest motion. She still wasn't breathing.

He covered her soft mouth with his and gave the first of two rescue breaths. He checked her chest to be sure it moved when he breathed into her mouth before giving the second rescue breath.

Automatically his hands went to her chest. He placed the heel of one hand over the center of Bella's delicate chest and his other hand over that. He'd never been more thankful for his training then he was at that moment. After thirty compressions he continued with another rescue breath.

"Come on, Bella!"

She still lay under him, unresponsive.

"Edward! Let me help."

Suddenly, Carlisle was at his side as if he'd appeared from nowhere. He took over the chest compressions and signaled to Edward when he should breath.

"Where the hell is the damn ambulance?"

Emmett had called 911 what felt like hours ago. It was mandatory that an ambulance be dispatched with every fire call, and both should be here any minute.

Edward bent down to give another rescue breath when Bella inhaled a shaky uneven breath before a fit of coughing overwhelmed her.

"Thank God." Edward cradled Bella's upper body in his arms, hoping that the change in position might ease her breathing.

"Sh, you're alright, love. I've got you."

Her eyes didn't open, and she was still wheezing, but she was breathing on her own, and the sound of sirens approaching the house reassured him.

"R-renee." Bella could barely speak, but Edward heard her clearly.

"Jasper has her. I'm so sorry." He brushed back her hair. "We've got her. She'll never hurt you again."

With one last wail of the siren, the fire engine pulled up to the house, as did the ambulance. The firemen wasted no time in getting to the fire.

The paramedics brought the gurney to Bella's side, and Edward worked hard to fight his protective nature over her. He hesitated to let her go, but he knew he needed to let the medics do their job. He gently laid her out on the gurney and backed off. He did request, however, that he be allowed to ride with Bella to the hospital, which he was granted immediately.

A police car was the last to pull up, and it parked right next to the ambulance just as they were loading Bella in.

"We got a call about a possible arson?"

"Yes, sir. She's right over there." Edward pointed to where Esme, Alice, Rose, Emmett and Carlisle had congregated. Jasper still had a hold on Renee, which to Edward was probably unnecessary. She seemed… off.

The police were going to need to talk to Emmett, so Carlisle would be driving him, Rosalie and Esme to the hospital after answering questions. Alice and Jasper were going to take care of anything that needed to be done at the house before joining everyone at the hospital.

Edward climbed into the ambulance next to Bella and took her limp hand in his. She had been in and out of consciousness, and while he knew that was common, he would feel much better after she had been examined at the hospital.

Bella's eyes flickered open briefly, the gorgeous brown surrounded by red. "Edward."

"I'm here, love. I'll always be here."

* * *

Well, we're pretty much at the end. Just a nice epilogue to wrap things up. All I ask is that you review, they mean the world to me. I'm not above begging for reviews at this point, seeing as we're almost done. So many people read and don't review - let's change that!


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